Michael practices for the birth of Jan's baby by having Dwight go over possible birthing scenarios. Meanwhile, Michael tells Holly that he will pretend to dislike her for Jan's benefit.
WAR
79.4
Wins Above Replacement
“Baby Shower” ranks #126 of 183 The Office episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 86.0 — Elite. The episode packs 70 scored jokes at 3.5 per minute, averaging 7.2 on craft and 7.1 on impact, with Michael landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Creed: Creed: 'Must be like the tide at Omaha Beach.' (about the afterbirth floating in the tub birth)
Creed Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Narrator · Michael: Talking head: 'Now this baby will be related to Michael through... Delusion.'
Dwight: Dwight: '$1,200 is what I spent on my whole bomb shelter.'
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Dwight: Dwight talking head: 'I do not like pregnant women in my workspace. They're always complaining. I have varicose veins, too. I have swollen ankles. I'm constantly hungry. Do you think my nipples don't get sore, too?'
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dwight: Dwight's confessional: 'Babies are one of my many areas of expertise. Growing up, I performed my own circumcision.'
Dwight Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Standout Moments
Narrator · Michael: Talking head: 'Now this baby will be related to Michael through... Delusion.'
Dwight: Dwight: '$1,200 is what I spent on my whole bomb shelter.'
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Creed: Creed: 'Must be like the tide at Omaha Beach.' (about the afterbirth floating in the tub birth)
Creed Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 70 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Michael · Jan · Dwight: Jan simulating labor contractions while Michael coaches her like a birth partner, but they are practicing with a watermelon
Michael · Jan: Jan tells Michael her cervix is ripening; Michael says 'Okay, good' as if receiving a routine status update
Michael · Dwight: Michael drills Dwight on the birth route — 'Highways or surface roads?' — while Dwight insists he checked and there are no potholes on Gibson
Michael · Andy: Michael asks Andy, 'Would you like to have my baby?' and Andy immediately says 'Yes!' before Michael shuts it down
Dwight: Dwight's confessional: 'Babies are one of my many areas of expertise. Growing up, I performed my own circumcision.'
Dwight Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Michael · Dwight: Michael screams 'Cradle my head!' while Dwight coaches him through the watermelon birth simulation
Dwight · Michael: Dwight instructs Michael to secretly mark the baby with a Sharpie so 'no baby snatcher could ever copy' the mark — then butters the watermelon before it shoots out
Michael: Michael talking head: 'This is going to be the happiest day of my life.'
Michael Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Michael · Phyllis: Michael asks Phyllis if she got the live storks for the baby shower
Michael · Phyllis: The M&M bowl is labeled 'Astird' because Michael misspelled 'Astrid' when writing the name down
Unknown: Talking head reaction to 'Astird' — someone looks pained at the camera
Michael · Phyllis: Michael tells Phyllis 'we all came into this room and gave you a golden shower' — referring to her wedding shower — without realizing what 'golden shower' means
Michael: Michael talking head: 'It does not matter to me at all whether this baby is biologically mine. I'm going to love it. It's like when the dog nurses the tiger cub. Have you seen that video? It is so bizarre and unnatural, but it happens.'
Michael Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Kevin · Phyllis: Kevin asks why they have to pay money for 'his ex-girlfriend's unborn sperm-bank baby'
Phyllis: Phyllis: 'Look at it as if you're paying for the cake, not the baby. Sheet cake.'
Phyllis Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Phyllis: Phyllis talking head: 'I'm no longer under Angela's heel, and her little grape head is under mine.'
Phyllis Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Angela · Phyllis: Angela appears and tells Phyllis not to talk to the camera crew, ordering her to 'Make the party' — implying she's lurking and monitoring Phyllis
Jim · Pam: Jim on the phone with Pam while she tells an extremely convoluted art school story — Jim can barely follow the names and keeps getting corrected
Jim Pam Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Jim · Pam: Pam: 'No, Stacy is a boy.' Jim: 'This is so frustrating. Why can't you just be in art class with me?'
