Homer blows off Marge to buy a lottery ticket and winds up winning the million-dollar jackpot. Fearing how Marge will react if she finds out the reason Homer missed their date, Homer keeps his newly inherited fortune a secret and spoils his family with “anonymous” gifts. When Bart finds out, he and Homer spend the money like it’s going out of style, including buying front-row to tickets to see Coldplay in concert.
WAR
36.5
Wins Above Replacement
“Million Dollar Maybe” ranks #348 of 552 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 76.6 — Great. The episode packs 48 scored jokes at 2.8 per minute, averaging 7.0 on craft and 6.5 on impact, with Homer landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Barney: That's right! I bought the winning ticket! And now I can buy back all the blood I sold!
Barney Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Lenny: I just go around saying that, in the hope it'll be applicable.
Lenny Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Grandpa: Wait, I'm shooting at nazis? That's not how I remember it.
Grandpa Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Grandpa: I miss the history channel, damn it! How else would I know what I lived through?
Grandpa Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Sideshow Bob: Soon you will be mi...
All Jokes — 48 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Lisa: Can I just ask, who the hell says po-tah-to?
Lisa Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer: our toast will do just what it's supposed to: Steal focus from the bride.
Homer Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Bart: Why is everyone staring at static?
Grandpa: I miss the history channel, damn it! How else would I know what I lived through?
Grandpa Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Marge: Here's all the money we would've given to televangelists.
Marge Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Smithers: Sir, your cheeks are ruddy! Did you eat a sugar cube when I wasn't watching?
Smithers Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Grandpa: Wait, I'm shooting at nazis? That's not how I remember it.
Grandpa Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer: She's not my girlfriend. She's a girl who I married, who used to be my friend.
Homer Character Comedy Observational Homer: Wow! That's exactly what I'm enjoying right now! Spooky.
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist Ned: My faith in the lord. It came back!
Ned Character Comedy Callback Apu: according to the only honest newspaper: The Beijing daily worker.
Apu Irony/Sarcasm Observational Homer: Hey, any part of a cookie you can't eat is just a waste of time.
Homer Character Comedy Observational Homer: Please be compact. Please be compact!
Homer Escalation Character Comedy Homer Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Homer: Maybe it'll speed up if I make 'oh, can you believe this' noises.
Homer Observational Meta/Self-Referential ★ Rewatch Wedding Officiant: because my vows, apparently, weren't good enough.
Dave · Lisa: like Mad Men, season two! I give it a year.
Conductor: He's strangling me! I'm gonna choke!
Homer: No time to pretend we're friends! Lotto me!
Homer Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Chief Wiggum: Someone going that fast has no time for a ticket.
Wedding Guests: Who's there? I don't know.
Wedding Guest: Don't drag your kid into this!
Sideshow Bob: Soon you will be mi...
Homer: A million dollars! Now I'm really glad I didn't die!
Homer Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Homer: Oh, I'm rich and I can't even tell my own wife!
Homer Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Barney: That's right! I bought the winning ticket! And now I can buy back all the blood I sold!
Barney Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Government Official: This money will go to partially cover the cost of a study to decide what to do with the money.
Magic Mirror: My advice is to buy hitler's baseball.
Homer: Here I am a millionaire, and I can't even help the woman who gave birth to me.
Homer Character Comedy Misdirection ★ Rewatch Homer: It's where I hide my adult magazines.
Homer Character Comedy Misdirection Grandpa: Look at me! I'm big bill tilden!
Grandpa Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Grandpa: I think I'm looking at a poop later.
Grandpa Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Homer · Bart: You threw it, you go find it. Why, you little... There's a big box in here!
Homer: Not as much money as there used to be.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation Homer: I should've been acting like rest-of-the-year Jerry Lewis.
Homer Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Lenny: I just go around saying that, in the hope it'll be applicable.
Lenny Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Barney: I just go around saying that, in the hope it'll be applicable.
Barney Character Comedy Meta/Self-Referential ★ Rewatch Homer: I said someone like me, I didn't say me.
Homer Character Comedy Misdirection Homer: I'm gonna call you benson and hedges 'cause you're gettin' smoked!
Homer Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Retirement Home Residents: Tell me what my name is! Take away my roommate! He's dead!
Homer: Blackmail your father in space, will you?!
Homer Escalation Absurdist ★ Rewatch Homer: You'd think it'd be dishwasher safe, but it wasn't.
Homer Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Nursing Home Worker: Don't forget the low pay and the constant presence of death.
Marge: At least that's what the letter said. ENJAY! THE GUMMINT
Marge Character Comedy Observational Bart: Evolve! Evolve! Get religious about a bird you see! Sprain your ankle and know it's a death sentence!
Bart Observational Escalation ★ Rewatch Milhouse: Okay, but just 'cause I'm your best friend, don't be afraid to use that whip.
Milhouse Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Marge: We've got a million dollars?! Screw the toast!
Marge Character Comedy Misdirection Callback Marge: I didn't know you could rent a balloon.
Marge Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Top Episodes — The Simpsons
