Pam is becoming more and more annoyed with Michael and his indecisiveness about ordering a desk chair. In Michael's defense, he's become distracted by his crush on the woman who is modeling the chair in the catalogue. He reminds Pam that since the infamous dinner party, he is now a single man.
WAR
80.6
Wins Above Replacement
“Chair Model” ranks #13 of 183 The Office episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 88.4 — Elite. The episode packs 71 scored jokes at 3.5 per minute, averaging 7.2 on craft and 7.1 on impact, with Michael landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
Get weekly comedy rankings
Join comedy fans getting new analyses, score drops, and the funniest moments each week. Free, no spam.
Top Jokes
Michael: (SINGING TO THE TUNE OF AMERICAN PIE) Bye, bye Miss chair model lady I dreamt that we were married and you treated me nice We had lots of kids Drinking whiskey and rye But why'd you have to go off and die? Why'd you have to go off and die?
Michael Character Comedy Escalation Absurdist ★ Rewatch Michael: Could we share a rowboat? Could a rowboat support her?
Michael Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Stanley: There's nobody I hate enough to write her name on this card.
Stanley Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Dwight: Deborah Shoshlefski, 142 South Windsor Lane. Dead, car accident. Case closed.
Dwight Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Michael: Would an average-sized rowboat support her without capsizing?
Michael Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 71 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Pam · Jim: Oh, today we saw a junkyard dog attacking the bones of a rotisserie chicken.
Pam Jim Observational Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Jim Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch Michael: I lost a penny out of my loafers, Oscar.
Michael: I will quit. As God is my witness, I will quit if this is not fixed.
Jim · Kevin: Some of us like the walk more than others. KEVIN: It hurts like hell.
Pam: But instead you found something to distract you from ever picking out a chair.
Pam Observational Character Comedy Jim: (IMITATING CHAIR MECHANISM) I really want it.
Jim Physical/Slapstick Character Comedy Michael: She dresses like a professional, and yet you know there is a side of her that could just curl up on a couch. Or in a great chair.
Michael Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Pam: I definitely remember your dinner party.
Pam Callback Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Callback Michael: I think what I meant was that I am completely swearing off one woman. Jan.
Michael Misdirection Character Comedy Pam: Actually, I put the catalogue in your hand, 'cause you have to pick out a new chair.
Pam Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Michael: And I'm optimistic, because every day I get a little more desperate, and desperate situations yield the quickest results.
Creed: When Pam gets Michael's old chair, I get Pam's old chair. Then I'll have two chairs. Only one to go.
Creed Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Toby: If I had somebody to set you up with, Michael, then I'd take her for myself.
Toby Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Michael: I thought you were engaged.
Michael Reaction Beat Character Comedy Michael: She's... You don't deserve her.
Michael Awkward Silence Character Comedy Michael: Hello, Oscar Mayer Weiner lover. I bet that you have a bunch of very liberal girl-type friends who trust you implicitly, because they know you'd never touch 'em because of your condition.
Michael Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Michael: F'eisty? So she's not jolly or sassy? Not like a jolly, sassy opera singer?
Michael Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Michael: Could we share a rowboat? Could a rowboat support her?
Michael Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Michael: Would an average-sized rowboat support her without capsizing?
Michael Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Michael: It bothers me that you're not answering the question.
Michael Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Phyllis: No, all right? No, she can't fit in a rowboat.
Phyllis Setup/Punchline Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Michael: Damn it! I knew it! I knew it, Phyllis!
Michael: Well, can, but won't. Should, maybe, but, shorn't.
Michael Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Michael: What part of 'shorn't' don't you understand, Kevin?
Michael Callback Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Stanley: There's nobody I hate enough to write her name on this card.
Stanley Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Phyllis: Well, I'm setting Michael up with my fat friend, anyway. He can just deal with it.
Phyllis Character Comedy Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Kevin Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Kevin: Hot and juicy redhead.
Kevin Setup/Punchline Misdirection ★ Rewatch Michael · Wendy's Employee: This isn't Wendy. I'm sorry. Could you put her on, please? Dude, this is a Wendy's restaurant.
Michael · Wendy's Employee: Could I just have a F'rosty and a baked potato, please? You have to come to the restaurant to order food. Well, I'll send somebody to pick it up, just have it ready. It's ready now. Well, put it aside.
Dwight: I will find her, and I will bring her to you. And as God is my witness, she shall bear your fruit.
