Lisa competes at a spelling bee and earns the right to compete in the Spell-lympics, becoming the pride of the town. The host of the show George Plimpton, asks her to intentionally lose so that a more popular boy can win. Lisa refuses and continues to compete, but accidentally misspells a word and loses. Meanwhile, Homer tours with a group obsessed with eating Krusty Burger's latest sandwich.
WAR
60.7
Wins Above Replacement
“Im Spelling As Fast As I Can” ranks #252 of 552 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 79.0 — Elite. The episode packs 90 scored jokes at 4.7 per minute, averaging 6.8 on craft and 6.5 on impact, with Homer landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Homer: It's not just a sandwich. It's about brotherhood. It's about freedom. It's about three days since I've had one.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Homer: I have eaten the ribs of God.
Homer Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Spelling bee moderator: Alex, your word is 'rigged'... as in, 'This contest is rigged.'
News anchor: This has gotta be the slowest news day ever. Ah, that's better. Paris is no more.
Milhouse: Oh, I know this one. It's so easy. F-- Oh, man!
Milhouse Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 90 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Booberella: Frankenstein and the Harlem Globetrotters Meet the Mummy and the Washington Generals
Booberella: If you watch closely... you might recognize a young Ray Romano
Homer: Homer grunting and presumably adjusting himself after sitting down
Homer Physical/Slapstick Character Comedy Frankenstein: Don't blame Frankenstein. Me made from corpses of Denver Nuggets.
Booberella: Now for the first of our 82 commercial breaks. Then you can see more of my boobs.
Marge: It's nice to see a realistic single woman on TV.
Marge Irony/Sarcasm Observational ★ Rewatch Apu: Please don't beat me up any more.
Apu Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Commercial announcer: We start with authentic letter-graded meat... and process the hell out of it till it's good enough for Krusty.
Krusty: I don't mind the taste.
Krusty Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Homer: Wow, I can't wait to pack that into my colon.
Homer Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Bart: Dude, take it easy on the fatty foods. You're running out of leg veins to transplant into your heart.
Bart Dark/Subversive Observational Homer: I got arm veins, don't I?
Homer Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Groundskeeper Willie: This year, he gets it in the back.
Principal Skinner: At ease, Cadet Nelson. Good to be back on terra firma, eh?
Nelson: How about I launch my foot into your butt?
Nelson Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Principal Skinner: I held your hair when you barfed in the simulator.
Student: My dad says you were a busboy.
Student Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Principal Skinner: You mean your dad, the raging alcoholic?
Student: Come on, man. Everyone knows the first day of school is a total wank.
Student Observational Character Comedy Principal Skinner: Well, if by wank you mean educational fun... then stand back, it's wanking time.
Nelson: Bart said I am pee. He's made of pee.
Nelson Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Bart: Well, I got my laugh. I'm out of here.
Bart Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Nelson: I made Bart in my pants.
Nelson Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Milhouse: Oh, I know this one. It's so easy. F-- Oh, man!
Milhouse Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Principal Skinner: Stop laughing. It will scar him for life.
Principal Skinner: It is kind of infectious.
Nelson · Student: Hey, Lisa said she was-- Unh, shut up, Pee.
Lisa Character Comedy Observational Lisa: This is just a kickball with 'Mars' written on it.
Lisa Observational Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Principal Skinner: Behold, the Red Planet.
Homer: I see no evidence of water.
Homer Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Homer: Face it, they're doomed.
Homer Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Homer: But I've been fooled by so many people in costumes.
Homer Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Ribwich mascot: Try the sauce. I'm soaked in it.
Homer: I could lick you all day long. And yet my children think I'm a failure.
Homer Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Homer reading sign: Now without lettuce.
Homer: I have eaten the ribs of God.
Homer Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Spelling bee moderator: Nothing can ameliorate the ineptitude of Principal Skinner.
Principal Skinner: I wish he wouldn't use me in every example.
Lisa's cheering section: Diphthongs, cognates, Latin roots / Lisa clobbers all you fruits
Homer: Finally, a Simpson has a trophy without a bowling ball on it.
Homer Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Homer: That sounds like a magical family moment. I'm sorry I won't be there.
Homer Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Homer: Oh, sweetie. You're the most important thing to me in the world.
Homer Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Homer: Only very serious daddy business can tear me from your side.