Jim Pam Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Jim: After hanging up, Jim says to no one: 'That was a good story.' Then: 'Who's Sarikaya Komzin?'
Jim Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Callback Andy: Andy shows off the baby photo guessing game — 'Who would have thought that this little baby would be marrying that little baby?'
Andy Character Comedy Absurdist Andy · Phyllis: Baby photo game: Andy identifies a baby photo as two babies who would grow up to marry each other, then discovers one is Phyllis
Andy · Phyllis: The baby photo turns out to be Phyllis. Andy: 'I hope you two are very happy together. Pervert.'
Michael · Holly: Michael approaches Holly with 'Ahoy, matey!'
Michael · Holly: Michael tells Holly that Jan is 'incredibly fat and enormous right now, extremely unattractive' — then adds that he's treating Ryan the same way
Dwight: Dwight talking head: 'I do not like pregnant women in my workspace. They're always complaining. I have varicose veins, too. I have swollen ankles. I'm constantly hungry. Do you think my nipples don't get sore, too?'
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Jan · Jim · Michael: Jan arrives at the office — she has already had the baby, and Michael had no idea
Narrator: Talking head: 'Jan had the baby, and Michael wasn't there to mark it. So the baby could be anybody's, except Michael's.'
Narrator Callback Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Callback Michael · Jan: Michael calls the baby 'Astird'; Jan corrects him: 'Astrid.' Michael: 'Oh!'
Michael: Michael: 'The birth instructor had no sense of humor, and I proved him wrong in so many ways.'
Michael Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Michael: Michael talking head: 'I try to pick up and hold a baby every day, if possible, because it nourishes me. It feeds my soul. Babies are drawn to me, and I think it's because they see me as one of them. But cooler, and with my life put together a little bit.'
Michael Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Michael: Michael talking head: 'If a baby were president, there would be no taxes. There would be no war. There would be no government, and things could get terrible... It would be a better screenplay idea than a serious suggestion.'
Michael: Michael announces the baby as 'As... Trid. Trid Levinson.' — mispronouncing/splitting the name
Michael Running Gag Character Comedy Callback Michael · Office Staff: Michael attempts a Lion King-style presentation of baby Astrid, lifting her up — the office shouts 'Michael!' and he's stopped before he goes too high
Michael · Holly: Holly tries to check in on Michael emotionally and he snaps: 'I'm fine, weirdo. Such an HR weirdo. Try not to suck all the air out of there when you walk in.'
Kevin · Michael: Kevin: 'So we had games planned, but the baby ruins all of them.' Michael: 'The baby doesn't ruin anything, Kevin, okay? The baby multiplies the fun.'
Kevin · Office Staff · Michael: The office hosts the baby shower guessing game 'when will the baby be born?' — the baby has already been born and is in the room
Jan: Jan dismisses the gift stroller: 'She already has a stroller. And this is way worse than the stroller she came with. She's got an Orbit. That's a $1,200 stroller.'
Jan Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Dwight: Dwight: 'For that kind of money, this stroller should be indestructible.'
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Callback Jan: Jan sings 'Son of a Preacher Man' at the baby shower — she has been singing for 20 minutes
Jan Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Jan · Office Staff: Jan singing 'Son of a Preacher Man' at the baby shower, alone, for 20+ minutes while the office stares
Pam: Pam, on the phone from a laundromat, discovers she washed her lipstick: 'Great, I washed my lipstick.'
Pam Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Jan: Jan's baby is let outside and nearly goes near a fence/barbed wire; Jan shouts 'Don't hit the fence!' and 'Don't get stuck on the barbed wire!' and 'Playtime is over!'
Jan Absurdist Character Comedy Creed · Jan: Jan: 'No, it's actually really hygienic, Creed. After the birth, you get out—' Creed: 'I'm done.'
