Lisa dates a competitive eater; Bart benefits from helping convict Snake Jailbird escape from a jam.
WAR
23.4
Wins Above Replacement
“Luca” ranks #531 of 552 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 69.4 — Mixed. The episode packs 71 scored jokes at 3.6 per minute, averaging 6.5 on craft and 6.2 on impact, with Homer landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Lou · Wiggum: But Chief, we got guns; he's got a little wrench. / It's cold!
Homer: I'm sleeping on Flanders' couch tonight. Ours is crap.
Homer Character Comedy Misdirection Homer · Lucas: Are you calling me not fat? / Maybe you just haven't found the right food, huh?
Barney: It'll be nice to let someone else decide when I drink-- too much pressure.
Barney Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Snake · Chief Wiggum · Snake · Chief Wiggum: If I get caught, it's suicide by cop. / Oh, I don't like the sound of that. / It means I get you to shoot me, dude. / Yeah, still sounds like a lot of paperwork.
All Jokes — 71 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Homer: Like most of my problems, it all started at Moe's...
Homer Observational Character Comedy Barney: It'll be nice to let someone else decide when I drink-- too much pressure.
Barney Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Moe: Not 'sauce,' 'source.' Source! S-A-U-R-C-E!
Moe Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Kent Brockman: We have heard from a very reliable sauce news involving multiple senators
Moe: Hmm? Oh, damn, the plaster's flaking again.
Moe Visual Gag Deadpan/Understatement Homer Physical/Slapstick Irony/Sarcasm Homer: Oh, the only way out is in! Hey, look at me! I'm going up a slide!
Homer Physical/Slapstick Absurdist Barney · Moe: Don't worry, Homer, I'll call the cops! / I'll write my senator. / Senator! Senator!
Homer: Oh, am I gonna die on a playground, like some uncoordinated child?
Homer Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Homer: But I did learn something from all this: the sprinklers in this park come on at 3:00 a.m.
Homer Misdirection Deadpan/Understatement Bart · Lisa · Homer: Don't want to be seen with you when you're hitting bottom. / At least we hope it's bottom. / Don't worry, it's bottom, all right.
Willie · Skinner: What about the one your ma used on you? / It, uh, broke on my buttocks.
Willie: Serves you right for eating jam straight out of the jar.
Skinner: Damn it! That's not even a swivel chair.
Skinner: Skate, skate as fast as you can. But I'll catch you-- I'm the Principal Man!
Skinner Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Skinner: That's the kind of education you're missing.
Skinner Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Bart: The one place my car can't go.
Bart Observational Character Comedy Lucas · Lucas: Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go. / Uh, P.S. Your car is totaled.
Snake: Well, I can't have cops sniffing around here. Some of them might be girls.
Snake Character Comedy Absurdist Snake: I always thought that if I'd had braces, I'd have smiled more.
Snake Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Snake Character Comedy Callback Callback Bart: You can't buy me with a candy bar that has coconut.
Bart Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Chief Wiggum: Eddie! Prepare my litter! Lou, you are responsible for my oxygen, food, water and cleaning! You have to clean me. I clean you. Yeah.
Bart · Snake · Bart: Stolen bowling shoes, 3-D glasses, Krusty standee and this 'cage' for my pet. / What do you feed him? / My A.D.D. meds.
Homer · Snake: I'm busy that night. / Yeah, lucky you.
Bart: What record? Stupidest death?
Bart Setup/Punchline Dark/Subversive Lucas · Bart: That's French for 'hello.' / Actually, I think it...
Bart: A fat kid with a dream? I can't compete with that.
Bart Observational Character Comedy Lucas: All the glamour foods: pizza, boiled eggs, chicken wings and the big enchilada, which is not enchiladas but hot dogs.
Lucas Misdirection Absurdist Lucas: That's gonna hurt coming out.
Lucas Setup/Punchline Cringe/Discomfort Bart: I won't be using the correct term then.
Bart Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Bart · Bart: He's just Ralph with a dream. / The dream of not ralphing.
Bart Bart Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Lisa: But I'm sure I could totally change and fix him.
Lisa Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Lisa: Where's the gift receipt? Where's the packet of desiccant that says 'Do not eat'? And, believe me, you shouldn't.
Lisa Escalation Observational Bart · Lisa · Bart: You can't spell 'crime' without 'me.' / C-R-I... / There it is, at the end!