Homer Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Homer: Three Ribwiches, please. And instead of a shake, I'd like a blended Ribwich.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Homer: Not again. First, you took away my Philly Fudge Steak... and then my Bacon Balls, then my Watcha-ma-chicken.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Homer · Ribheads: I could follow the Ribwich from town to town. That's what we do. We're Ribheads.
Ribhead: If you like the Ribwich, not very.
Ribhead Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement Groundskeeper Willie · Principal Skinner: Your effects have been moved to Willie's shack. Come along, lad. And lose your books. They won't help you where you're going.
News anchor: 3M and M&M have merged to form, get this, Ultradyne Systems
News anchor: 3M and M&M have merged... to form, get this, Ultradyne Systems.
News anchor: In a related story, the Spellympics is being sued by the Olympics... for use of the suffix 'lympics.'
News anchor: This has gotta be the slowest news day ever. Ah, that's better. Paris is no more.
Homer · Moe: Well, what about in the sentence 'Jim Nabors is way cool'? It's on my apron.
Homer Moe Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Cletus's family: Rubella, we got you a middle name.
Hillbilly · Lisa: Can you spell 'scabies'? / S-C-A-B-I-E-S. / Rubella, we got you a middle name
Cletus: Uh-uh. You forgot the lightning bolt.
Cletus Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Barney: That's what beer has done to me.
Barney Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Lisa: Perhaps one day, people who spell correctly... will replace athletes at the top of our national pantheon. Boo! Ha, ha, I was just K-I-D-D-I-N-G.
Lisa Character Comedy Meta/Self-Referential ★ Rewatch Moe: Hey, spell 'Little Miss She-Thinks-She's-So-Big.'
Moe Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort George Plimpton: I also played the evil dean in Boner Academy.
Audience member · George Plimpton: You monster. Why did you expel Boogerman? He replaced my tennis racket with a rubber phallus. Ha, ha, that was awesome.
Student · Plimpton: You monster. Why did you expel Boogerman? / He replaced my tennis racket with a rubber phallus
Alex · Lisa: Ha, ha, he's an acerose. Really? He possesses the properties of a pine needle?
Alex Lisa Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Alex: Look, I didn't bring a Game Boy. This is all I got.
Alex Character Comedy Observational Audience member: He's adorable. I'd sure like to tuck that in at night.
Homer: It's not just a sandwich. It's about brotherhood. It's about freedom. It's about three days since I've had one.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Homer: I'm getting the shakes and I'm getting the fries.
Homer Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Lisa: Then I'll be queen of the world! Of spelling.
George Plimpton: 'Look at me, I'm a drug addict. Ho, ho, ho.'
Lisa: Some of us still enjoy scripted comedy, sir.
Lisa Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Spelling official: Women in the audience toss their thick glasses at him
George Plimpton: And a hot plate. It's perfect for soup.
Seven Sisters colleges: Give in, Lisa. Get a free ride. And a hot plate.
Lisa · Marge: But you don't play the piano. I just gotta stay one lesson ahead of the kid.
Milhouse: I know this is a fantasy, but I'll take it. No! I'll never be this happy again!
Milhouse Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Ribheads: Hey, man, can you turn me on? Hey, don't borgnine my sandwich.
Ribheads Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Krusty Burger executive · Ribheads: The animal we made them from is now extinct. The pig? The cow? You're way off. Think smaller. Think more legs.
Homer: Welcome to the real world, hippies.
Homer Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Homer · Other person: Fighting over a stupid sandwich on my daughter's big day? Mister, I'll take that car.
Homer: I have the buyer's remorse.
Homer Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Spelling moderator: I don't know whether the weather will improve
Spelling bee moderator: Alex, your word is 'rigged'... as in, 'This contest is rigged.'
Spelling bee moderator: The little girl's intransigence cost her the college of her choice.
Spelling moderator: The little girl's intransigence cost her the college of her choice
Homer: Daddy made it for your dance recital, honey. Now super size it.
Homer Character Comedy Setup/Punchline ★ Rewatch George Plimpton · Lisa: You fool, it's E-N-C-E. Oh, my God, you're right. I spelled it wrong.
Homer: You're the number one speller in this car, or in that car... or in that car, or-- Don't look at that car.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Homer: Don't look at that car
Homer Callback Visual Gag Callback Principal Skinner: Before you, it was the woman who dated Charles Grodin.
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