Homer becomes depressed when he sees that Ned Flanders seems to be better off than him. To remedy this, he begins to pray constantly. Meanwhile, the Simpsons discover that tree roots have clogged up their plumbing. The house becomes too run down to live in, and Homer prays for a solution. Homer is injured while attending church; he sues Reverend Lovejoy and is awarded the deed to the church. He throws a huge house-warming party, in which all of the partiers drink and engage in sinful activities. It suddenly starts raining and the town begins to flood. The townspeople flee to the roof of the church. Homer tries praying again but the flood keeps rising. Reverend Lovejoy returns in a helicopter and leads everyone in prayer, asking God to forgive them, and the rain stops.
WAR
49.6
Wins Above Replacement
“Pray Anything” ranks #303 of 552 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 77.8 — Great. The episode packs 67 scored jokes at 3.5 per minute, averaging 6.9 on craft and 6.6 on impact, with Homer landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Homer: I am reminded of Colonel Sanders who is now seated at your right hand...shoveling popcorn chicken into thy mouth.
Homer Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer: Lord, please use your space-age clog-busting powers on this stubborn drain...then take some time off for yourself. Fly to France, have dinner.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Homer: Oh, merciful God...who has blessed mankind with two kinds of clam chowder...help me find the remote.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Homer · Event Staff · Homer: Can't we just pretend you're really a girl? / Well, for how long? / For the rest of our lives.
Marge: That's because you keep passing out on our lawn.
Marge Setup/Punchline Character Comedy ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 67 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Homer: Yeah. Well, nachos are nachos.
Homer Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Bart: Whoa, check out Janeane Giraffalo.
Bart Wordplay/Pun Observational Homer: Szechwan, eh? No wonder she's so spicy. [GROWLS]
Homer Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Marge: Bart, you're a little young to be growling at 7-foot Chinese ladies.
Marge Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Lisa: She showed little girls everywhere that they can grow up to be 6'5".
Lisa Observational Irony/Sarcasm Lisa Leslie · Fan · Lisa Leslie: I think you mean I have game. Try to speak correctly. / You go, girl. / Yes, I will depart lest your bad grammar rub off on me.
Announcer: Now, here's something for the men to dribble over.
Homer: Oh, I can see her logo and everything.
Homer Character Comedy Visual Gag ★ Rewatch Homer: Oh, darn it. Swish was everything I'm not. Put the head back on.
Homer Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Bart: The Cowgirls versus The She-gles. Heh.
Bart Wordplay/Pun Observational Homer: Oh, sure. Speed walking, ballroom dancing...rhythmic gymnastics, extreme choir.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation Homer · Event Staff · Homer: Can't we just pretend you're really a girl? / Well, for how long? / For the rest of our lives.
Ned Flanders: I'm donating this whole check to Bibles for Belgians.
Team Owner: I'm crazy as a crap-house rat for philanthropy.
Ned Flanders: That cuts the mustard with me.
Homer: Oh, it's not fair. I always wanted to drive a food-shaped car.
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Homer: How come all the good things happen to Jesus H. Nice? By which I mean Flanders.
Homer Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Marge: That's because you keep passing out on our lawn.
Marge Setup/Punchline Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Ned Flanders: and flossing my teeth, tail and toes.
Ken Burns: They so consumed my life...I never had time for a proper haircut.
Homer: Oh, merciful God...who has blessed mankind with two kinds of clam chowder...help me find the remote.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Ken Burns: I've never actually been to a baseball game. The fresh air gives me hives.
Homer: From now on, I'll pray till my hands are chapped and bleeding.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation Homer: Oh, Lord. Please guide that diaper into someone's schnoz.
Homer Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Homer: Vengeful God, loving God. Vengeful God, loving God.
Homer Character Comedy Visual Gag ★ Rewatch Carl: Whose banana you gotta peel to get a 5.9? Pfft!
Carl Wordplay/Pun Observational Homer: I am reminded of Colonel Sanders who is now seated at your right hand...shoveling popcorn chicken into thy mouth.
Homer Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer: Move over, eggs. Bacon just got a new best friend: fudge.
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Marge: Homer, God isn't some kind of holy concierge.
Marge Setup/Punchline Character Comedy Homer: Lord, please use your space-age clog-busting powers on this stubborn drain...then take some time off for yourself. Fly to France, have dinner.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Homer: Marge, he's way the hell up there.
Homer Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Plumber: Your pipes have more roots than the list of all time top-rated TV shows.
Plumber: You was hiding behind the drywall. Yes, you were. I'm glad social services didn't see this. Yes, I am.
Plumber Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Homer: If you could fix my house...or make a new house from one of my ribs.
Homer Character Comedy Meta/Self-Referential Larry H. Lawyer Jr.: I'm Larry H. Lawyer, Junior. And I will fight for you. I also habla Español.
Homer: I couldn't help it. Those pews are so comfortable.
Homer Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Testimonial Client: He got me $60,000. And I was driving drunk in a graveyard.
Ned Flanders: It's his skull. It's hypnotic.
Judge: She was run over by a clergyman.
Judge Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement Jury: Ha, ha, Your Honor, we the jury find that to be America's Funniest Home Video. Back to you, Bob Saget.
Jury Meta/Self-Referential Jury Foreman: Ha, ha, Your Honor, we the jury find that to be America's Funniest Home Video. Back to you, Bob Saget.
Church Lawyer: We're not a synagogue.
Homer: He's not giving it to me. God is because I prayed for it.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation Lisa · Homer: Dad, I think this might be the work of Satan. / It's all good.
Lisa Homer Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Lisa: Aw, he thinks he's papal.
Lisa Wordplay/Pun Visual Gag AA Member: If it weren't for Alcoholics Anonymous...I'd still be sucking the juice out of glow sticks.
AA Member: Saint Pauli Girl's Cathedral.
Homer: by throwing the bitchingest beer bash this church has ever seen.
Homer Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Carl · Lenny: Wow, Homer, this is like a party Dick Clark would throw. Yeah. Fun, but not too fun.
Carl · Homer: Wow, Homer, this is like a party Dick Clark would throw. / Yeah. Fun, but not too fun.
Reverend Lovejoy: Dr. Hibbert, must you play the claw machine?
Marge: Particularly the part about the pin in the gutter on lane 15.
Reverend Lovejoy: There's no place for me here.
Reverend Lovejoy: It looks like God has packed up and left Springfield.
Arnie Pie: Do I have a magic lens that can see into people's souls? Well, yours would be black, Kent. Black as the ace of spades.
Comic Book Guy: Would you believe a pigeon stuffed with Spam? A rat filled with cough drops?
Carl · Homer: CARL: Hey, Lenny, covet some more chili fries? That's it. The whole shebang.
Ned: Speaking in tongues, what great kids.
Moe · Barney: Ha, ha, read them and strip, Barn. Uh-uh-uh-uh. Slowly. Make me forget my troubles.
Barney · Homer: Yeah, and some of them's gotta be chicks. Yeah, with, like, a thousand boobs.
Barney: On Dasher, on Dancer. Man, I must be wasted.
Barney Character Comedy Observational Homer: Thank you, God. Now, turn the rainwater into wine.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation Ned Flanders: Hey, hey, hey. Cut that out.
Mob · Mob Member: Yeah. I say we skin him alive and set him on fire. / Yeah, that'll appease God.
Reverend Lovejoy: They were misled by a demon in blue pants.
Lisa · Buddha: I don't know. Buddha? Hey, they've suffered enough.
God: Keep that popcorn chicken coming, colonel.
God Callback Absurdist ★ Rewatch Callback Top Episodes — The Simpsons
