Jack learns to appreciate Leap Day while Tracy takes the writers to a restaurant to spend an almost-expired gift card. Liz helps Jenna seduce an internet billionaire.
Absurdist holiday special sustains 2.6 jokes per minute across 57 gags.
Directed by Steve Buscemi · Written by Luke Del Tredici
WAR
129.5
Wins Above Replacement
“Leap Day” ranks #73 of 138 30 Rock episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 97.5 — Elite. The episode packs 78 scored jokes at 3.5 per minute, averaging 7.8 on craft and 7.6 on impact, with Thad landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Kenneth / Spirit of Leap Day: Good. Cry. Let your sadness form a hole inside you that can only be filled with money.
Kenneth: He lives in the Mariana trench. He emerges every four years to trade children's tears for candy.
Kenneth Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Kenneth · Jack (via memo): 'Unfortunately due to the Obama worldwide recession, there will be no Leap Day bonuses this year. Mean laughter, sound of a drink being poured. What are you writing now, you slack-jawed donkey?'
Jenna · Liz: Oh, what's that animal? You know, the one that crosses so slowly across the road and then you swerve to make sure you hit it and then a car coming the other way swerves to avoid you and goes off a cliff. And then that night you and your companion have the greatest sex of your lives because you're both sharing a secret. / It's a turtle, Jenna.
Jenna Liz Character Comedy Escalation Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Kenneth: Please get better, sir. I've dug too many graves.
Kenneth Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 78 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Thad: I've had my skin tags removed since then so you can see my eyes now.
Thad Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Thad: Thank you, no everyone thinks of the young Nazi boy as the star of that show.
Thad Irony/Sarcasm Deadpan/Understatement Thad: A lot of people didn't realize that was the free, unlicensed version.
Thad Deadpan/Understatement Absurdist Jenna · Liz · Jenna: Hey, Liz, new Bluetooth? / No, I'm talking to someone. / I'm sorry. I don't see people that look like that.
Liz: That was this creep I went to college with. Such a nerd. And this is coming from someone who wrote lyrics to the song the cantina band plays in Star Wars.
Liz Character Comedy Observational Liz: No, that was sad Thad the skintag lad. I coined that.
Liz Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Callback Jenna: I don't know a lot about business, but he did an Internet and now the computers like him and Wall Street is Google.
Jenna Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Jenna: Liz, I'm on a sexual walkabout right now. I need to know if anything can make me happier than being with Paul. And maybe $20 billion would do it.
Jenna Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Kenneth · Pete: Poke your eye, pull your hair, you forgot what clothes to wear.
Kenneth: He lives in the Mariana trench. He emerges every four years to trade children's tears for candy.
Kenneth Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Liz: But white haven was founded by the Amish, and we really only celebrated their holidays. After high school, I went on rumspringa. It was crazy. I totally snuck into The Witches of Eastwick.
Liz Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Jack · Jack: Certainly not at a Michael's crafts crafting cruise. / Miss Lemon, you are missing out.
Jack Jack Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Jack: For instance, I am wearing a braided necklace with a shark's tooth on it. I listened to rap music for the first time. Not a fan.
Jack Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Liz: Okay, fine, I'll go, but if he has a giant chandelier in his house, I'm out. Those things fall.
Liz Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Pete: It's not such a big deal in Boston, either. Just a Leap Day William parade, citywide ice maze and we don't poke you in the eye if you're not wearing yellow and blue. We just stomp on your foot. Kick you in the knee, Yankees suck, go Pats.
Pete Absurdist Character Comedy Running Gag Pete: Uptight lawyer Dave Williams turns into the real Leap Day William after an ice fishing trip gone awry. USA runs an all-day marathon.
Pete Absurdist Meta/Self-Referential ★ Rewatch Movie character · Movie character: Dave, is everything all right? / I definitely don't have gills. I mean, nothing. I mean, yes.
Cerie: Oh, my God, that's what Chris kept quoting this morning during our love... making.
Cerie Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Kenneth: Gabe's got the week off. He's a Mormon. You know how they are about Leap Day.
Kenneth Absurdist Deadpan/Understatement Jack: Fine, I didn't wanna have to do this, but I am wearing yellow and blue.
Jack Character Comedy Visual Gag Jack: Well, certainly you remember the joy that fills a young boy's heart on the day of leap.
Jack Character Comedy Absurdist Jack: Because it's an extra day to do business. A bonus profit opportunity. I have a bet with my business school roommates every four years to see who can make the most money on Leap Day.
Jack Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Jack: It'll be like those Bible quotes are right in your face.
Jack Absurdist Character Comedy Kenneth: Of course, take off my bald cap. Not put on my wig.
