Dwight installs a Doomsday device that will fire all of the employees and effectively close down the branch if they make too many mistakes. Meanwhile, Gabe attempts to court the new warehouse worker, Val.
WAR
66.4
Wins Above Replacement
“Doomsday” ranks #124 of 183 The Office episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 86.1 — Elite. The episode packs 58 scored jokes at 2.8 per minute, averaging 7.3 on craft and 7.0 on impact, with Dwight landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Oscar: Oscar's email: 'He eats his yogurt like he is punishing it for disappointing him.'
Oscar Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Dwight: Dwight digging: 'If you hit another horse, you've dug too far.'
Dwight Deadpan/Understatement Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Gabe · Toby: Gabe: 'Do you know her last name yet?' / 'Toby, I'm gonna tell you her last name tomorrow because she's gonna be screaming it tonight.' / Toby: 'She's gonna be screaming her own last name?'
Gabe Toby Setup/Punchline Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Dwight: Dwight's kicker: 'As with all my dreams, I'm guessing it was about my fear of immigrants.'
Dwight Character Comedy Misdirection ★ Rewatch Callback Dwight: Dwight's talking head: 'They're making me out to be a Bond villain. I like to think of myself as a brilliant scientist who will stop at nothing to remake the world. Like — not Doctor Moreau — someone good. Doctor Frankenstein. Doctor Jekyll, not them. Doctor—'
Dwight Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Standout Moments
Gabe · Toby: Gabe: 'Do you know her last name yet?' / 'Toby, I'm gonna tell you her last name tomorrow because she's gonna be screaming it tonight.' / Toby: 'She's gonna be screaming her own last name?'
Gabe Toby Setup/Punchline Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Oscar: Oscar's email: 'He eats his yogurt like he is punishing it for disappointing him.'
Oscar Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Dwight: Dwight digging: 'If you hit another horse, you've dug too far.'
Dwight Deadpan/Understatement Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 58 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Andy: Andy sings 'Closing Time' as an end-of-day office tradition, belting it out while employees look on with varying degrees of tolerance
Andy Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Jim: Jim's talking head: 'Andy has been manager for 105 days, which means I've heard Closing Time 105 times. Still don't know the words.'
Jim Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Callback Andy: Andy storms off: 'You know what? Fine! I try to start fun traditions for you guys but if you don't want to sing, no traditions.' Then immediately turns back and sings the outro.
Andy Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Pam: Pam's talking head: 'I never heard that song before and once I heard it I did not care for it. But that song means it's time to go home. Now it's my favourite song.'
Pam Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Callback Dwight: Dwight's talking head dream: 'Last night I dreamed that the number two was the most valued number in the world. The Vice President had all the power, athletes fought for silver medals, women were considered the best gender. And stadiums of fans shouted, "We're number two!"'
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dwight: Dwight's kicker: 'As with all my dreams, I'm guessing it was about my fear of immigrants.'
Dwight Character Comedy Misdirection ★ Rewatch Callback Robert California · Andy: Robert calls Kevin and Oscar 'Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum' then clarifies: 'Who are they? They're both Kevin.'
Robert California: Robert describes Oscar as 'the Sex and the City gang' and struggles to describe Angela: 'Angela, if you can...'
Angela · Andy: Angela's flat response to Robert: 'Andy, sometimes I feel like you don't know me at all.' Followed by Andy: 'I would agree with that.'
Robert California: Robert: 'Our favourite names, silly made-up names, normal names said in a silly voice. Wouldn't that be nice?'
Robert California: Robert's exit line: 'And you can't have a favourite Iron Chef. It depends entirely on the secret ingredient. Sometimes I feel you don't know food at all.'
Gabe: Gabe awkwardly appears at the warehouse safety meeting and says 'Corporate. Continue.' trying to assert dominance; no one is impressed.
Gabe Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Andy · Dwight: Andy: 'Have I not been a reliable number two?' / Dwight: 'Do not go there.' / Andy: 'You're the deuce I never want to drop.'
Andy · Dwight: Dwight: 'I will do my voodoo.' / Andy: 'Go do the voodoo that you do so we—' / Dwight: 'I will do my voodoo.'
