Homer and Marge try to track down Grampa by following clues that lead to secrets from his past.
WAR
44.8
Wins Above Replacement
“Gone Abie Gone” ranks #401 of 552 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 75.4 — Great. The episode packs 61 scored jokes at 3.3 per minute, averaging 6.9 on craft and 6.6 on impact, with Homer landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Homer: That's one way to avoid drunk driving. Another way is don't drink. I'm not Superman.
Homer Escalation Character Comedy Grampa: He can handle 110 volt, but 220 would kill him.
Grampa Character Comedy Absurdist Homer: Well, thought bubble Marge said we should put it in a college fund for Lisa.
Homer Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer · Rita: What does that mean? I got super-addicted to heroin.
Marge: No gambling story has a happy ending except Seabiscuit. But you never hear about the ruined lives of the people who bet against him.
Marge Observational Misdirection ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 61 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Announcer: Couch gag parody of Wacky Races with car names like 'The Piggly Wiggums', 'The Greed Hornet', 'Hick Dastardly'
Bart · Homer: Beat ya! D'oh!
Homer: Pushy sign! Don't tell me what to try!
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist Homer: I don't recall that.
Homer Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Dr. Hibbert · Bernice: You got your brother following me? Chester needs a job. I paid him to build a shed! Where is my shed, Bernice?
Moe: Can I borrow ten bucks from the cash register? I've gotta get drunk before a party.
Moe Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Customer: A homeless man is giving himself a sink bath!
Homer Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Lawyer: Mr. Simpson, your injury was no accidénte, it was... negligénce.
Lawyer Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Lawyer: They have healed much too quickly. Sit still while I give your head the 'third degree.'
Lawyer Wordplay/Pun Dark/Subversive Lawyer: Yes, these are special acid markers.
Lawyer Dark/Subversive Escalation Krusty: It wasn't even my place! Man, I got a bad lawyer.
Krusty Irony/Sarcasm Setup/Punchline Homer: Well, thought bubble Marge said we should put it in a college fund for Lisa.
Homer Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer: That place is great! On their wall, they had a photo with an old couple walking on the beach with their pants rolled up.
Homer Observational Character Comedy Carl · Lenny: I saw a Sesame Street about it! Kermit was wearing his trench coat and everything. Wait, the frog in the trench coat is Kermit, too? All the frogs on that show are Kermit. Keeps all the other frog actors out of work.
Moe: A poker site is now safer than an American bank. Has our nation-- built on people suing because their onion rings were too hot-- come to this?
Moe Observational Irony/Sarcasm Callback Moe: Has our nation-- built on people suing because their onion rings were too hot-- come to this?
Moe Observational Irony/Sarcasm Barney: Hey, hey, hey, hey! Don't you badmouth this country. Compared to the rest of the Third World, we're doin' great!
Barney Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Homer: I've had it for a long time. I was just about to throw it out, and then this happened. Mwah!
Homer Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Homer: That's one way to avoid drunk driving. Another way is don't drink. I'm not Superman.
Homer Escalation Character Comedy Homer: Ha! Of course I do! Happy anni... birth... entine... Shark week?
Homer Character Comedy Escalation Homer: What the...?! Stupid calendar. First you put the Fourth of July on Sunday, and now this!
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist Homer: Then when he wants us to take him out to lunch, point to the leftovers, tell him we already did, but he forgot.
Homer Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Marge · Homer: Your father's not going to be around forever. Marge, you take that back! Fine, he'll be around forever. You take that back!
Homer · Nurse: Missing?! What kind of a prison are you people running here? If it's any consolation, we'll probably find him when the river thaws in the spring. A lot of bobbers then.
Homer: This room is like a museum of meaningless old crap. By which I mean every museum.
Homer Observational Escalation Homer: Flimsy lead, take me away!
Homer Character Comedy Meta/Self-Referential ★ Rewatch Homer: I'm only down $62. Not counting my tips to the waitresses.
Homer Escalation Character Comedy Homer · Flanders: Four queens! Yes! Yes...! Gambling, eh? Satan's most potent recruiting tool!
Homer · Flanders: Yeah! $50 up! Time to play with house money! Or time to walk away from the table. Shoo! How did he...?
Homer: Can't let Lisa lose her sense of wonder.
Homer Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Tough Guy · Homer: We don't like questions, man. Yeah, but I'm just trying to get information, like a nosy reporter or an undercover cop.
Spiro: When people ate steak, drank champagne, and the music... oh, the music! I hated the music!
Spiro Misdirection Character Comedy Boss · Marvin Hamlisch: Simpson! I pay you to clean tables, not to write songs. And you, Marvin Hamlisch, I pay you to write songs, not to clean tables! What can I say? I like to pitch in.
Homer: My dad was an aspiring songwriter like Charles Manson?
Homer Dark/Subversive Observational Spiro: Oh, that's right, 'cause it's a train wreck.
Spiro Observational Deadpan/Understatement Spiro · Homer: Tell him sorry from Spiro Papadapaconstanti-kasgianopolop odopotopolis. / Got it. Papadapaconstanti-kasgianopolop odopotopolis.
Spiro · Homer: Papadapaconstanti-kasgianopolop odopotopolis. Got it. Papadapaconstanti-kasgianopolop odopotopolis.
Lisa · Homer: There's exactly one Rita Lafleur living in Springfield! That's where we live!
Homer: Whoo-hoo! I get two Christmases!
Homer Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Jennifer Tilly: Time is money. Money is money. And money is college, which can lead to more money someday, but who knows anymore.
Homer · Marge: The man I looked up to my whole life. You never looked up to him.
Marge · Homer: You never looked up to him. / Well, it's a good thing I didn't because I'd be pretty devastated right now.
Rita: Beneath his mediocrity there was genius. Then a layer of anger. Then a beautiful soul. Then some more anger! A lot of layers.
Rita Escalation Character Comedy Rita: I love men on the rebound. They always think they've done something wrong and they usually come with furniture.
Rita Observational Character Comedy Homer: My Dad had furniture?! I don't know him at all!
Homer Character Comedy Escalation Grampa: He can handle 110 volt, but 220 would kill him.
Grampa Character Comedy Absurdist Grampa: This is why 'life' comes before 'love' in the dictionary.
Grampa Observational Wordplay/Pun Homer: Move over, Fonzie. I've got a new hero.
Homer · Rita: What does that mean? I got super-addicted to heroin.
Homer: It's like Kenny Rogers' most famous line: 'This is a bad piece of chicken.'
Homer Character Comedy Misdirection Marge: No gambling story has a happy ending except Seabiscuit. But you never hear about the ruined lives of the people who bet against him.
Marge Observational Misdirection ★ Rewatch Lisa: I was Ivy! Strong Ivy!
Lisa Character Comedy Escalation Callback Bart · Lisa: Because I actually like you and felt sorry for you. What?! You did? Forget I said anything!
Bart Lisa Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Bart · Lisa: Because I actually like you and felt sorry for you. / What?! You did? / Forget I said anything!
Store clerk: After people found out it's 98% squirrel sweat, they sorta stopped buying.
Homer: Man, you're making me hot for my Dad.
Homer Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Abe: Oh, I know him. He's a man who has no son!
Abe: I didn't wander off, ya big fat salami! I ran away!
Abe Character Comedy Escalation Homer: It's just that in today's multichannel environment, you have too many great choices. Look at Sunday night. There's, like, eight amazing shows. None of them on Fox.
Homer Meta/Self-Referential Observational ★ Rewatch Homer: That's how wolves die in the wild.
Homer Observational Deadpan/Understatement Top Episodes — The Simpsons