Angela goes to Dwight for help when she learns that her husband is having an affair. Stanley and Phyllis take advantage of Jim when he needs a favor, and Pete distracts Pam as she begins painting her mural.
WAR
105.4
Wins Above Replacement
“The Target” ranks #40 of 183 The Office episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 91.1 — Elite. The episode packs 85 scored jokes at 4.0 per minute, averaging 7.2 on craft and 7.3 on impact, with Dwight landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Dwight · Oscar: What is it called when two men intertwine their penises like the snakes on the medic-alert bracelet? Uh... Is it called Red Vine-ing? We heard it was called Red Vine-ing. People Red-Vine?
Pam: And I just called to say your mama is so fat, when she wears red people yell 'Hey, Kool-Aid!' Yeah, your mom is fat! This is Pam Halpert!
Pam Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Angela · Dwight: I feel so stupid. I sit next to him every day. / You're not stupid. Jazz is stupid. / Jazz is stupid! I mean, just play the right notes!
Angela: Okay. But it's cruel, because a woman with damaged knees can't scrub worth a damn.
Angela Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Pete · Pam: Our crowning complaint card comes to us thanks to Pamela Halpert. For insulting a client's recently deceased mother. A woman who struggled with obesity all her life. I am so sorry. Yeah, that is terrible.
Pete Pam Dark/Subversive Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Standout Moments
Pam: And I just called to say your mama is so fat, when she wears red people yell 'Hey, Kool-Aid!' Yeah, your mom is fat! This is Pam Halpert!
Pam Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Angela · Dwight: I feel so stupid. I sit next to him every day. / You're not stupid. Jazz is stupid. / Jazz is stupid! I mean, just play the right notes!
Dwight · Oscar: What is it called when two men intertwine their penises like the snakes on the medic-alert bracelet? Uh... Is it called Red Vine-ing? We heard it was called Red Vine-ing. People Red-Vine?
All Jokes — 85 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Oscar: Yesterday, Angela may or may not have figured out that I am having an affair with her husband. So I just have to wait and see when she comes in, if she's cold and awkward and cruel to me, then great, it's business as usual.
Oscar Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Angela · Oscar: Angela enters and says 'Good morning' warmly — a long pause before Oscar's relieved reaction beat
Angela · Oscar: Angela asks Oscar if it's cool in the office, and Oscar — terrified she's being metaphorical about their situation — over-confirms and immediately pivots to blaming the thermostat.
Oscar: This is a woman who married a man who is obviously a homosexual. Basically she has her head in the sand. In a way I feel sorry for her. I guess the universe rewards true love.
Oscar Irony/Sarcasm Dark/Subversive Jim: Well, it's finally happened. Pam has ceased caring.
Jim Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Jim: Last week, Jim wasn't there and they named the company Athlead. I could have prevented that.
Jim Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Jim · Pam: Hey, David? How'd you like a guy who's not here as much, gets paid the same amount of salary and has bigger fish to fry in Philadelphia?
Jim Pam Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Jim: I think it's good. He likes fishing.
Jim Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Callback Pete: But the information's already on the computer. So, why am I filling out the card? I asked Andy and he told me to chillax. And then went away on a big, long boat ride. So here we are.
Pete Observational Deadpan/Understatement Pete: Don't give me a pointless office chore, because I will build a little paper house. Fight the power.
Pete Absurdist Character Comedy Angela · Dwight: Meet me in the old place. Five minutes. I need you! [via text message from Angela]
Meredith · Dwight: Come on in, the water's fine. Dwight, it's not that kind of meeting. Put your clothes back on!
Dwight: I know. That's not why I'm naked. I always work out without my clothes.
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Meredith: I'm sorry, your vigilante privileges ended when you broke up with me.
Meredith Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Meredith: If I'm not in your panties, I don't go vigilantes.
Meredith Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Dwight · Angela: All right, what are we talking, surveillance, wire-tapping? / Something like that. / Yeah. The less I know the better.
Dwight: The text went through. Okay. All we can do is sit and wait. Okay. Oh! Look at that. Yeah, he's free any time. Not a problem.
Dwight Deadpan/Understatement Escalation Jim · Phyllis · Stanley: Why should we help you? Because we are friends. When is my birthday? Unfair. When's my birthday? I don't know, because we're not friends.
Darryl · Pete: Make it go taller. That's the idea. No, not taller this way, taller this way.
Kevin: He's a sweet kid, Darryl, but not the sharpest guy in the drawer.
