Liz and Jenna work on their dating game when they're beguiled by two very different MSNBC staffers: a brainy geek and a brawny hunk, but cerebral Liz finds it strange that she's more interested in the attractive one. Meanwhile, Kenneth and Jack switch roles.
Absurdist escalation carries 55 jokes at 2.55-per-minute velocity—Season 1's fastest clip.
Directed by Gail Mancuso · Written by John Riggi, Tina Fey, Matt Hubbard
WAR
68.5
Wins Above Replacement
“The Head And The Hair” ranks #58 of 138 30 Rock episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 86.0 — Elite. The episode packs 55 scored jokes at 2.5 per minute, averaging 7.4 on craft and 7.1 on impact, with Liz landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Tracy: I think my snake is sick, so I need you to go out to my car and rub his belly 'til he poops.
Tracy Absurdist Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Kenneth: Hey, Moonvest, I got an idea for a game show last night. Give me your fingernails!
Kenneth Escalation Absurdist ★ Rewatch Liz: Why do you have a picture of my great-aunt Dolly?
Liz Setup/Punchline Escalation ★ Rewatch Kenneth: From Walter Cronkite denouncing Vietnam to Oprah pulling that trash bag of fat out in a wagon.
Kenneth: Also I want five points on the back end, 20% gross on merchandizing, and a creator credit on this and any international editions. And a clock radio.
Kenneth Misdirection Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback All Jokes — 55 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Jenna: There are these two MSNBC guys we keep seeing around, and we don't know their names, so we call them the Head and the Hair.
Jenna Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Gray/The Head: That's a Japanese pie watch. It tells time with those little pie pieces. Each piece is six minutes. So right now, it's six times four.
Liz: 5:30. That can't be right. My watch has these little hands that go around and point at numbers.
Liz Deadpan/Understatement Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Unknown crew member: Hey, that's awesome, possum.
Tracy: A talk show without a host, just the voice of the dead lady from Desperate Housewives, or a reality show with a lot of super hot nannies who move into a house and help fat kids lose weight?
Tracy Absurdist Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Tracy: This television programming stuff is just one unpredictable ass ache, and I want you to get it out of here.
Tracy Character Comedy Observational Jack: I'm going to be your bottom, Kenneth. And I want you to ride me as hard as you can.
Jack Cringe/Discomfort Setup/Punchline ★ Rewatch Tracy: They had girls dancing in cages. And not the go-go cages, the little dog cages that you crate pit bulls in.
Tracy Escalation Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Frank · Toofer · Frank: That is awesome. - That is upsetting. - That is awesome.
Tracy: I left the party on a bacon run.
Tracy Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Tracy: January 17th. 2007? Yeah. Ah, dammit! I knew this was going to happen.
Tracy: My autobiography is due tomorrow.
Tracy Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Tracy: I think my snake is sick, so I need you to go out to my car and rub his belly 'til he poops.
Tracy Absurdist Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Liz: It's like having Confederate money. No one's going to take that.
Liz Observational Setup/Punchline Liz: My friend Jenna and I didn't know your name, so we've been calling you the Hair.
Liz Callback Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Callback Gray: How would you like it if I called you Glasses?
Gray Setup/Punchline Irony/Sarcasm Liz · Gray: I would be fine with that. Oh, good, because that's what I've been calling you.
Liz Gray Misdirection Escalation ★ Rewatch Tracy: She was just sitting there in her house coat, holding one of her boobs like this.
Tracy Cringe/Discomfort Observational Tracy: You knew when Sonny was coming over, 'cause she would take us to the store and buy two steaks and a bottle of Nair with cocoa butter.
Tracy Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Toofer · Tracy: According to Wikipedia, you were discovered after doing stand-up at the Apollo in 1984. I have no memory of that. Write it up.
Jack: Or get me a time machine so I can go back in time and smack your mom for smoking crack while she's pregnant.
Jack Escalation Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Jenna: Or maybe you really are the Hair and I'm the Head in our relationship.
