Robert California brings his wife into the office for a job, and tells Andy behind her back not to give her one which turns disastrous. Meanwhile, Dwight opens a gym in the building and tries to get Darryl to join it.
WAR
97.7
Wins Above Replacement
“Mrs. California” ranks #99 of 183 The Office episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 87.6 — Elite. The episode packs 88 scored jokes at 4.1 per minute, averaging 7.2 on craft and 7.0 on impact, with Dwight landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Dwight: Dwight: 'Wow. I figured out your goal. I am gonna make you the buffest dude Val Kilmer has ever seen.'
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Callback Dwight: Dwight: 'Picture someone doing something heroic. Now, was he sitting or standing? Not counting FDR.'
Dwight Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Jim: Jim's talking head: 'I don't think we should be trying to make this place seem unpleasant. I think we should let this place just crush her spirit by itself — what it's doing to all of us.'
Jim Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Andy · Erin: Andy: 'Although, I was watching a movie and Meryl Streep had two secretaries.' Erin: 'I was watching a movie and a bunch of apes took over San Francisco. Just saying.'
Andy Erin Setup/Punchline Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Jim · Creed: Jim to Creed: 'Creed, I was never here, all right?' Creed: 'Okay. What about your friend?'
Jim Creed Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Standout Moments
Dwight: Dwight: 'Picture someone doing something heroic. Now, was he sitting or standing? Not counting FDR.'
Dwight Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Jim: Jim's talking head: 'I don't think we should be trying to make this place seem unpleasant. I think we should let this place just crush her spirit by itself — what it's doing to all of us.'
Jim Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Dwight: Dwight: 'Wow. I figured out your goal. I am gonna make you the buffest dude Val Kilmer has ever seen.'
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Callback All Jokes — 88 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Dwight: Dwight comments on someone's thinning hair while promoting his standing desk
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Dwight: Dwight: 'Every second you sit there is an hour off your life. Look at all of you. I feel like you're in a suicide cult.'
Dwight Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Kevin: Coworker responds to Dwight's standing desk pitch: 'I tried one of those, and I just couldn't find the sweet spot.'
Kevin Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Jim: Jim: 'Hey, guys, let's just all admit it, okay? Dwight's better than us.'
Jim Irony/Sarcasm Reaction Beat Dwight · Jim: Dwight: 'He had the guts to stop sitting, and he's never, ever gonna go back on it, right?' Jim: 'That's right, Jim.' — Dwight accidentally calls himself Jim.
Dwight Jim Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Dwight · Jim: Dwight sitting down. Coworker: 'Taking a load off, huh?' Dwight: 'No. Putting a load on, more like.'
Dwight Jim Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Callback Dwight · Jim: Jim: 'Good luck with that.' Dwight: 'Last thing I need is luck.'
Dwight Jim Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Callback Jim · Dwight: Jim drops something off Dwight's standing desk to force him to bend over and retrieve it. Dwight refuses because he's now sitting.
Jim Dwight Physical/Slapstick Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Jim · Dwight: 'Cause you could easily just bend over and pick that up right? / I could. I just don't feel like it, loser.
Jim · Dwight: Because you're sitting? / Standing. / Okay. Don't. / Because you're sitting? / Standing.
Andy: Andy fills out a form and writes 'Andrew Baines Bernard,' then says 'I love filling these out because it's like, oh, I'm taking a test but I know the answers.'
Andy Character Comedy Observational Robert California · Andy: Robert California storms in: 'In four seconds, my wife is going to be coming through that door. I told her she could work here. Under no circumstances can that be allowed to happen.'
Andy: Andy's talking head: 'I don't know. He wasn't talking to me. But if I were you, I wouldn't hire his wife.'
Andy Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Robert California: Robert: 'Something tells me it just might work out.' — said with absolute authority about a situation he privately wants to prevent.
Andy · Robert California: Andy: 'I would love to, but I have to be completely honest with you guys. We're 100% staffed up.' Robert: 'Andy, let's see if there's a good fit first then we'll talk.'