Kevin Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Darryl · Kevin: Kevin, I can hear you. Uh-huh.
Dwight: Well, this documentary crew has been following our every move for the past nine years, but I don't see them, so I think we're good.
Dwight Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Trevor: I started following people around to get exercise. Turns out I'm damn good at it.
Trevor Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Angela · Dwight · Trevor: Do you have a gun? Does he own a gun? Show her. You tell me. What is this? That's the receipt for my gun. You don't carry it with you? Read the receipt. That's a $300 gun. Someone could steal it.
Dwight · Trevor · Angela: You have any idea how many guns Trevor has had stolen from him? Now I keep it in a safe. A good safe? You tell me. [Dwight opens an impressive safe; Angela reacts]
Pam: I guess if I make a mistake, I can just paint over it with a shrub or something. It's just I think less of paintings with a lot of shrubs, so I'm going to limit myself to one shrub.
Pam Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Hide · Pam: You paint wall now? Yeah! Painting now. [pause] You paint now? I mean, it's probably going to be a few minutes... I wait. Sweet! Yay!
Hide Pam Character Comedy Awkward Silence Pete: This next card comes to us thanks to Meredith Palmer, who called Eastern Pennsylvania Seminary a, quote, 'sausage factory.'
Pete Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Creed: Up next, we got a whole lot of Creed. Let's find out what I did.
Creed Character Comedy Meta/Self-Referential ★ Rewatch Dwight · Trevor: You get half now and you get half upon completion of said job. And it's all off the books? Obviously. Nice. No taxes.
Dwight · Trevor: You get half now and you get half upon completion of said job. And it's all off the books? Obviously. Nice. No taxes.
Dwight · Trevor · Angela: So, what's the job? Murder. Okay. That's the big one. That's the big—
Dwight · Angela: What if they deserved it? / There are a lot of different ways to get revenge. I've had great success by defecating in a paper bag, putting it on the porch. That's very effective. I've been on the receiving end of that quite a few times. It's devastating.
Dwight · Angela · Trevor: What about a knee-capping? No! You're not helping, Trevor. Yes! A knee-capping could work.
Angela: Okay. But it's cruel, because a woman with damaged knees can't scrub worth a damn.
Angela Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Trevor: Now, the hit goes down at 4:00. Keep in mind, once I leave, there's no turning back.
Trevor Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Jim: You know, truth be told, I think all you'll really be doing is accepting calls from my clients while I'm gone.
Jim Irony/Sarcasm Misdirection Stanley: I'll have the surf and turf, with a side order of lobster. Actually the surf and turf does come with lobster. Not enough lobster. Side order. How much wine do you have?
Stanley Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Oscar · Angela: I brought you a cookie. Thanks, Oscar, you're such an angel.
Oscar: I just gave her a cookie, and she called me an angel, so, yeah, we're good. Yeah, we dodged a bullet.
Oscar Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Pete · Darryl: This next one goes to Darryl for pocket-dialing a customer while having sex.
Darryl: Actually that was the sound of me eating spaghetti, but I'm going to let them think the other thing.
Darryl Deadpan/Understatement Misdirection ★ Rewatch Callback Kevin · Jim · Pete: Kevin knocks over the card tower. Panic. Jim says 'It's just a mistake. That's what this tower is all about. Mistakes... If you're afraid of screwing up, this tower's not for you.'
Phyllis · Stanley: You know what? I don't know where the years went. Because sometimes when I look at my hands, I don't even recognize them. Tell me about it. Whose hands are these? They're not my hands.
Pete · Kevin · Darryl: All right! Check it out. Yes! Like a phoenix from the ashes! Nice. Pretty soon, we're going to be at the ceiling.
Pete · Pam · Kevin: It's empty. What? What? Come on, we could use a blank card. No! No! That's cheating! I could get us a complaint. You? Little Miss Priss? You wouldn't fart on a butterfly.
Pam: No, I wouldn't. I can't even relate to that impulse.
Pam Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Callback Kevin · Pete · Darryl: Pam! Pam! Pam! Pam! Pam! Pam! Go, Pam! Pam! Pam! Pam! [Kevin chanting, others joining]
Dwight: The target. It's Oscar, isn't it? He and the Senator are gaying each other.
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist Dwight: Your nostrils tell a different story. They flare like that every time you're engaging in deception. Hello again, naughty nostrils.
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Angela · Dwight: ...and all the while running behind your back, and defiling your marriage, and seducing your husband! / But the first ones to break your marriage vows were you and me!