Kenneth Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Liz: Well, he's definitely rich. [Liz surveying the apartment]
Liz Deadpan/Understatement Visual Gag Jenna · Liz: Oh, what's that animal? You know, the one that crosses so slowly across the road and then you swerve to make sure you hit it and then a car coming the other way swerves to avoid you and goes off a cliff. And then that night you and your companion have the greatest sex of your lives because you're both sharing a secret. / It's a turtle, Jenna.
Jenna Liz Character Comedy Escalation Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Thad · Thad: We really gotta get all the furniture out of here? My aquarium guy's coming to see about turning this whole room into an aquarium. / Who's really in the aquarium? The fish or us?
Kenneth · Jack (via memo): 'Unfortunately due to the Obama worldwide recession, there will be no Leap Day bonuses this year. Mean laughter, sound of a drink being poured. What are you writing now, you slack-jawed donkey?'
Tray/Tracy · Tracy · Tray · Tracy: A $50,000 Benihana gift card? / Right, I did an ad and insisted on being paid in Beni Bucks. / No sir, this card is only good through February 2012. / Any other year it'd be March already. But we found it today! It's a Leap Day miracle!
Tracy: Nothing's impossible on Leap Day. It's like I said in my cameo appearance in Leap Dave Williams: 'Gimme your wallet, old man!'
Tracy Meta/Self-Referential Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Narrator/Chyron · Jack: Following an unintentionally racist press conference... Help us to 'Whip' the competition. Kabletown shares down sharply...
Kenneth · Kenneth · Jack: Careful, sir, those leaves are poisonous. / You know the saying, 'rhubarb red, eat away, rhubarb green, don't eat them.' / Kenneth, I've watched Newt Gingrich eat a plate of ribs. I think my stomach can handle some rhubarb leaves.
Kenneth: One of my birds is sick and I want to get home in time to baptize her.
Jack: Now, would you watch a television show... And I'm just spitballing here... Called Spitball?
Jack Character Comedy Meta/Self-Referential Jack: Sherry, I'm afraid something has come up at work and you'll have to stay late with Liddy. Just dab some scotch on your neck and make your eyes the color of a winter crystal so she'll think you're me.
Jack Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Thad: It's my, uh, D&D room. The gaming table comes up out of the floor. / Table! / Frak, I'm supposed to say 'floor' first.
Thad Character Comedy Physical/Slapstick ★ Rewatch Thad: I have been in love with you since college. Watching you every night on that stage and realizing my dad was wrong. I do like girls.
Thad Character Comedy Misdirection Thad: That is why it's called Xaro. In Game of Thrones, Xaro is a rich merchant prince who wishes to acquaint himself with the mother of dragons.
Thad Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Liz: Great, well... Scooby Doo! [Liz runs away]
Liz Character Comedy Reaction Beat Thad · Thad · Thad · Liz · Thad · Liz · Thad: Liz, wait! $10 million! / I want you to take my virginity on leap night for $10 million. / Fine, 20. / No, Thad, I... / Don't answer yet. I mean, okay, unless you were gonna say yes. / No, you heard me say no. / Don't answer yet. / Don't answer yet.
Thad Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dotcom · Tracy: Mr. Jordan, you'll never spend all this by midnight. You appeared in that ad for nothing. / Well, the joke's on you because that commercial never aired for unexplained reasons.
Thad: I just touched the table again. God, you call for help! I'll just put my head on the table for a second.
Thad Character Comedy Physical/Slapstick Callback Liz: You know, I just kept seeing your face. Also, I have too much dignity.
Liz Character Comedy Misdirection Criss · Liz: So another woman? / Victoria's Secret model.
Jenna · Criss: It's Leap Day. Real life is for March. / Nothing that happens on Leap Day counts.
Jenna: It looks like we've got a slut-off on our hands.
Jenna Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Writer · Tracy · Writer · Dotcom: We've only spent $6000. We should just give up. / Never. / We can't keep eating! / Lutz's shirt button popped off and hit Cerie. It counts as us touching.
Tracy · Dotcom: Everybody's always telling me not to get paid in gift cards. Angie, my lawyer, my imaginary friend, Dotcom. / Tray, I'm real. I moved your furniture.
Tracy Dotcom Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Tracy · Dotcom · Tracy · Tracy · Dotcom · Tracy: One Leap Day when I was a kid, the Harlem River froze, and I decided to cross it carrying my brick collection. / I told him not to. / No one can hear you, Dotcom. / Then I fell through the ice. They still don't know who pulled me out. / I did. / Charlie Rangel gave me a medal.
Thad: You're famous. I have screen grabs of all your nip s.
