It's contract negotiation time for Hank and he's going for a raise ... and a golf cart.
WAR
26.1
Wins Above Replacement
“Hank's Contract” ranks #57 of 90 The Larry Sanders Show episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 74.6 — Great. The episode packs 36 scored jokes at 1.3 per minute, averaging 6.8 on craft and 6.6 on impact, with Larry landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
Get weekly comedy rankings
Join comedy fans getting new analyses, score drops, and the funniest moments each week. Free, no spam.
Top Jokes
Artie: You did have that offer to go on after Nightline, didn't you?
Larry: Fuck no.
Artie Larry Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Artie: How do you place a value on a man who introduces Wynnona Judd as 'TheJudd'?
Artie Character Comedy Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Hank: I had to pay for it myself, so don't tell anybody, okay?
Hank Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Callback Hank: There's no Cavett. You hear me? Zip on Cavett. I'm bluffing.
Hank Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Hank: She was half theJudds. Now there's just one of them, so she's a... she is a Judd. She is a singleJudd!
Hank Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback All Jokes — 36 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ George: The worst thing you can do is box a left-hander. Why? They're put on backwards as it is.
George Observational Absurdist ★ Rewatch Larry: Wouldn't that prepare you properly? That's a great idea.
George: I wasn't born yesterday. I never thought about that.
Larry: you'll agree with me... I don't think I should cave in, right?
George: No, not at all. Belly-bump or do something.
Steam coming out of my ass, Arty.
Artie Cringe/Discomfort Observational Artie: At the moment, the latest demand is a golf cart to drive around the studio. Poor deluded bastard.
Artie: My dog wouldn't eat that shit.
Artie Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Callback Artie: Do you think that stain on his pants is from the gumbo? I don't think so.
Artie Cringe/Discomfort Visual Gag Callback Hank: Kenny Stabler? He played football. Basketball. I didn't have any spare footballs around when he was on the show... so it's the closest kind of ball I could find.
Artie: How do you place a value on a man who introduces Wynnona Judd as 'TheJudd'?
Artie Character Comedy Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Larry Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Callback Artie: Fuck it, it's free cake. We can't miss this.
Artie Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Hank: If someone invented a camera that could take, you know, snapshots of our feelings... I would take a picture of this moment and keep it in the wallet of my heart forever.
Hank Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch I say he goes right into the cruise director story.
Bet you a hundred bucks it's the telephone story.
Every time we have a going-away party for you, it's just too much of a downer.
Barbara: That number you gave me was to some dry cleaner's in Torrance.
Hank: Yeah, the area code got changed.
Barbara: Bullshit. I am not your whore.
Hank: People see you in enough of those lawn furniture spots... they tend to fantasize about you.
Hank Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Larry: Why do I need this car anyway? I already have a car.
Car salesman: 'Cause you deserve it. It's safer, and it's classier.
Larry: let Arty and I take care of the strippers... because we can probably find one that doesn't know you.
Larry Character Comedy Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Hank: She was half theJudds. Now there's just one of them, so she's a... she is a Judd. She is a singleJudd!
Hank Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Hank: What about the time I chipped my tooth on the bathroom urinal? What the fuck is so comical about that?
Larry: It was a back tooth, Hank. I don't know how you did it.
Hank Larry Cringe/Discomfort Physical/Slapstick ★ Rewatch Hank: That was the speaker phone. Nice try.
Hank: When you let one go, boy.
Larry: Hello. That was the speaker phone.
Hank: Nice try.
Artie: I was eating a sandwich in my office when suddenly I heard you guys.
Artie Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Hank: I'm tired of being your personal village idiot.
Hank Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Robin Williams: If men carried the baby, wouldn't it? He'd be like, 'I got things to do. Get it out! Yeah, right, okay. Yeah, okay, I see it. Come on.'
Robin Williams: It's just too damn easy. He looks like a before from Hair Club.
Larry: I can't go with you on that. I cannot.
Larry: my head reminded you of your penis after a cold swim... I was honored.
Larry Callback Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Callback Robin Williams: He's hung like a field mouse. It's like a little sundial. Honey, what time is it? Get the baby. It's 3:00. Oh, 2:30 now. It's real cold.
Artie: Don't you know? No, my TV stops at channel 13... the way it's supposed to.
Artie Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Hank: Hey, you untalented, overpriced sidekick... you're just another piece of meat to us... so why don't you take what we gave you last year and be happy with that... you worthless piece of shit?
Hank Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Hank: There's no Cavett. You hear me? Zip on Cavett. I'm bluffing.
Hank Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Shel: It's that golf cart I told you about last week.
Artie: I smell urine here.
Larry: I don't mean on these stairs. I mean, you know, the network.
Larry Reaction Beat Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Callback Hank: I had to pay for it myself, so don't tell anybody, okay?
Hank Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Callback Hank: You got a very different way of showing your love, don't you?
Larry: I've seen men be burned in dark interiors.
Hank Larry Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Artie: You did have that offer to go on after Nightline, didn't you?
Larry: Fuck no.
Artie Larry Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Top Episodes — The Larry Sanders Show