Andy · Dwight: Andy knocks on a door while saying 'Knock, knock, knock.' Dwight: 'You don't have to say it if you're doing it.'
Dwight: Dwight: 'Your path from obesity begins right here.' — advertising his gym to an employee who did not ask about obesity.
Dwight Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Kevin: Kevin's talking head: 'I used to say I wanted to live long enough to see a black president. I didn't realize how easy that would be. So now I want to live long enough to see a really, really gay president or a supermodel president. All the different kinds of presidents.'
Kevin Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Dwight: Dwight's talking head: 'Obese people in my office building are a drain on resources. Chairs wear out faster. It takes more freon to keep them cool. They flush the toilets more often. Plus, their massive BMs bust the rivets on my pipes.'
Dwight Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Dwight: Dwight: 'But a gym turns fat into cash.'
Dwight Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Callback Andy · Ryan: Andy: 'All right, well it was really nice to meet you, Brian.' Ryan: 'Ah, it's actually Ryan.' Andy: 'Oh, Ryan. Yeah.' Ryan (under his breath): 'Bitch.'
Andy Ryan Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Andy: 'We will start here at Erinville.' — Andy has named the reception area after Erin.
Andy Character Comedy Absurdist Andy · Erin: Andy: 'Although, I was watching a movie and Meryl Streep had two secretaries.' Erin: 'I was watching a movie and a bunch of apes took over San Francisco. Just saying.'
Andy Erin Setup/Punchline Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Robert California · Andy: Robert: 'Two secretaries could convey a sense of importance and success to our clients. Certainly worth exploring. Wouldn't you agree, Andy?' Andy: 'I'll explore exploring it.'
Robert California: Robert: 'Seems like you have this under control, so I'll just duck out and run the company for a while.'
Andy: Andy's tour: 'Next stop on the tour, sales. Here we go. Station stop Jim Halpert. Oh boy, our resident truth teller. All right, have at it, let her rip. What do you hate about this place?'
Andy Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Jim · Susan California · Dwight: Jim: 'Well, it's sales, so you have to be able to live in the world of rejection.' Susan: 'Maybe you do.' — and then Dwight immediately demonstrates his sales philosophy.
Dwight: Dwight: 'Sales is really not so hard, okay? It's paper. We have it, and they want it so bad they are willing to pay for it.'
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Jim: Jim: 'Well, it's not that easy. It's kind of sometimes difficult.' — immediately after Dwight's confident oversimplification.
Jim Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Susan California: Susan: 'It's the second-easiest job in the world. Being a mom. I love shopping. And sales is just the other side of that.'
Andy · Dwight: Andy: 'Dwight, why don't you tell Susan about some of your hobbies?' Dwight: 'Oh... Survival skills. Ranking of animals.' Andy: 'Maybe over a beer after she's closed her first sale.'
Dwight: Dwight: 'Well, make that a red wine and I'll tell you my animal rankings.'
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Callback Andy: Andy's talking head: 'How am I supposed to pull this off? The entire office is being nicer to her than they've ever been to me. What I wouldn't give for one of Phyllis' classic room-clearing farts right now.'
Andy Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Dwight · Darryl: Dwight shows his gym equipment: 'Gravel bucket squat yoke.' 'Dedicated phone book ripping station.' 'You ever cut tin before? Five yards in and your forearms will be on fire.'
Dwight: Dwight: 'Plus, I will buy the tin back from you that you cut for two cents a yard.'
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist Callback Dwight: Dwight's convoluted membership pricing: '$49 a month, but every third month is $59, but the fourth month is a discount month at $19.'
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist Darryl: Darryl: 'Obviously, you know how a gym works. So you know I'm not gonna pay money for this. You want people to come to your gym? Make a real gym.'
