Chaos reigns as the eighth anniversary show tapes and Larry tries repeatedly to sneak in a bathroom visit during a commercial break.
WAR
88.9
Wins Above Replacement
“Eight” ranks #56 of 90 The Larry Sanders Show episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 85.9 — Elite. The episode packs 75 scored jokes at 2.2 per minute, averaging 7.3 on craft and 7.1 on impact, with Larry landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Larry: Larry: 'I used to have a trough under here, and someone has taken it.'
Larry Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Larry: I suggest that you don't constantly look to the right.
Larry · Rosie O'Donnell: Larry: 'We saved the best for last.' Rosie: 'That is so sweet.' Then he immediately leaves the couch.
Larry: 'This carpet can't take any more ur...' — Larry cuts himself off before finishing 'urine', implying he has wet himself or is about to
Larry Running Gag Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Callback Rosie: It's that insertion around the side to loosen the... and the mother was crying, being... Look at all the men crunching over.
All Jokes — 75 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Artie: Oh, damn it, Phil, how many times do I have to tell you, the shrimp are for guests?
Artie Phil Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Artie: Fat-free snackwells in the kitchenette. Get away from those shrimp, damn it, you bottomless pit.
Hank: Don't expect anything from me during the kd lang segment tonight.
Artie: I don't. I never do.
Larry Artie Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Hank: She did nothing, so I told her to go fuck herself.
Artie: Well, so far, there's no surprise there.
Larry: And that, by the way, is a milestone we never reached with any of our wives.
Larry: You speak for yourself, Artie. I have some great clips from my last marriage.
Artie: What about the monkey grabbing your nuts? That's a classy one.
Hank Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Artie: So I'm to assume Mandy patinkin is only on tonight so you can get good seats for the next sondheim fuck fest at the Hollywood bowl?
Artie: I'm getting seats right behind home plate. Get a foul tip.
Artie: You're expecting a lull?
Larry: Lull? Who said lull? I said Phil. Phil!
Artie Character Comedy Absurdist Artie: Lorenzo is the stupidest driver in history. He's supposed to pick up rosie o'Donnell. He picks up Chris o'Donnell and takes him to the rose bowl.
Artie Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Rosie: I had to park 3 miles away, next to the day players from the Jeff foxworthy show.
Artie Setup/Punchline Absurdist ★ Rewatch Artie: Oh, yeah? Well, you could try.
Rosie: Still more.
Artie: I'll kill myself and all others like me. Perfect.
Rosie: I thought you were gonna have me change right here in the hallway.
kd lang: Didn't recognize you without your chain saw.
kd lang Hank Setup/Punchline Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Callback kd lang: I've always enjoyed bleeding from my ears.
Hank Irony/Sarcasm Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch kd lang: You still vacuum in the nude? Why don't you get some blinds for that glass door, you sick fuck?
Hank: It kind of turns you on, though, doesn't it?
kd lang Hank Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Callback Larry: it seems longer than 8, doesn't it?
Larry: Does it seem like 8 to you, Hank?
Hank: Yes.
Larry: I never get tired of you, and the sex is as fresh as ever.
Larry Setup/Punchline Character Comedy Larry: I think the reason is is because we have no expectations and it is always a surprise when it happens.
Larry Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Larry: Larry's Clinton joke: Clinton saw the million man march and said 'please, please take whatever you want. Just don't hurt my family.'
Larry Setup/Punchline Irony/Sarcasm Larry: Bill Clinton saw them out there and opened his door up and said 'please, please take whatever you want. Just don't hurt my family.'
Rosie: You know, what is wrong with him? I mean, how scared is he? It's a talk show. You'd think the man could just talk, all right?
Rosie: he's playing golf again. Evidently, he believes the real killer is somewhere on the back 9.
He evidently got a triple-bogey on one of the holes, and tried to blame it on a Colombian drug lord.
You're upset because nobody watches your show.
Artie: Noah... noah, you're acting like a fucking 2-year-old.
Noah Wyle Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Larry: Yeah. I told you I should have peed before I went on.
Rosie: I'm quick. I'll be sitting, but I'm quick on my ass.
Artie Larry Running Gag Deadpan/Understatement Callback Larry: We had that when we had Chuck grodin on.
Artie Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Callback Larry: We've been on 8 years.
Mandy: How long has Chicago hope been on?
Larry: We, uh, we're going in... this is our second year.
Larry: That is Mandy, uh, thinking.
Larry: I'm going to ask you to tell me about your circumcision because I... Could tell from the way you're pushing this cd that you've had one.
Larry: I've had 8. they keep going back for more, and frankly it is to the point now where it is whittled down to nothing.
Rosie: My brand-new $42,000 acura legend has a big Dent in it. Why, you might ask, do I have my own car here on the lot parked 3 miles away? Because the limo didn't show up! So farrah fawcett decided to hit my new car!