Creed Jan Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch Callback Michael: Michael says he should have been there to witness the birth: 'I could have helped.'
Michael Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Jan: Jan asks Michael to remind her to talk to him about Astrid's 529, then: 'Wake me in 20.'
Jan Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Michael: Michael talking head: 'I usually love babies, but when I held Astrid I just felt... Shortchanged.'
Michael Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Michael · Darryl: Michael approaches Darryl calling himself a 'baby-daddy' and asking for advice 'from one baby-daddy to another'
Darryl · Michael: Darryl: 'Hell, yeah. You know why? 'Cause that was my baby.' / Michael: 'You should stop calling yourself baby-daddy.' / Darryl: 'Because you're not a daddy, and it's not your baby.'
Michael: Michael: 'Why, Darryl? Because I'm quote white unquote, unquote?'
Michael Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Michael · Darryl: Michael points to the watermelon: 'You feel connected to this?' Darryl: 'That's not a baby.' Michael: 'You want to hold me, see how you feel?' Darryl: 'Could I? No.'
Michael · Darryl: Michael points to the watermelon on Darryl's desk: 'You feel connected to this?' Darryl: 'That's not a baby.' Michael: 'You want to hold me, see how you feel?' Darryl: 'Could I?' Michael: 'No.'
Michael · Office Staff: Michael asks where Astrid is; someone says she's 'on a sales call.' Michael: 'On a what?' Response: 'Wah, more paper. Wah.'
Michael: Michael: 'No, she's just on her coffee break. That's funny.' Then: 'She's with Angela.'
Michael Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Michael · Angela: Michael tries to get baby Astrid to look at his finger for a photo — Angela gets involved — Michael: 'You don't flash around a newborn baby. Don't you know that?'
Michael: Michael's internal debate about telling Holly about her hygiene — 'She smells like old tomatoes and dirt.'
Dwight: Dwight performs the 'bumper test' on the gift stroller — a prolonged sequence of slamming it into things to test its durability
Dwight Physical/Slapstick Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Jan · Dwight: Jan asks where the stroller she came in with is — Dwight immediately says he put it in her trunk. The gift stroller he just destroyed is gone.
Jan · Michael: Jan asks Michael not to date Holly — Michael: 'That's... I hate her.' — then immediately starts defending Holly before walking back 'not that it matters, 'cause I don't'
Jan Michael Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Callback Michael: Michael: 'Not that it matters, 'cause I don't, but...' — trailing off while clearly meaning the opposite
Michael Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Callback Holly · Michael: Michael, after Jan and baby leave, silently approaches Holly — long pause — then: 'You still going to be mean to me?'
Holly Michael Character Comedy Awkward Silence ★ Rewatch Callback Michael · Holly: Michael asks Holly out with a simple 'Want to go out?' Holly says 'Yes.' — then Michael's talking head: 'I didn't feel much when I held Astrid, but I got a good feeling from Holly.'
Michael Holly Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Callback Michael · Holly: Holly says 'Yes' to going out with Michael — Michael's talking head: 'I didn't feel much when I held Astrid, but I got a good feeling from Holly.'
Jim · Pam: Jim and Pam's dueling voicemails — each calls the other, gets voicemail, leaves a message. Jim talks to Pam's outgoing message; Pam talks to Jim's.
Jim Pam Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Callback Jim: Jim's voicemail to Pam: 'I figured I'd catch you walking to your car, but guess you must be out or something. I'll leave a message.' — immediately after getting voicemail
Jim Observational Character Comedy Jim: Jim's voicemail message to Pam references 'that crazy guy who pushed you' at the laundromat — then remembers they went shopping the next day to buy a washer-dryer — 'And yet, here you are, back in a Laundromat.'
Jim Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Jim: Jim's voicemail: 'I'm headed home.' Then catches himself: 'I'm headed to my dorm. Not home.'
Jim Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Top Episodes — The Office