Darryl Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Andy · Oscar: Andy suggesting accounting as a fit for Mrs. California: 'I really clicked with Oscar, and I do have some experience with bookkeeping.' Accountants: 'We already have a surplus of accountants.'
Robert California: Robert: 'I am the CEO, and I am telling an employee of mine what to do.' — in response to Andy citing budget constraints.
Robert California: Robert: 'Let me beat around the bush for a second.' — while preparing to have a very indirect conversation.
Andy: Andy's talking head: 'It's not a bad thing to have the CEO owe you one.'
Andy Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Robert California · Andy: Robert calls his grandmother mid-conversation: 'Hello? Say hello, grandma.' Then coaches Andy: 'Hold one finger up to Susan. You'll just be a second.'
Robert California · Andy: Robert to Andy on the phone while grandma listens: 'You numbskull! You were given a very simple task.' Then: 'Now say, Are you taking your medicine?' Andy: 'Are you taking your med-meds?'
Robert California · Andy: Robert: 'You didn't say good-bye to your grandmother.' Andy: 'We promised we'd never say good-bye.'
Dwight: Dwight announces gym membership: 'First 20 members can take advantage of our pay-what-you-weigh promotion.'
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist Callback Oscar: All I need is another gym. As if I don't have enough drama. We have a gym at home. It's called the bedroom. Who's spotting who?
Oscar Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Kelly: Kelly: 'I have these sneakers which are basically just like a gym for your feet, so...'
Kelly Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Dwight: Dwight: 'You gotta get the black people to do it to get the white people to do it. Then you gotta get the black people to stop doing it. One step at a time.'
Dwight Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Darryl: Darryl: 'Did you bring your passport with you?' Mystery character: 'Who walks around with their passport?' Darryl: 'Well, I do. Always ready for adventure.' Character: 'Have you had any?' Darryl: 'No.'
Darryl Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Andy · Oscar: Andy's staff meeting: 'Robert doesn't want his wife working here. So now that she is, we have to drive her away.' Oscar: 'Andy, if he didn't want her working here, then why did you hire her?'
Andy Oscar Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Callback Andy: Andy: 'Oscar, it was a mistake. But one that can be fixed by all of us being mean to her.'
Andy Character Comedy Absurdist Toby · Stanley: Toby/Stanley: 'How can we do that? She's simply wonderful.' followed by 'This is all pathetic.'
Erin: Erin: 'I know exactly which stapler to give her.' — volunteering her form of sabotage.
Erin Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Oscar: Oscar to Mrs. California: 'Just sit here and be quiet. And if you have a question just raise your hand. But I'm gonna save you some time, sweetie, and give you the answer now: No.'
Oscar Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Susan California · Creed: Mrs. California delights over a tiny dog in a ladle: 'Oh, he's so tiny! Is he in a ladle?' 'Yeah, he's in a ladle.' 'That's adorable. How on earth did you get him in a ladle?' 'He did it himself.'
Susan California · Creed: Mrs. California: 'Is that ladle stainless?' Creed: 'Stainless. Williams-Sonoma.' 'Excuse me, waiter, there's a dog in my soup.' Creed: 'It's not that kind of ladle.'
Susan California: Mrs. California's talking head: 'Last time I had a job, I remember I hated the boss' wife. Of course, she was married to Robert.'
Robert California: Robert: 'I should step out, get to the ATM before that homeless man sets up camp for the night.'
Andy: Okey-dokey, artichokey.
Andy Character Comedy Awkward Silence Susan California · Andy: Susan: 'My husband can be a very difficult man to read, can't he?' Andy: 'Yes. The dude is an enigma.'
Dwight · Darryl: Dwight to Darryl at the gym: 'I was watching you. You want to know how long it really was? Eight minutes!'
Dwight · Darryl: Dwight: 'Is that the same philosophy you apply to buffalo wings?'
Dwight: Dwight: 'I want you to bring that same buffalo wing passion to this gym. I'm gonna make you look like Lebron James.'