Larry Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Artie: Oh, Jesus, he's doing the potty dance. Get a clamp.
Larry: I've never used the phrase 'inter-medical' before.
Larry: I suggest that you don't constantly look to the right.
Fred: Johnny wanted me to tell you how much he enjoys your show.
Artie: Don't you need to drain your lizard?
Artie Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Larry: What else did Johnny have to say?
Fred: Uh, nothing about you.
Larry: Clear the hallways, 'cause my dick is going to be out, and it's going to be spraying.
Larry Artie Physical/Slapstick Running Gag ★ Rewatch Callback Fred: Thanks very much, but you haven't seen my lungs.
Artie Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Larry: Somebody's in here.
Larry Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Fred: I'm sorry, but this takes a lot longer than it used to.
Farrah: I just nicked her car. You know, the morons at the gate are making such a big deal about this.
Larry Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Farrah Fawcett: I just nicked her car. You know, the morons at the gate are making such a big deal about this.
George Segal: I'm going.
Larry: Wait, wait. No, no, no. Just take it...
Larry: Did he get circumcised?
Rosie: Yes, he did, in fact. I was listening.
Rosie: It's that insertion around the side to loosen the... and the mother was crying, being... Look at all the men crunching over.
Rosie: Listen to me, Larry, a real man can hold his urine, OK?
Larry: This carpet can't take any more ur--
Larry Running Gag Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Callback Larry: This is the best anniversary show we've ever done.
Larry Artie Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Larry · Fred de Cordova: Larry, mid-kd lang performance, rushes to the bathroom — finds Fred de Cordova already inside. De Cordova: 'Somebody's in here.' 'This takes a lot longer than it used to.'
Farrah Fawcett · Ryan O'Neal · Larry: Farrah Fawcett confronts Rosie O'Donnell over the car incident. Farrah: 'I just nicked her car.' Ryan O'Neal shows up and is hostile to Larry because Larry bumped him from the show.
Farrah Fawcett · Larry: Farrah Fawcett to Larry: 'You sure smell good.' Larry: 'I've got to take a piss.'
Ryan O'Neal · Larry: Ryan O'Neal: 'You're Irish, you've never been able to [kick my ass].'
Pat O'Brien · Larry: Pat O'Brien anecdote: 'I forgot my own name. We were doing the final 4...' — ends with producers feeding him 'you're Pat O'Brien' in his earpiece
Farrah Fawcett · Larry: If there's a problem with my car, 'you can take me home, right?' Larry: 'I've got to take a piss.' — Farrah Fawcett asks for a ride home and Larry's entire response is his bladder.
Pat O'Brien · Larry: Pat O'Brien story: He forgot his own name on air. In his ear: 'You're Pat O'Brien. You're Pat O'Brien.' Larry: 'Did you say finally, I'm the big fella?'
Rosie O'Donnell: Rosie enters after all the other guests: 'I'm finally out here. Jeez. A little crowded over here. It was like forever. I thought I'd never get out.'
Larry · Rosie O'Donnell: Larry: 'We saved the best for last.' Rosie: 'That is so sweet.' Then he immediately leaves the couch.
Larry · Rosie O'Donnell: Larry asks Rosie if her adopted baby got circumcised. Rosie: 'Yes. He had a bris.' Larry: 'So you used the mohel.'
Larry · Rosie O'Donnell: Larry to Rosie on-air: 'Is your baby... I know you adopted him and all, but did he get circumcised?' Rosie: 'Yes, he did, in fact. I was listening.' — callback to the Mandy circumcision bit
Rosie O'Donnell: Rosie describes the bris in graphic detail: 'it's that insertion around the side to loosen the... and the mother was crying...' as all the men on the couch visibly cringe.
Larry · Rosie O'Donnell: Larry: 'I have to go to the bathroom. I have to stop the tape.' Rosie: 'You're going to stop the show? I just got here.'
Larry: Larry: 'I used to have a trough under here, and someone has taken it.'
Larry Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Rosie O'Donnell: Rosie: 'A real man can hold his urine, OK? That's all I have to say.'
Larry: Larry: 'Don't make me laugh. I'm going to wet my pants.'
Larry Character Comedy Escalation Callback Larry: Larry: 'I used to have a trough under here, and someone has taken it.'
Larry Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Larry: Larry: 'This carpet can't take any more ur...'
Larry Dark/Subversive Misdirection ★ Rewatch Callback PA: A PA appears with a pair of pants: 'Somebody said you needed a pair of pants.'
PA Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Larry: 'This carpet can't take any more ur...' — Larry cuts himself off before finishing 'urine', implying he has wet himself or is about to
Larry Running Gag Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Callback Larry · Artie: Episode ends: Artie: 'What an embarrassment.' Larry: 'Good night, everybody. This is the best anniversary show we've ever done.'
Larry Artie Irony/Sarcasm Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Top Episodes — The Larry Sanders Show