Thad Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Jenna · Thad · Jenna: What was the dance that Rolf did for Liesl? Did it go like this? / Yes. / That's it. That's how Rolf danced.
Jenna: Right now, there are models waking up from their coke binges, multi-ethnic bartenders with daddy issues, former ballerinas who had to quit because their boobs got too big. They're gonna hear about the horny billionaire, and Thad's gonna forget all about his little crush. They're coming, Liz. Click click. That's their stilettos. Click click.
Jenna Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Kenneth: Please get better, sir. I've dug too many graves.
Kenneth Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Old Man · Kenneth: Why the long face, son? / I do have a long, elegant face, thank you, but I can't enjoy your compliment, because I'm sad.
Old Man · Kenneth: I reckon you may be right. Leap Day William's probably just a tall tale told to kids to help sell candy. But this old fool still believes he exists, right here, inside all of us. / I am always coughing up blood. Could that be Leap Day William trying to get out?
Kenneth · Old Man: Thanks. Nice costume, by the way. / Right, costume.
Liz · Thad: So, what should we do now? / Stop pressuring me. What are you? An intercourse monster?
Liz Thad Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Thad · Liz: Is sex like when the Na'vi intertwine their hair braids? / Sure. Yeah, Thad, that's exactly what it's like.
Thad Liz Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Liz: Aw, damn it. Hot bitches. [Models arrive]
Liz Character Comedy Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch Callback Jack · Kenneth: Kenneth, is that me? / I'm not Kenneth. I'm the spirit of Leap Day. Welcome to your Leap Day past.
Jack Kenneth Meta/Self-Referential Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Young Jack (vision): Jackie, we can't go to the parade today. I got called into work... at the hospital... where I'm a nurse.
Kenneth / Spirit of Leap Day: Good. Cry. Let your sadness form a hole inside you that can only be filled with money.
Jack's mother (vision): Of course we're going to the parade today, Jackie. But you can't have candy and cigarettes without a few tears first.
Jack: When did we stop giving children cigarettes? It's the liberal war on Leap Day.
Jack Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Kenneth · Sherry the Nanny: Welcome to Leap Day present. / Okay, I'll change my eye color, but it seems like a waste of voodoo.
Jack · Kenneth: Five leap days from now. That's Liddy. I assume this is her horse stable and that she's hammering that nail as a funny joke. / No, Mr. Donaghy. She's doing Habitat for Humanity. After you missed all her leap days, she started experimenting with liberalism.
Jack Kenneth Character Comedy Escalation Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Jack · Kenneth · Jack: Kenneth, I want you to go to Citarella and buy the biggest rhubarb there is. The one that's as big as me, sir? That's the one. But first, you take Rebecca Birdstein to the vet.
Jack · Kenneth · Jack: What a Mitzvah. / Merry Leap Day, sir. / Merry Leap Day to us all!
Thad · Liz · Thad: Liz, why don't you go and... Get you and Karolina some drinks? / Okay, fine. / Looks like this time the male will be in the Czech. That kind of wit is a thing she will never give you.
Karolina (model): Hey, Liz. A gym teacher on a sex tour of Indonesia called. He wants his shirt back.
Liz: Okay, that's solid, Kurkova. That's a good burn.
Liz Reaction Beat Character Comedy Callback Tracy · Tracy · Dotcom · Tracy · Tracy: Remember where I came from. / But we all came from the sea. Sea? Like the letter 'C', which is part of the alphabet. Alphabet soup. Soup kitchen. Kitchen... / No, no, don't keep going. / The kitchen debate with Richard Nixon. Richard M. Nixon. The M-train. Soul train. Chicken soup for the soul. Chicken soup. Soup kitchen. / This is a Leap Day miracle!
Tracy: Merry Leap Day, tourists. / Merry Leap Day, closeted gay guys meeting in the city.
Tracy Character Comedy Observational Criss · Liz · Criss · Liz · Tracy: Seriously, 20 million bucks? I would sleep with Thad Warmald for that. / Couldn't go through with it. You know, I just kept seeing your face. Also, I have too much dignity. / So another woman? / Victoria's Secret model. / Feast, homeless, feast!
Tracy: I saved Leap Day! And connected with my son! And I solved the big case from earlier!
Tracy Character Comedy Absurdist Meta/Self-Referential ★ Rewatch Narrator/Kenneth: Well, I guess we all learned something tonight about love and friendship, about taking chances, about the true meaning of Leap Day. But these lessons aren't good just for every four years. No, they're good every year. Because we should live every day as if it's Leap Day, and every Leap Day as if it's your last.
Narrator/Kenneth: And if you should ever see an old man in a blue suit busting out of the middle of the ocean, take the time to say howdy. It might just be worth your while.