Dwight Character Comedy Escalation Darryl · Dwight: Darryl: 'It's Lejon Brames.' Dwight: 'That's what I said.' Darryl: 'Yeah.' [knowing look at camera]
Jim · Andy: Jim is found by Robert and Susan. Jim: 'No, no. No, no, no. Don't. Damn it, Tuna.'
Jim Andy Character Comedy Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch Andy · Robert California: Andy confesses Robert's exact words: 'Robert storms in and he says, in four seconds my wife's gonna be in here, I told her she could work here, under no circumstances can that be allowed to happen.' Robert: 'You lying son of a bitch.'
Robert California: Tell my wife you're lying.
Robert California · Susan California: Robert: 'That's not true, is it?' Susan: 'No, it's not.' Robert: 'I tell the truth most of the time, and I was just telling the truth about your husband.'
Robert California · Andy: Robert: 'Where's Jim?' Andy: 'He just rolled out and crawled out.' Robert: 'Can you call security, tell them to keep an eye out for him?'
Robert California: Just real quick. Real quick, open... Okay. [Jim is discovered trying to hide]
Jim: Jim hiding, visually revealed in a cramped or odd space. 'That's weird.' — character reacts to discovering Jim's hiding spot.
Jim Visual Gag Physical/Slapstick ★ Rewatch Jim: Ow! Ow. Ow. [Jim crawling out of hiding, injuring himself]
Jim Physical/Slapstick Reaction Beat Callback Jim · Creed: Jim to Creed: 'Creed, I was never here, all right?' Creed: 'Okay. What about your friend?'
Jim Creed Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Dwight · Darryl: Dwight to Darryl in the gym: 'This is my gym, my rules. You do exactly as I say, no questions asked.' Darryl: 'Yeah, I'm gonna ask questions, and I might not do what you say.'
Dwight · Darryl: This is my gym, my rules. You do exactly as I say, no questions asked. / Yeah, I'm gonna ask questions and I might not do what you say.
Dwight · Darryl: Dwight: 'First thing, we're gonna stretch the pelvic bowl. Ready? Get down on the floor.' Darryl: 'Okay, I'm not doing that.'
Dwight: Dwight: 'Too embarrassing for you? You wish that every exercise was strutting around the gym like the Fonz? Well, how do you think the Fonz got so cool? He stretched his pelvic bowl.'
Dwight Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Dwight · Darryl: Darryl has actually done the pelvic bowl stretch. Dwight: 'Darryl joined.' Darryl: 'Looks that way.' Dwight: 'Nice pelvic bowl. Deep.'
Jim: Jim's non-answer to 'Did Robert tell you he didn't want me working here?': 'See, I didn't want to get in the middle of this. But here's something... I feel that maybe, if we take a step back, this is a simple case of anxiety to work with a spouse.'
Jim Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Jim: Susan: 'Jim. Answer the question please.' Jim delivers a heartfelt speech about how his wife on maternity leave makes him work harder and smarter. 'She literally makes me work harder. She makes me smarter. She makes me remember why I'm here.'
Jim Misdirection Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Andy · Susan California: Susan to Andy as she leaves: 'You know, honestly, we all wanted you to work there. Except for him.' Andy: 'Especially me.'
Dwight · Darryl: Off-screen voice screaming at Darryl during his workout: 'You're nothing! You're so weak! You call yourself a man? Huh?'
Darryl · Dwight: Darryl: 'This doesn't help me. I don't respond to that kind of strategy.' Dwight: 'Okay, fine. Finish your set on your own and never come back to my gym again!'
Dwight · Darryl: Dwight: 'Come back and spot me.' Darryl agrees. Dwight: 'But first, you gotta tell me what your goal is. What do you want?' Darryl: 'To push this bar up.' Dwight: 'No! Because if that was the case, the bar would be up by now.'
Darryl · Dwight: Darryl: 'To look good for Val.' Dwight: 'Val Kilmer? I don't buy it. That doesn't make any sense.'
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