Gabe · Toby: Gabe to Toby: 'Whom I am seeing is Val, from down in the warehouse. I'm not technically seeing her but I've seen her with the eyes. And there was attraction in at least one direction, so...'
Gabe Toby Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Gabe: Gabe: 'I don't want a bunch of bureaucratic red tape wrapped around my jock, you know?'
Gabe Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Dwight: Dwight explains five mistakes = 'a home run' and 'one home run and you're out' — inverting baseball scoring as a negative outcome
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist Dwight · Jim · Oscar · Kelly: The office learns the failsafe will also forward every negative email they've ever sent Robert about him. Reading of the emails: 'Creep by TLC, Creep by Radiohead.' / 'There's no way he hasn't strangled at least one stripper.' (Jim) / 'He eats his yogurt like he is punishing it for disappointing him.' (Oscar)
Jim: Jim's email about Robert: 'There's no way he hasn't strangled at least one stripper.'
Jim Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Andy · Kelly: Kelly's email PS: 'We should kill him.' / Robert's reaction-beat read as Andy delivers it flatly: 'That's not that bad, actually.'
Andy Kelly Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Callback Jim · Dwight: Jim: 'Wait. So you installed a doomsday device?' / Dwight: 'No, it's an Accountability Booster.' / Jim: 'Which, when it goes off, it destroys everything.' / Dwight: 'Very similar to a doomsday device.'
Oscar: Oscar: 'No, we're not. And you are a psycho who is ruining our lives.'
Oscar Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Dwight: Dwight's talking head: 'They're making me out to be a Bond villain. I like to think of myself as a brilliant scientist who will stop at nothing to remake the world. Like — not Doctor Moreau — someone good. Doctor Frankenstein. Doctor Jekyll, not them. Doctor—'
Dwight Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Ryan: Ryan's talking head: 'This doomsday device sounds like a scare tactic to me. There's an easy way to tell if this device is a sham — we just make a mistake.'
Ryan Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Darryl · Val: Warehouse safety meeting: 'Third—' / 'Who knows what the belt is for?' / 'It's for protecting my ass when you suckers lift more than you can handle.'
Darryl Val Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Gabe: Gabe's talking head: 'I get the sense that Val enjoys a good put-down. Considering that's the only thing I know about her, I will be milking that hard.'
Gabe Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Gabe: Gabe at warehouse meeting: 'The Michelin Man called, he wants his cummerbund back.' [said to Darryl about the support belt]
Gabe Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Oscar: Oscar's talking head: 'When the stakes are this high, there's only one computer that I trust. And it's powered by Thai food and Spanish reds.'
Oscar Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Jim · Dwight: Jim: 'If this doomsday device goes off—' / Dwight: 'Accountability Booster.' / Jim: 'If this bad idea goes off...'
Jim · Pam: Jim and Pam trying to guess Dwight's password. Jim: 'Try Mose-1-2-3-4.' / Pam: 'Dwight would never be that obvious. Try something like Z-6-4-$-8.' / Jim: 'Not that exactly, something like that.' / Pam: 'How about Scranton-Strangler-6-6-6?'
Jim Pam Character Comedy Absurdist Jim · Pam: Jim: 'What's Dwight's mother's name?' / Pam: 'Hedda.' [long pause, they stare at each other]
Jim Pam Reaction Beat Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Gabe · Val: Gabe bribes Val with $100 to get coffee and contrives to go with her, then contradicts himself: 'Don't bring me any of that caramel soy latte crap, okay? I want a decaf frappuccino.' / Val: 'Caramel soy latte.' / Gabe: 'No, a decaf frap.'
Gabe Val Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Andy: Andy's reaction to learning five strikes have been reached: 'I was saving this for my retirement, which I guess is today.' [pulls out bottle]
Andy Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Kevin · Andy: Kevin: 'Can you tell me now where paper comes from?' / Kevin: 'The man tree puts its penis...' / Andy: 'Okay. All right.'
Kevin Andy Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Dwight: Dwight's final word to the office as he leaves: 'Good luck finding a new job, idiots. I'll make sure to write you a glowing reference.' / Beat. / 'Glowingly negative.'
