As part of his community service, Tracy must coach a little league team. All goes well until Jack takes interest in the team and turmoil starts from there. Meanwhile, Liz is asked out on a date by Jamie, the new coffee boy, who thinks Liz is actually younger than she truly is.
Absurdist character comedy hits 83 with 3.11 jokes-per-minute sustained throughout.
Directed by Michael Engler · Written by John Riggi
WAR
66
Wins Above Replacement
“Cougars” ranks #93 of 138 30 Rock episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 83.1 — Elite. The episode packs 68 scored jokes at 3.1 per minute, averaging 7.1 on craft and 6.8 on impact, with Liz landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Liz: Give it up, Jenna. You're talking to an ultrasound.
Liz Setup/Punchline Visual Gag ★ Rewatch Kids: When I grow up, I'm going to do vending-machine maintenance. / I'm going to get shot by a cop and sue the city. / I'm going to be a talkative doorman with a drinking problem.
Kids Dark/Subversive Escalation ★ Rewatch Tracy: I wasn't. My motorcycle hit a police horse. This is community service.
Tracy Absurdist Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Frank: We're just two straight guys who want to enjoy each other's bodies.
Frank Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Kenneth: And they all seem to really hate my grandpa 'cause they keep yelling, 'Kill Whitey.' And I'm like, 'What do you think you are, alcohol?'
Kenneth Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 68 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Lutz: I am from Hamburg, ja!
Lutz Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Creed: Hey, Liz Lemon, I'm going to an animals-only strip club. Interested?
Creed Absurdist Setup/Punchline ★ Rewatch Liz · Creed: Does that mean the animals strip or the animals are the customers? / Animal customers? That's ridiculous.
Jack: Big night, Lemon? Let me guess. Meatball sub, extra bread, bottle of NyQuil, TiVo 'Top Chef,' a little Miss Bonnie Raitt, lights out.
Jack Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Jack · Liz: Then you won't mind when I tell you that Casey gets voted off tonight. / You monster! Why are you like this?
Jack: Dijonaise is a boy's name? Pardon me.
Jack Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Tracy: I wasn't. My motorcycle hit a police horse. This is community service.
Tracy Absurdist Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Tracy: These kids come from Knuckle Beach, the worst neighborhood in New York. They are poor as hell.
Tracy Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Jack: Everyone told us we were going to lose because our team was all white and the other team was completely... Uh... Anyway, we won
Jack Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Kids: When I grow up, I'm going to do vending-machine maintenance. / I'm going to get shot by a cop and sue the city. / I'm going to be a talkative doorman with a drinking problem.
Kids Dark/Subversive Escalation ★ Rewatch Tracy · Kids: 0-17. / Damn! We supposed to be at the game right now. / 0-18! / That one's on Coach Tracy.
Jack: That's right. You shoot for the stars.
Jack Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Kid: Someday I'll have an office like this. To clean.
Kid Misdirection Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Kid: Like R. Kelly and Michael Vick.
Kid Dark/Subversive Absurdist Jenna: Oh, my God. Who ordered the veal? Am I right, guys?
Jenna Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Jenna · Jamie: I like your blond streaks. It's very Simon Le Bon. / Who? / Oh, you're young.
Liz: Give it up, Jenna. You're talking to an ultrasound.
Liz Setup/Punchline Visual Gag ★ Rewatch Toofer · Frank: Hah, Frank's gay! / Maybe I am gay. For that little peach.
Tracy: There's a weird dude standing over there, and I don't want to get shot today.
Tracy Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Jack: That's why I sponsor a charity that gives away tuxedoes to homeless people. It was a beautiful ceremony. Mazel tov.
Jack Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Tracy: At our first practice, they asked me what the sun was.
Tracy Absurdist Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Frank: Did you just come from working out, or are you naturally veiny?
Frank Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Jamie: Just gellin' like Magellan.
Frank · Jamie: Jamie, how old do you think I am? / I don't know. 29? / Wow. You are good at guessing ages. I am exactly 29.
Frank: I bought you a sweater. It's slim-fitting. They call it a French cut. It wasn't on sale or anything.
Frank Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Toofer: You can't be gay for just one person unless you're a lady and you meet Ellen.
Toofer Setup/Punchline Observational ★ Rewatch Jenna: I had my 'no sex with Asians' rule. But then one day you walk into Sharper Image, and there's Quan.
Jenna Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Jenna: Cougars. Hot older ladies pouncing on their young prey.