Dwight Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Michael: F'irst, go to Wendy's, get my food, come back, and then go.
Michael Callback Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Dwight: Deborah Shoshlefski, 142 South Windsor Lane. Dead, car accident. Case closed.
Dwight Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Dwight: As dead as every dead animal who has ever died.
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Michael · Jim: Try not to be so hurtful, Jim. Jim, how dare you? Please, not at a time like this.
Michael Character Comedy Misdirection Michael: No question about it, I am ready to get hurt again.
Michael Character Comedy Observational Andy · Kevin: We need to assemble the F'ive F'amilies. No, not the F'ive F'amilies. We have to!
Andy: They call him 'Cool Guy' Paul.
Andy Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Andy Character Comedy Escalation Andy: Bill Cress is super old and really mean.
Andy Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Michael: Give her a 10 for her looks, and a three for her ability to describe herself.
Michael Character Comedy Observational Michael: Is who Michael what?
Michael Character Comedy Awkward Silence Margaret: You're asking me what I do with the checks that people write to me?
Michael: And you can't see her whole body, down here, she has a boob job.
Michael Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Michael: It was like talking to the sweet, old lady on the bus.
Michael Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Margaret: That's incredibly rude. Now you ruined it.
Andy: Andrew Bernard is the name of me, and this is my associate, Mr. Kevin Malone.
Andy Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Kevin: (STAMMERING) I have things.
Kevin Character Comedy Awkward Silence ★ Rewatch Business Owner: Could've done this over e-mail.
Andy: It's just nice to win one.
Andy Character Comedy Observational Michael: Margaret the landlady? Really, Pam? Is that what you think of me?
Michael Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Michael: I'm looking for a passionate affair, not companionship. I'm a man of intensity. Of cool, and youth, and passionately.
Pam: You just got yourself kicked out of your apartment.
Pam Setup/Punchline Character Comedy Pam: You're messy. You're a klutz, you spill everything. And you leave the volume on the TV way too loud.
Pam Character Comedy Escalation Pam: Maybe I'll just move in with my boyfriend, 'cause he's kind of a slob, too.
Pam Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Pam · Jim: I'm not gonna move in with anyone unless I'm engaged. Have I not proposed to you yet? I don't... No. Oh. Well, that's coming.
Pam Jim Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Jim: No, I'm not gonna do it right here. That would be rather lame.
Jim Character Comedy Meta/Self-Referential Jim: And when it happens, it's going to kick your ass, Beesly. So, stay sharp.
Jim Character Comedy Escalation Jim Escalation Character Comedy Jim: Got it a week after we started dating.
Jim Character Comedy Callback ★ Rewatch Jim: There was a woman in your life who affected you very deeply, and she left before you could say goodbye. I think you need to say goodbye.
Jim Character Comedy Absurdist Andy: I did this for the little guy. For Joe Six-Pack, the guy who wakes up every morning in his $400-a-month apartment, wonders how he's gonna pay his mortgage that month. Wonders how he's gonna fill his car up with oil. Wonders, 'How am I going to pay my kids' orphanage bills?'
Andy Character Comedy Escalation Absurdist ★ Rewatch Jim: I guess you could say she died of blunt-force trauma and blood loss. She got in a car accident and plowed into the side of an airplane hangar.
Jim Dark/Subversive Escalation Jim: She was stoned, apparently.
Jim Dark/Subversive Escalation Michael: You know, I used to think that I had this perfect person out there, waiting for me. But now I know that that's just silly. Because she's dead.
Michael Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Michael: You wait till next year's chair catalogue comes out, and you find someone who's still alive.
Michael Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Jim · Pam: My shoe is untied. What is your problem? Oh, my God! You thought I... No, no, no. How could I have thought that?
Jim Pam Misdirection Physical/Slapstick Callback Michael: (SINGING TO THE TUNE OF AMERICAN PIE) Bye, bye Miss chair model lady I dreamt that we were married and you treated me nice We had lots of kids Drinking whiskey and rye But why'd you have to go off and die? Why'd you have to go off and die?
Michael Character Comedy Escalation Absurdist ★ Rewatch Michael · Dwight: (BOTH SINGING) You believe in rock 'n' roll? Can music save your mortal soul?
⏩ The part you fast-forward
Our scorer flagged 11:30-14:30 as the stretch with the fewest or weakest comedic moments. Everything else lands harder.
Top Episodes — The Office