Dwight Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Andy · Pam · Kevin: Andy's plan: 'Pam, you should come with me. Dwight really likes you, and your breasts are enormous, that could help us.' / Kevin's assignment: 'Kevin has that lovability.'
Andy · Jim: Jim about Robert's location: 'He's at some club where you either eat squash or play squash.' / Jim: 'I'll try both.'
Andy Jim Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Pam · Dwight: Pam arrives at Dwight's farm with a gift, tries to reason with him. Dwight: 'Get lost.' / Pam: 'Well, now hold on.' / Dwight: 'What does it look like I'm doing?' / Pam: 'Digging a grave for a horse.'
Pam Dwight Deadpan/Understatement Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dwight: Dwight shows Pam and Kevin around the farmhouse: 'This is the newest addition, built by Erasmus Schrute in 1808. It doubled as a tuberculosis recovery room until 2009.'
Dwight Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Pam · Kevin: Pam and Kevin discuss Labradoodles: 'That's too much doodle and not enough lab.' / 'Yeah, when are they gonna do a Labradoodle that's just lab? That's what I'm saying.'
Gabe: Gabe asks Val to the cemetery for wine: 'Tonight I was thinking I'm gonna go to the cemetery. I'm gonna drink a little wine and I thought maybe you'd like to come with me.'
Gabe Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Gabe · Val: Val immediately shuts down Gabe: 'Are you asking me on a date?' / Gabe: 'Yes, I am.' / Val: 'Because I don't date coworkers, it's not personal. It's a matter of policy.' / Gabe: 'I could quit.' / Val: 'Don't quit.' / Gabe: 'Good policy. It's sensible. Smart.'
Gabe Val Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Robert California · Jim: Jim tries to delay Robert at squash: Robert serves and Jim awkwardly plays. 'All right. Serving. Serving, serving, serving. In the box. In the box.'
Kevin: Kevin's plan to save the company: 'I know how to save the company, everyone. Just write a petition, get everyone's signatures including our clients, march down to Florida and shove it up your butt.'
Kevin Character Comedy Absurdist Meredith: Meredith's flat response to Kevin's plan: 'It's not that funny.'
Meredith Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Pam: Pam distracts Dwight: 'Pam, you got something on your shirt. Oh!' then says 'Pobody's nerfect, right?' — a transposition of 'nobody's perfect'
Pam Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Dwight · Kevin · Pam: Dwight: 'Did you just have a stroke, Pam? It's nobody's perfect.' / Kevin: 'Nice stroke, Pam.' / Pam: 'No, it's a jokey saying — Pobody's nerfect. Like, I can't even say those words right.'
Dwight · Pam · Kevin: Dwight: 'You know what would go so great with this cabbage pie? Milk.' / Pam: 'Any specific animal?' / Dwight: 'I'm thinking cow.' / Kevin: 'Don't say cow.'
Pam · Dwight: Pam's stalling goodbye: 'Thanks for everything. Sive drafely.' / Dwight: 'Wasn't it supposed to be drive safely?'
Jim · Robert California: Jim's phone battle with Robert at squash: Jim tries to check Robert's phone, they tussle over it, Jim drops it, Robert: 'What the *?' / Jim: 'Oh man, I'm sorry!' / Robert: 'Jesus! Did it break?' / Jim: 'No it's good, thanks.'
Robert California · Jim: Robert and Jim examine each other's phones after the melee: 'What kind of iPhone is that?' / 'It's the standard one, the one everyone has.' / 'Yeah, I have the one that nobody has.'
Robert California · Jim: Robert reads Jim's email notifications: 'Is there anything interesting? It depends, Jim. Do you find one-day-only JetBlue sales to Buffalo interesting?'
Jim: Jim's talking head after squash: 'Well, I am sore and obviously horrible at this.'
Jim Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Dwight: Dwight's talking head after canceling the device — discussing the office: 'They're not my favorite people in the world. I wouldn't even call them friends. They come over here, eat my pie, dig the crappiest horse grave you've ever seen.' / Beat. / 'God, I'm gonna have to work with them forever, aren't I?'
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Callback Jim · Robert California: Jim and Robert California play squash; Jim falls and skins his knee. They both agree it hurts and carry on.
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