Artie works hard to make sure all of Larry's ""friends"" attend a celebrity roast in his honor while Hank tries to learn how to handle hecklers so he can be the roastmaster.
WAR
42.1
Wins Above Replacement
“The Roast” ranks #48 of 90 The Larry Sanders Show episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 76.0 — Great. The episode packs 53 scored jokes at 2.1 per minute, averaging 6.9 on craft and 6.7 on impact, with Hank landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Artie: Get off the stage, ya fucking moron! I've taken shits more interesting than you are! You're nothin' but Larry Sanders' personal fuck-bitch!
Artie Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Larry: The key lime pie is delicious.
Artie: This is the worst fucking night of my life.
Larry: And that was chocolate cake.
Larry Artie Irony/Sarcasm Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Artie Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch Norm Crosby: He's on that new Hollywood agent diet. You can only eat while you're being eaten.
Artie: You'll either behave yourself, or I'm gonna snap your neck like a butter bean.
Artie Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 53 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Artie: I thought I smelled a publicity man on the premises.
Artie Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Artie: I remember the night they did Totie Fields. I think I heard every one-legged joke there ever was that night.
Artie Dark/Subversive Observational ★ Rewatch Hank: Oh, my God, girl, if you're going to a roast, I gotta take you shopping, teach you how to dress.
Hank: I believe technically it's called roast mastering
Hank Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Hank: Come on! That whole stand-up thing is a... it's just over. I mean, 'have you noticed this,' and 'have you noticed that?'
Hank Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Hank: Hillary Clinton may be Bill Clinton's first lady, but she is not his first lay.
Hank Setup/Punchline Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Hank: See? I notice stuff, too. I just don't write it down and go to some moth-eaten nightclub and repeat it.
Hank Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Artie: Get off the stage, ya fucking moron! I've taken shits more interesting than you are! You're nothin' but Larry Sanders' personal fuck-bitch!
Artie Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Artie Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch Dana: You mean after his other best friend, Jeffrey Dahmer?
Dana Dark/Subversive Setup/Punchline Dana: Jeffrey Dahmer is dead. He's unavailable. I know. That's the joke.
Norman: What are you, in P.R?
Bill Maher: I'm as free Saturday night as he is next month.
Phil: all you gotta do is come back with a dick-related insult. That's it.
Hank: what if the heckler's a woman?
Phil: Well, same thing. You talk about her dick. Makes 'em crazy.
Hank Phil Absurdist Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Phil: I don't come down to your job and knock the dick outta your mouth while you're trying to work.
Phil Setup/Punchline Callback Phil: you can blow me like everyone else on table. At your table.
Larry: Wait a minute. He told me he was going on vacation. Why do they have to lie that way?
Larry Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Stevie: Dennis Miller passed. He's very sick. He's in the hospital. Christ! It's like he wants to be caught.
Stevie Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Artie: Very simply, he's the guy we had to take to get Jerry fucking Seinfeld.
Artie Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Hank: Is mosquito right? Shouldn't it be hung like a bee?
Hank Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Carl Reiner: For 'the 2,000-year-old man.' We know that was my idea. Your idea was to tell Mel not to do it with a Jewish accent.
Hank: Get me a damp cloth and a cyanide tablet.
Hank Dark/Subversive Escalation ★ Rewatch Dana Carvey (as George Bush): Sorry I couldn't make it to your roast, Lar, but I'm bone-fishin' with Barb. Get it? Bone? Barb? Fishin'?
Dana Carvey: Tell Hank to shut the fuck up.
shave my head with a cheese grater... get a barium enema, and check Dom DeLuise's ball sack for lumps.
tell Hank that Ed said to shut the fuck up.
Dana Carvey: I just wanna say to Bruno Kirby, you owe me 250 bucks, you little prick. Where is he? Oh, there he is. OK.
Dana Carvey Cringe/Discomfort Meta/Self-Referential ★ Rewatch Carl Reiner: The great thing about Larry Sanders is that he never exploited the fact that he was a homosexual. He was gay, he was proud, but he didn't shove it down anybody's throat.
Most of it hit you when he tripped over the microphone cord.
Carl Reiner: oh, Christ, I'm not wastin' this on chicks!
He's doing his act. He's killing.
Larry Reaction Beat Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Carl Reiner: luckily, the camera loves me.
Artie: The bastard cancelled an hour ago.
Artie Reaction Beat Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Kip Addotta: Like today... we put salt on our asses... and we drove out to that petting zoo.
Larry: Well, then I owe Carrot Top a big apology for last year, don't I? Remember when I said he would suck a cock doing a sack race?
Larry Callback Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch and Tom Arnold's asshole was booked, so...
Carl Reiner: That's the kind of quick wit and jest that keeps you on Larry's couch.
Norm Crosby: you are absolutely adequate.
Norm Crosby: When I first met Larry Sanders, he was screwing my cousin. And I didn't even know that he knew Harvey.
Norm Crosby: When I first met Larry Sanders, he was screwing my cousin. And I didn't even know that he knew Harvey.
Norm Crosby: He's on that new Hollywood agent diet. You can only eat while you're being eaten.
Norm Crosby: You just... never seem to be able to get 'em at home.
President Clinton: I'd rather have Al Gore fuck me in the ass.
Bruno Kirby: What the fuck am I doing here? I'm an actor. We do 2 different things. Comedians jerk off. I work.
Bruno Kirby Cringe/Discomfort Meta/Self-Referential ★ Rewatch Bruno: And I don't owe you $250, pal. You owe me $250.
Larry: The key lime pie is delicious.
Artie: This is the worst fucking night of my life.
Larry: And that was chocolate cake.
Larry Artie Irony/Sarcasm Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Larry: This is the worst fucking night of my life. And that was chocolate cake.
Larry Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Jon Stewart: as opposed to Larry who's just old.
Jon Stewart: hey, why don't you speak up? Only the people at your table know you're an asshole.
Hank Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Hank: I don't come to your job and knock the dick out of your ass.
Hank Callback Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Callback Artie: You'll either behave yourself, or I'm gonna snap your neck like a butter bean.
Artie Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Carrot Top: It's a plate for bulimics. See, they can eat...
Larry: everyone I love is here tonight, and, um... what an honor.
Larry Awkward Silence Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch Top Episodes — The Larry Sanders Show
