After reading an article about China growing as a global power, Michael decides China must be stopped before they take over the US. Everyone in the office complains about Dwight's building standards and Pam threatens to move Dunder Mifflin to a new building.
WAR
38.3
Wins Above Replacement
“China” ranks #83 of 183 The Office episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 79.1 — Elite. The episode packs 44 scored jokes at 1.9 per minute, averaging 7.0 on craft and 6.7 on impact, with Michael landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Creed: What if we all get together and help each other and hire a new guy and then we all kill him but first we take out, like, a $100,000 life insurance policy?
Creed Dark/Subversive Escalation ★ Rewatch Dwight: Don't get me started on how coddled the modern anus is.
Dwight Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Jim: And my daughter, Cece, dances on your grave fully clothed.
Jim Escalation Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Dwight: they say the best vampires don't bleed their victims dry, but give them the strength so that they can bounce back only to be fed on again.
Dwight Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Jim: Well, 'a' for effort, right?
Jim Wordplay/Pun Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 44 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Dwight: 20 minutes a day, all feet, no hands and I'll have the pededexterity of a chimp and you'll be sitting there like an idiot.
Dwight Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Dwight: Allow me to write you an apology letter. D-e-a... oops, space, 'a. Dear...'
Dwight Physical/Slapstick Cringe/Discomfort Dwight: thank you, hands. Nothing else in the universe can do what you do.
Dwight Reaction Beat Absurdist ★ Rewatch Jim: Well, 'a' for effort, right?
Jim Wordplay/Pun Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch Andy: Du blueberry, por favor.
Andy Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Andy: $8? (reaction to muffin price)
Andy Reaction Beat Observational Dwight: Owning a building is a war between the landlord and the tenant. Not a literal war, unfortunately.
Dwight: And by green, I mean money.
Dwight Irony/Sarcasm Wordplay/Pun Michael: China. China. (Michael's repetitive fixation)
Pam: Yeah, that's where they make stuff.
Pam Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Michael: China is a sleeping dragon that is just beginning to stir.
Michael: China should be like eight.
Darryl · Andy: You gotta stop texting me so much. But I wanted you to know that Michael and I are wearing the same tie today. It's insane.
Darryl: B.T.B. Bring that Booty.
Dwight: Oh, I'm sorry. Is that not good enough for your anus?
Dwight Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Dwight: Don't get me started on how coddled the modern anus is.
Dwight Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Dwight: 'Which is you' is not a sentence.
Nate: Hey, Pam, Dwight's being questioned by the police in connection with a string of dognappings...
Michael: So much for keeping our secrets up high.
Michael Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Michael: Where forks are irrelevant.
Stanley: You never told us to close them.
Stanley Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Kevin: An antacid that you only take once a week.
Kevin Absurdist Character Comedy Creed: It's too big a pill to swallow.
Creed Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Creed: What if we all get together and help each other and hire a new guy and then we all kill him but first we take out, like, a $100,000 life insurance policy?
Creed Dark/Subversive Escalation ★ Rewatch Angela: I will not work in a roach billboard.
Angela Visual Gag Character Comedy Ryan: Oh, my God, I've been playing zombie soccer for two hours?
Ryan Character Comedy Absurdist Creed: Is the nail place Koreans or whites? Koreans. Good. And the dry cleaners? White? Good.
Creed Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Michael: He really does fit that old stereotype of the smug gay Mexican.
Darryl · Andy: You're one bad text away from gettin' blocked. Yes, but one good text away from a high five.
Kevin · Pam: I wish for a million wishes. Yeah, no, I'm not a genie. Then see you later, building.
Kevin Pam Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Dwight: And 25 years from now, Cece will become world famous for stripping.
Dwight Dark/Subversive Escalation Jim: And my daughter, Cece, dances on your grave fully clothed.
Jim Escalation Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Jim · Michael: What do you know about boobs? Michael, I have to tell you something. It's from rocky ii.
Michael · Realtor: I'm Pam. Oh. No, you're not. I'm sorry, we have a colleague with the same name. You're not a liar too, are you?
Michael: I can't wait to do to Pam what I just did to Pam.
Pam · Jim: I lied about some aspects of the building. It's still on a bike path, though, right? There's no building. It doesn't exist.
Pam Jim Escalation Cringe/Discomfort Michael · Oscar: I wasn't here. What? I wasn't here. It's a pretty common saying.
Michael: That as long as people like you and me don't stop talking... Nobody can stop the U.S.A.
Michael: if you dig long enough and hard enough in a conversation, you get to a friend.
Dwight: they say the best vampires don't bleed their victims dry, but give them the strength so that they can bounce back only to be fed on again.
Dwight Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Dwight: I was not motivated by compassion. I have no compassion. Make sure you got that. Not motivated by compassion.
Darryl: Come to parking lot. Crazy pigeon action.
Darryl Character Comedy Callback Callback Andy · Darryl: That's a text. Yeah, right? That's a new standard.
⏩ The part you fast-forward
Our scorer flagged 18:00-19:00 as the stretch with the fewest or weakest comedic moments. Everything else lands harder.
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