Jenna Observational Visual Gag Jenna: The one with the 'Crisis in Africa' cover. God, it makes me so sad that more people don't know about cougars.
Jenna Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Jenna: You should get a Ring Pop to suck on.
Tracy: A world where orange soda is an acceptable substitute for breast milk!
Tracy Absurdist Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Jack: It's like this great country of ours. We can go into any nation, impose our values, and make things better. It's what Bush is doing all over the globe.
Jack Irony/Sarcasm Observational ★ Rewatch Tracy: Bush? Now, I don't want to go off on a rant here.
Tracy Meta/Self-Referential Reaction Beat Kenneth: Oh, sorry. This is my dream journal. They've all come true so far.
Kenneth Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Tracy: You can't wear blue in Knuckle Beach, which is hard because jeans go with everything.
Tracy Absurdist Observational ★ Rewatch Liz: Speaking of music I like, how about Gnarls Barkley, huh? That guy's great. Have you been to his official website?
Liz Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Liz · Jamie · Liz: I'm 37! / I'm 20. / This just went from a senior dating a freshman to Mary Kay Letourneau and Vili Fualaau.
Jamie · Liz: Are those friends of yours? / Oh, when will death come?
Jack: Where did you two meet? An Amber Alert?
Jack Setup/Punchline Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Liz: Boy, the art in here is hung really level.
Liz Reaction Beat Visual Gag ★ Rewatch Jack: You've got money, status, naturally thick hair, a decent set.
Jack Character Comedy Escalation Liz: I went up on my roof the other day.
Liz Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Kenneth: And they all seem to really hate my grandpa 'cause they keep yelling, 'Kill Whitey.' And I'm like, 'What do you think you are, alcohol?'
Kenneth Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Tracy: 'Betrayal'... colon... 'What Really Happened With My Baseball Team'... comma... 'Disaster at Knuckle Beach'... question mark.
Tracy Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Kenneth: And they won't listen, especially when I say, 'Don't hit me with my own shoes.'
Kenneth Character Comedy Physical/Slapstick Cerie · Aidan: Guess you're not the only cougar in town. Aidan's a freshman at NYU. / Sure. / Give me change for a soda? / You just had one. / Whatever. / Hey! What did I say about you wearing your Heelys inside?
Cerie: Is it like that time they found my grandpa at the bus station?
Cerie Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Cerie: Hey! What did I say about you wearing your Heelys inside?
Cerie Character Comedy Visual Gag ★ Rewatch Liz: His name is Jamie, and you know what? I don't spend a lot of time worrying about his feelings.
Liz Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Frank: That's great, Maude. How's Harold?
Frank Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Jamie: I made you a painting. It's called 'One-Armed Mermaid That's Part Unicorn With Bigfoot.'
Jamie Absurdist Visual Gag ★ Rewatch Jack · Tracy: One word. Surge. / That's two words!
Jack: Tracy, I'll pay somebody to read them for you.
Jack Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Frank: We're just two straight guys who want to enjoy each other's bodies.
Frank Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Jack: These Dominican birth certificates say otherwise.
Jack Dark/Subversive Visual Gag ★ Rewatch Jamie: Really? I've never been in a cab with less than seven people.
Jamie Observational Character Comedy Jamie · Liz · Jamie: All right, Mom. I'm taking off! / Mom? / Yeah, I'm 20. I can't afford this place.
Liz: Yep, that's what we look like. Shut it down.
Liz Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch Jack: Sexual incompatibility, social faux pas, meeting their parents.
Jack Observational Escalation Jack · Liz: A younger companion makes you feel more alive. Opens you up to new experiences, fresh points of view, stimulating conversation. / Stop repeating what I say.
Jack Liz Callback Meta/Self-Referential ★ Rewatch Callback Jack · Liz: What? No. I mean this company is my girlfriend. She gives me all the loving I'll ever want or need. / That's gross, Jack.
Jack Liz Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Jack · Liz: What? No. I mean this company is my girlfriend. She gives me all the loving I'll ever want or need. / That's gross, Jack.
Jack Liz Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Frank: I'm not gay-gay. I'm just gay for Jamie.
Frank Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Frank: I'm not gay-gay. I'm just gay for Jamie.
Frank Character Comedy Absurdist Callback Liz: My muffin top is all that? Whole grain, low fat? I know you want a piece of that? But I just want to dance?
Liz Character Comedy ★ Rewatch 