Sweet Sixteen

Oh, Ann, you beautiful, rule-breaking moth.

Boss, I need your Herbie Hancock on this. Outside.

But it's great exercise... But it's a pain in the ass.

Parks is inside. Campaign is outside. Parks is inside. Campaign's outside.

Ooh, you know what would make it more fun? - What? - Oh, my God, this.

Well, I have time to spare. I'm also volunteering at 'Wheels For Meals On Wheels.' We repair vans for 'Meals On Wheels.'

Or I own four identical versions of the same sweater. No, you don't, there's an old lollipop that's been stuck to the back since Tuesday.

That's the style now, Ron. It's called 'lollipopping.' All the kids are doing it.

I accept your apology, I will not take a sabbatical, as we agreed, and we will never discuss this again.

Hold up, hold up, hold up. Hold up, hold up, wait. That's you.

So I'm 'Tommy's girl,' and you're just 'Tom'? Why not 'Ann's man'? Nobody owns me, cupcake, not even you.

We put the hats on-- Don't say it. We take everything else off.

These Kangol hats are exactly like the one Samuel L. Jackson wore to the Latin Grammys. How could she not like them?

I really don't care what happens to them... Or anyone.

As the Germans would say, 'er ist ein wunder hund.' He is a wonder dog.

The dog training course I took was conducted entirely in German, and so now I'm fluent in German... Words relating to dogs.

He's a mutt. Half amazing, half terrific.

Ich bin ein three-legged dog.

Who wouldn't? That sounds like an amazing day, right?

My birthday is February 29th, so I only get one real birthday, you know, once every four years.

We go, we split a huge piece of cotton candy cheesecake from Cakey J's Cheesecake Facility.

And then, well, we hold hands for a while. We listen to some Anita Baker. She meets up with some friends, and I turn in early.

64 divided by 4 is-- 16. 64. So we're gonna throw him a Sweet 16 surprise party.

Let's start a pool. Who wants retired? Who wants dead? Dead. No. I got one dead. No.

We're not big on hospitality. The Meagles are a cold people.

And if you listen closely, that is the bubbling of the hot tub. You do not have access to it.

Ginuwine's my cousin. Ginuwine? The Ginuwine is your cousin?

Ginuwine is Ginuwine. He's Ginuwine.

Not loving '90s R&B music is number three on the 'oh-no-nos' list.

Toxic. Merkel. - Merkel. - What is 'Merkel'? She's the Chancellor of Germany.

Crow for dinner tonight, Mr. Swanson?

Guys, someone was supposed to invite Jerry. It's his surp-- Crap, it was me. I forgot to invite Jerry.

By the end of the night, you are going to take a bite of Jerry's cake, which incidentally, we need to pick up on the way home, and you are gonna say, 'sabbatical, schmabbatical. Leslie can do it all. She's the best, and I'm stupid.'

Ann, I'm at 600. Are you really not stopping me? I have those cotton t-shirt sheets. Huh?

She's never seen a single Paul Walker movie? That's a huge 'oh-no-no.' She also 'doesn't care' about Blu-ray? She's a monster.

I own more pairs of Uggs than she does.

I was getting kind of sick of listening to Tom and Ann talk about their relationship, but then I remembered that alcohol existed. Thank you, alcohol.

Well, because I thought you were Gayle. What are you doing in my bathroom?

Oh, did we lose more seniors in the woods? No, it's a sinkhole, right?

Sometimes you just have to let a dog be a dog. He'll be all right. Champion! He'll come back.

You don't need to read the whole thing. 9u/09230023-- 099twposter-- it does say that. .jpeg. Jpeg. Yes, Walter, it does say that.

You put 20" rims on your Volkswagen Golf, and you insist on being introduced as 'the brown Gosling.'

Everything you just said makes me like me more.

We didn't get to the drug store for my liver medication. Well, you should've thought about that before we dragged you out of the bath, Jerry.

Oh, what the [Bleep]? Surprise. Where the hell is everybody?

Champion, you're lost and soon you'll be found / I rescued you from the pound, something something oh man on the ground / get on out of here

Dog whistle.

It's also about Ann and I getting back together and being the hottest couple in Pawnee. I'd also like to announce our official relationship mash-up name. It's 'Tan.' To Tan.

I would like to announce that the name Tan is officially over. To the end of Tan.

I would like to address the fact that rule number seven says, 'no pets,' and yet there is a three-legged animal in my living room.

Jerry's work is often adequate.

I have a stepbrother who lives in London and 2.8% body fat.

You probably should just sit there and not move. She's really tired. Just a few hours. Few hours?

I used to work in a sheet metal factory, but then a job came along at the tannery. The hours were better, and I would get paid. Also I'd have the chance to work with leather both before and after it was on the cow, which had always been a dream of mine.

How old were you? 11.

Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing.

Yes, but I hate them. I know you do, sweetheart.

Amazingly, yes. Muncie, Indiana.