Lucas: It's pronounced 'Luca-dollar.' That's my competition name.
Lucas Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Homer · Marge: Then that makes me the Jackie Robinson of the sport, and you are the racist Philadelphia manager. / Quit comparing me to Ben Chapman.
Homer: Never saw the pork eat the beans before.
Homer Observational Deadpan/Understatement Patty · Homer: Justin Blobber over there doesn't remind you of anyone? / Women marry their fathers, Marge. So you just might be meeting your future 'ton-in-law.'
Homer · Lucas: Are you calling me not fat? / Maybe you just haven't found the right food, huh?
Homer: Oh, my God! Brain freeze! Oh, my God. Kick me in the head till I pass out. Harder! I'm still conscious!
Homer Physical/Slapstick Escalation Lucas: Twenty. Thanks, babe. Sorry you had to drop out of college to feed me full-time.
Lucas Dark/Subversive Escalation Bart · Bart: Better be a 64 gig. / It's full of lame apps: Bully Avoider, Nosebook, Insta-Grandma.
Milhouse: This was stolen from Milhouse! From my backpack. Where Puppy Goo-Goo sleeps.
Chief Wiggum: I never would've suspected the one criminal in town.
Snake: Careful. It's uncut syrup. They give it to horses before they race.
Snake Absurdist Character Comedy Kent Brockman: Albert Knickerbocker Aloysius Snake
Mayor Quimby: We had a law stating 'Three strikes and you're out.' But I thought it was 'You're out.' So I let people go. So now it's 'Four balls and you walk. Right to the electric chair.'
Bart: I was crushed when I lost my dad and all he did was move to the Holiday Inn. I can still see him smoking on the balcony. He looked like he missed something. Maybe me.
Bart Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Bart · Milhouse: I didn't say there'd be a sleepover. / Too bad, 'cause I'm wearing my pajamas under my clothes. And my swimsuit under those. One day it'll all pay off.
Homer: Oh, I can fake attentive. I've been watching a football game this whole discussion.
Homer Character Comedy Meta/Self-Referential Homer: She can smash a salad.
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist Homer: She might marry someone like me? You think that would be bad.
Homer Character Comedy Reaction Beat Homer: Marge, you are comparing me to the most infuriating thing in the newspaper!
Homer Escalation Character Comedy Homer: I'm sleeping on Flanders' couch tonight. Ours is crap.
Homer Character Comedy Misdirection Homer: Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God! / Hello? / Uh, hello. Lisa? I know your brother and... Oh! Stupid, stupid, stupid!
Homer Physical/Slapstick Cringe/Discomfort Homer · Barney · Moe: I got a date with my daughter! / Yeah, we all been there. / No need to act like you just invented air conditioning.
Homer · Moe: I got a date with my daughter! / Yeah, we all been there. No need to act like you just invented air conditioning.
Homer Moe Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Lou · Chief Wiggum · Snake · Chief Wiggum · Snake: The instructions are in Swedish, Chief. We got this from IKILLYA. / Yo, I totally speak Swedish. / Fluently? / Um, ja.
Lou · Wiggum: But Chief, we got guns; he's got a little wrench. / It's cold!
Snake · Chief Wiggum · Snake · Chief Wiggum: If I get caught, it's suicide by cop. / Oh, I don't like the sound of that. / It means I get you to shoot me, dude. / Yeah, still sounds like a lot of paperwork.
Marge: You look like an NBA coach.
Marge Visual Gag Character Comedy Marge: You look like an NBA coach.
Marge Observational Character Comedy Homer · Waiter · Homer · Waiter · Homer · Waiter: What is the normal amount of entrees per person? / Eh, one, sir. / I mean for adults. / One. / No, I mean for adult males. / Yes. I repeat, eh, one.
Homer: Can the red sauce be cow blood?
Homer Absurdist Character Comedy Homer: Homie, please, control your jealousy. This is your daughter.
Homer Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Marge: Remember that sewing machine you say I never use? Well, I sold it and bought this dress.
Marge Setup/Punchline Character Comedy Homer · Waiter: Thanks, Frenchy. / I'm not French, I'm just pissy.
Homer · Waiter: Thanks, Frenchy. / I'm not French, I'm just pissy.
Lucas: My new goal is to become whatever Adele is. Just call me Pound-Uca-Dollar.
Lucas Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Lucas: You know how to whistle? Like with your mouth?
Lucas Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Top Episodes — The Simpsons