Marge and Lisa's plans for a mother-daughter Valentine's Day take a turn when Lisa falls head over heels for an intellectual romantic; Bart and Milhouse investigate Springfield Elementary's legends.
WAR
21.2
Wins Above Replacement
“The Daughter Also Rises” ranks #523 of 552 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 70.1 — Solid. The episode packs 58 scored jokes at 3.8 per minute, averaging 6.7 on craft and 6.0 on impact, with Homer landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Willie: I'm not from Edinburgh! I'm also not from Glasgow! I'm from Kirkwall in Orkney! Me father was an Uppie, and me mother was a Doonie. It tore the family apart!
Willie Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Grampa: Yeah, there's a lot of fish in the sea, but she picked out a drunken walrus.
Grampa Character Comedy Observational Marge · Homer: Last night you had the night terrors. / Yeah, I dreamt I got fired from that job I dreamt I got the night before.
Lisa: This house is not an embarrassment! / Hm, usually when I say something like that, something extremely embarrassing happens. I'm gonna say good night before it does.
Lisa Meta/Self-Referential Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Homer: Hmm, the French have gotten into the wine game? Ha, good luck catchin' up with the big boys.
Homer Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy All Jokes — 58 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Homer: Happy 500th episode! / This is episode 499. / Aw, geez. Well, I got news for ya, Fox ain't doin' this again.
Homer Meta/Self-Referential Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Bart · Homer: How'd you get so many more Valentines? / I got one from Lisa and one from my optometrist. / That's a bill. / No, it's got a love stamp!
Marge · Homer: Last night you had the night terrors. / Yeah, I dreamt I got fired from that job I dreamt I got the night before.
TV Host: Welcome to MythCrackers, where we debunk rumors, legends, and all religions except the Jesus-based ones.
TV Host Dark/Subversive Observational Homer · Marge: Luckily, she doesn't know that our viewing platforms are... multi. / No TV on the computer! / No TV on a smart phone!
MythCrackers hosts: Now, we didn't want to hurt a real cat, so we took this Build-A-Bear carcass... Stuffed it with ballistic gel, shot it with a 20 foot barrel steam cannon... And made a scatter plot of the remains!
MythCrackers hosts: What was it we trying to prove again? / Don't know, don't care!
Bart: That might be a good idea, but then again, you thought it up.
Bart Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Homer: We show girls love on Valentine's Day, and they let us blow stuff up on the Fourth of July. I just pray they never fall on the same day.
Homer Observational Absurdist Homer: You have the most wonderful mom in the world, which is why I have no idea where she is or what she's doing.
Homer Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Moe: I mean, my darling, I was looking at myself in the side view mirror.
Moe Character Comedy Misdirection Marge · Homer: I hope you hit one off the handle and your hands sting! / Ow!
Lisa: Someone's about to put the Thousand Island ladle into the vinaigrette!
Lisa Character Comedy Observational Nick: It was dark, then a light came through the crack. The light was you.
Nick Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Nick: Words are just nails we use to build ideas.
Nick Character Comedy Observational Lisa: Don't panic. This can be separated out. Quick, does anyone have a centrifuge?!
Lisa Escalation Character Comedy Marge: Yep, you're the crack head.
Marge Wordplay/Pun Setup/Punchline Nick: I'll toss this fork into the air and wherever it lands, that's what I'll eat. Hiya!
Nick Absurdist Character Comedy Nick: When I first hear your name, I want to be somewhere important, the peak of Kilimanjaro... the back of a vaporetto in Venice... Lisa! Now this is the most important place in the world.
Nick Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Marge: Now that's a spicy meet-cute! Mwah!
Marge Wordplay/Pun Observational Fat Tony: That cost a nickel, but, uh, we'll settle up later.
Fat Tony Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Milhouse · Bart: Did you invent a robot hand to touch the buttons? / Something like that.
Bart · Milhouse: They were discontinued because they were thought to encourage impressionable children to smoke. / How dumb do they think we are?
Milhouse: I can quit any time I want!
Nick · Lisa: If I cover my peripheral vision, I feel like I'm in France. / How 'bout I just look at you.
Nick: El Puerco, I must break up with you. Oh, but the hand-holding is just too good.
Nick Absurdist Character Comedy Waiter · Nick: Perhaps we can try a little harder, for the lady. / Such is the life of the juice boxiér.
Luann: Would you like to borrow one of my twins? But remember, the one you pick may not be the one you get.
Luann Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Lisa: No excuse, I just forgot all about you.
Lisa Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Marge: Well, if you'd been here for the design phase, you could've registered that objection. Now start quilting!
Marge Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Milhouse: Cool! Now my beauty will be on the outside!
Marge · Lisa: Is it on your father? Little girls always get crushes on their fathers. / Somehow I missed that phase.
Marge: Okay. Let's 'esque' him to dinner.
Marge Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Lisa: This house is not an embarrassment! / Hm, usually when I say something like that, something extremely embarrassing happens. I'm gonna say good night before it does.
Lisa Meta/Self-Referential Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Nick: Well, Lisa didn't tell me that she had a sister. / Or a daughter.
Nick Setup/Punchline Cringe/Discomfort Marge: Well, your arms are lanky. It's kind of a long trip down there.
Marge Observational Deadpan/Understatement Homer: Hmm, the French have gotten into the wine game? Ha, good luck catchin' up with the big boys.
Homer Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Marge: If you do, it'll mean you're a separate person from me. / That'll stop her from seeing him.
Marge Character Comedy Meta/Self-Referential Grampa: Yeah, there's a lot of fish in the sea, but she picked out a drunken walrus.
Grampa Character Comedy Observational Grampa: I don't like to babble on, but I sure do like Babylon.
Grampa Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Parrot: Talk to the wing, Thisbe!
Parrot Wordplay/Pun Meta/Self-Referential Grampa: Let me check my schedule. This might work. I think I'm free. Tuesday's open. You got it, kiddo!
Grampa Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Bart: The one day the lunch lady decides to wash her hands.
Bart Observational Cringe/Discomfort Bart: It's a Twix. / I can't be the guy who killed everybody's fun. That's Skinner's job.
Bart Character Comedy Observational Milhouse: American Girl doll day?! / You might be surprised at the number of boys who have American Girl dolls. It's not weird 'cause they're historic figures.
Milhouse Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Willie: I'm not from Edinburgh! I'm also not from Glasgow! I'm from Kirkwall in Orkney! Me father was an Uppie, and me mother was a Doonie. It tore the family apart!
Willie Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch TV Host: Hola! Yo soy Maury Povich. Uno de estos siete hombres es el verdadero padre de este 'crack baby.'
Officer · Wiggum: Chief, we heard gunfire! / Relax! It's just my back! And my hip. Spinal column!
Cletus: Yeah, I don't normally approve of out-breeding, but you two seem nice.
Cletus Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Homer: Did you say 'ultimate Frisbee'?!
Homer Misdirection Character Comedy Homer: Women and shoes, am I right?
Homer Observational Character Comedy Homer: Women and shoes, am I right?
Homer Observational Setup/Punchline Nick: I sure was-- I'm allergic to chocolate!
Nick Character Comedy Misdirection Ghost: Lisa, it's Hadley Richardson, Hemingway's first wife. Trust me, you're making a big mistake.
Fish: He used to pee in the fireplace!
Fish Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Nick: Lisa, I'm sorry that God gave me this gift of lying to girls, for a little while.
Nick Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Marge: Ooh, you know, I've heard if a fat guy stops moving, he floats.
Marge Observational Deadpan/Understatement Top Episodes — The Simpsons