Dwight · Oscar: Oscar! Oscar, good! Listen! Hey, come with me! What? Come with me! What are you doing? There are a bunch of construction workers in the warehouse without their trousers... I'm working. ...drinking diet sodas. You have got to see this. They're extraordinary. Yahtzee!
Trevor · Oscar · Dwight: Sandwich delivery for Mr. Oscar Martinez. / I am Oscar Martinez. / No, not him, outside! Outside!
Dwight: You know there's donuts in the break room? Nice!
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Jim · Stanley: Listen, I was really wondering if maybe we could lock this down before lunch is over. Don't be pushy, Jim. It's tacky.
Jim: Don't poke people with knives! Phyllis!
Jim Physical/Slapstick Character Comedy Jim · Phyllis: Phyllis! Phyllis! That's decorative. No, there's wine in here. It's still decorative. Is it white wine? Nope.
Dwight · Oscar: There's no time to explain! Dwight... Okay, actually there is time to explain. When Angela found out that you seduced her husband, we hired a guy to break your kneecaps.
Dwight Oscar Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Dwight · Oscar: My God! What is wrong with you? What is wrong with you? There are a million gorgeous guys in the Scranton/Wilkes-Barre area, and you choose the man who is the father of her child?
Trevor: Actually, he's right in front of us! Let's get it on. I'm going to do this. I might... I might puke, but I'm going to do this.
Trevor Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Dwight: He's a Dunder Mifflin man. He's my tribe.
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Trevor: Sorry, Dwight, but for once in my stupid, stupid life, I'm going to follow through on something. All right? I have masculinity issues, I have...
Trevor Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Dwight: He's a Dunder Mifflin man. He's my tribe.
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Pete: Come on, Pam, I know you can fail. I see failure in you. Remember, you're a scum bag, so you think scummy thoughts, like this.
Pete Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Pam: And I just called to say your mama is so fat, when she wears red people yell 'Hey, Kool-Aid!' Yeah, your mom is fat! This is Pam Halpert!
Pam Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Pam · Pete: Did they say anything? What did they say? I couldn't tell. I don't... Were they angry? I felt like they were confused at least.
Pam Pete Character Comedy Reaction Beat Pam · Kevin · Pete: Did they say anything? / What did they say? / I couldn't tell. I don't... Were they angry? / I felt like they were confused at least.
Pete · Kevin · Pam: Ladies and gentlemen, we just lost a client! Yes! All right! Come on! You did good. You did good. See you later, Heymont!
Dwight: If you chase me, I will run so fast. If you catch me, I will bite so hard. Got it? Goodbye, my friend.
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Angela · Oscar: You made my husband gay! / What I did was wrong, and I have to live with that every day. But your husband is gay and he was gay when you married him.
Dwight: Angela, it's a lead fricking pipe! God!
Dwight Character Comedy Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch Oscar: Angela, it's a lead fricking pipe! God!
Oscar Character Comedy Escalation Pete · Pam: Our crowning complaint card comes to us thanks to Pamela Halpert. For insulting a client's recently deceased mother. A woman who struggled with obesity all her life. I am so sorry. Yeah, that is terrible.
Pete Pam Dark/Subversive Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Angela · Dwight: I don't like your friend Trevor. / I don't like him either. [beat] And yet, I really like him.
Phyllis · Jim: We're going to cover for you, you know? / Phyllis, what was that? Phyllis, are you dreaming, or... / I did enjoy grinding your beans, son.
Stanley · Phyllis · Jim: Yeah, we really did peel your grapes. / Shucking your peas! / Shucking my peas. / All right, just go back to the first part. You are going to cover for me?
Stanley · Jim · Phyllis: Yeah, we really did peel your grapes. / This is hilarious. But we're going to stop with all the... / Shucking your peas! / Shucking my peas.
Hide · Pam: You paint very bad, bad! / Shut up, Hide!
Hide Pam Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Callback Pam: I mean, do you think Kevin cares what people think about him? Or Creed? Or Meredith? Oh, my gosh, these are my role models now. You know what? I'm okay with that.
Pam Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Dwight · Oscar: Where does gayness come from and how is it transmitted? My pastor said it can come from breast feeding. He said that? Well, he didn't fight me hard on it.
Dwight · Oscar: Where are gay men's vaginae? / They don't have vaginae. / What? / No. They're just regular men.
Dwight: When two gay men have sex, how do they know whose penis will open up to accept the other person's penis?
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Callback Top Episodes — The Office