Jenna Callback Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Jack: Liz and Jenna, nothing.
Jack Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Kenneth: That way, by the time Mr. Williams gets back from the liquor store, it's nice and tidy.
Kenneth Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Jack: Is this tube sock filled with bird seed?
Jack Absurdist Visual Gag ★ Rewatch Jack: Kenneth, this is not a job. This is an exercise in constant humiliation. You're fired.
Jack Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Liz: So... you guys been watching Heroes? I like the Japanese dude.
Liz Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Waiter: The hors d'oeuvres tonight are boxes of pure oxygen infused with a saffron and a white truffle oil.
Waiter Absurdist Setup/Punchline ★ Rewatch Liz: I just want to go home and watch that show about midgets and eat a block of cheddar cheese.
Liz Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Liz: And if you're trying to harvest my organs and sell them, I have an uncle who's a cop, so don't even try it.
Liz Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Gray: Hey, we all have uncles who are cops, so just take it down a notch.
Gray Deadpan/Understatement Misdirection ★ Rewatch Liz · Store clerk: See? It says right here: 'Legal tender for all debts public and private.' Does it say anything about $100 for a bottle of water?
Tracy: * Imagine Christmas wishes * Shooting out of your eyes * A candy cake * Full of snow dreams * A stocking full of smiles * It's a Jordan Christmas *
Tracy Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Liz: Although I ate way too much oxygen.
Liz Callback Absurdist ★ Rewatch Callback Gray · Liz · Gray · Liz · Gray · Liz: Call in sick to work and go see a movie. A movie? A movie. With you. With me. Now. Right now.
Jack: Lemon, you're looking a little under the weather. Maybe you should go home.
Jack Irony/Sarcasm Reaction Beat Kenneth: Because they make television. And more than jazz, or musical theater, or morbid obesity, television is the true American art form.
Kenneth Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Kenneth: From Walter Cronkite denouncing Vietnam to Oprah pulling that trash bag of fat out in a wagon.
Kenneth: From the glory and the pageantry of the Summer Olympics to the less fun Winter Olympics.
Kenneth Observational Deadpan/Understatement Kenneth: I want to see a show where women get their hair done, while listening to salsa music.
Kenneth Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Kenneth: It's called Gold Case. It's Deal or No Deal meets Millionaire.
Kenneth: Hey, Moonvest, I got an idea for a game show last night. Give me your fingernails!
Kenneth Escalation Absurdist ★ Rewatch Kenneth: As far as compensation goes, I would like to be officially the head of the pages, and I need a new clock radio.
Kenneth: Also I want five points on the back end, 20% gross on merchandizing, and a creator credit on this and any international editions. And a clock radio.
Kenneth Escalation Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Kenneth: Also I want five points on the back end, 20% gross on merchandizing, and a creator credit on this and any international editions. And a clock radio.
Kenneth Misdirection Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Tracy: Woke up in the camper at the auto show, and that's how 2006 ended.
Tracy Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Tracy: We do not want your book. Oops, my bad. That's on me. Shut it down.
Tracy Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Liz: I don't really hang out with superfluously handsome gentlemen in kick-ass elevator lofts.
Liz: I don't download music without paying for it. And I never wear flip-flops. Ever. It's gross.
Liz Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Liz: I do not sit on laps. Really? No, not a lap-sitter. Never have been.
Liz Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Liz: Why do you have a picture of my great-aunt Dolly?
Liz Setup/Punchline Escalation ★ Rewatch Gray · Liz: Franklin and Eleanor Roosevelt were fifth cousins. Okay, on the count of three, say what level of cousins we would have to be for this to be okay. One, two, three. Fifth. Unacceptable, no matter what.
Gray: You are a Hair, Liz Lemon. It's in our blood. Accept it. Embrace it.
Gray Callback Character Comedy Callback Host · Contestant: Congratulations. You struck gold on Gold Case. Oh, gold's real heavy, isn't it?
Jack: This is pathetic. A joke. This whole show is a joke.
Jack Meta/Self-Referential Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch 