Michael suspects Donna is cheating on him and puts P.I. Dwight Schrute on the case. Meanwhile, Andy is frustrated when no one takes his customer's complaint seriously.
WAR
53.8
Wins Above Replacement
“The Chump” ranks #108 of 183 The Office episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 76.8 — Great. The episode packs 69 scored jokes at 2.8 per minute, averaging 6.9 on craft and 6.7 on impact, with Michael landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Michael: If I had a gun with two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden, and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice.
Michael Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Dwight: You line them all up, you take one bullet, shoot them all through the throat at the same time. Watch this. Phyllis, you're Hitler.
Dwight Physical/Slapstick Absurdist ★ Rewatch Michael: I am so into the institution of marriage. Two good people finding each other, getting all committed to each other.
Michael Irony/Sarcasm Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Michael: All the time I was thinking, 'I'm sleeping with your wife.' And you know who does that? James freakin' Bond.
Michael Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Michael: But as a fan, it just helps me enjoy the game better if I know the coach loves his wife.
Michael Cringe/Discomfort Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 69 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Michael: The first time I threw mine away, I thought it was an ant trap. But I figured I'd rather live with ants than with his creepy little disk.
Michael Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Michael: The second time... I thought it was one of those, you know, the things you turn over, and it moos, like a cow thing. But upon closer examination, it was another ant trap, so I threw it away.
Michael Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Michael: And the third time... I did it out of spite.
Michael Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Michael: You say radon is silent but deadly, and then you expect me not to make farting noises with my mouth?
Michael Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Michael: We're not gonna die of radon. We're gonna die of boredom.
Michael Observational Setup/Punchline Michael: If I had a gun with two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden, and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice.
Michael Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Michael: I would kill Bin Laden and then Toby.
Michael Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Jim: Curve the bullet like in my favorite James McAvoy film, Wanted.
Jim Absurdist Observational Angela: How about make believe land has anything you want?
Angela Deadpan/Understatement Irony/Sarcasm Dwight: You line them all up, you take one bullet, shoot them all through the throat at the same time. Watch this. Phyllis, you're Hitler.
Dwight Physical/Slapstick Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dwight: Toby, just do it! ...Ready? One bullet. And...Boom! Puuuhhh! Puuuhh!
Dwight Physical/Slapstick Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Erin: The Eagles are doing a theme of ice creams in honor of turning 60. 'Despera-dough. Witchy-womanilla.'
Erin Wordplay/Pun Observational Erin: After his last breakup, he ate 40,000 calories in three hours.
Erin Observational Character Comedy Erin: You probably shouldn't keep a baby up that late, though.
Erin Character Comedy Observational Multiple: No, Toby! No! Out! Get out right now!
Multiple Running Gag Physical/Slapstick ★ Rewatch Callback Erin: Make a random sound effect, okay? Farting noise, whatever.
Erin Setup/Punchline Absurdist Michael: It's reversible, I think.
Michael Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Unknown office worker: Boi-oi-oi-oing!
Dwight: I will do legal jujitsu on you. Gaah!
Dwight Physical/Slapstick Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Angela: I'd like to see a stool sample.
Angela Cringe/Discomfort Dark/Subversive Jim · Dwight: So we're gonna say the most likely scenario is that Michael matured overnight? Well, it happened to Tom Hanks in Big. Exactly. It happened in Big.
Jim Dwight Absurdist Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Jim: We could order in from Hooters.
Jim Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Pam · Jim: Billy Joel Rock Band. That... exists? Yes.
Michael: She's not invisible, so stop asking silly questions.
Michael Misdirection Character Comedy Jim: If you ask her husband... or you took a random poll, yeah, it's wrong.
Jim Deadpan/Understatement Observational Meredith: I ask... everyone in the room, 'are you in a relationship?'
Ryan: In Paris, it is rude for a woman to have less than four lovers.
Ryan Absurdist Character Comedy Michael: He's a sports guy. He's scummy. Dogfighting, drugs. They spit.
Michael Character Comedy Observational Michael: Ten minutes of silence honoring Michael Jackson.
Michael Misdirection Character Comedy Andy: My name is Andy Bernard, and I'm a cuckold. For those of you unfamiliar with William Shakespeare, a cuckold is a man whose woman is cheating on him.
Andy Character Comedy Observational Andy: I would so much rather... play the part on stage.
Andy Character Comedy Observational Kelly: You're Ali Larter. I'm Beyoncé. I am Beyoncé always.
Kelly Character Comedy Observational Michael: Should punch him in the nose for what he's making me do to her.
Michael Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Andy: I played batboy in Damn Yankees!
Andy Character Comedy Observational Michael: Coaching third base with two arms, two legs, and no heart. Capable of feeling pain.
Michael Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Gabe: I actually designed that chart. Kinda hoping it catches on.
Gabe: I just hate that part of the job, you know, the power dynamics.
Gabe Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Mediator: In the occurrence that the child is born an old man, a la Benjamin Button.
Dwight: I don't have $30,000 lying around. I have it buried very deeply, and I don't want to dig past a certain someone to get it.
Dwight Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Michael: You don't pay their players. I know, I know, I know. It--I'm--it- that was a euphemism.
Michael Character Comedy Misdirection Michael: I bet it's like, 'hey, Donna, why don't you wash the dishes? High-five, Donna. Hey, why don't you bring me my slippers? High-five. I'm taking all the credit.'
Michael Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Michael: High-five, Donna. Hey, why don't you bring me my slippers? High-five. I'm taking all the credit.
Dwight: Five times for $30,000? Not a bad stud fee. Better than most horses.
Dwight Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Angela: Those lumps are cats, and those cats have names, and those names are Ember, Milky Way, Diane, and Lumpy.
Angela Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Shane the Coach: Are you guys... Kenny's dads?
Michael: We're gay for baseball.
Michael Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Michael: I am so into the institution of marriage. Two good people finding each other, getting all committed to each other.
Michael Irony/Sarcasm Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Michael: But as a fan, it just helps me enjoy the game better if I know the coach loves his wife.
Michael Cringe/Discomfort Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Michael: All the time I was thinking, 'I'm sleeping with your wife.' And you know who does that? James freakin' Bond.
Michael Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Michael: And you know who does that? James freakin' Bond.
Michael: Why would you throw something wet at me? You love it.
Michael: Well, then it wouldn't be the first time I stole something away from Coach Shane.
Michael Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Michael · Oscar: I'm awful, aren't I? Yes. That's pretty bad. I'm an awful guy! Ooh!
Michael: From now on, when I'm hungry, I am going to eat whatever I am hungry for.
Michael Character Comedy Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Toby · Michael: That's Meredith's cake. It's her birthday. I don't care. I have an appetite for life!
Michael · Ryan: You know what? I think you're attractive, and I wanna sleep with you. What about Kelly? You read my mind. Is this a joke? Yep.
Ryan · Kelly · Ryan: You know what? I think you're attractive, and I wanna sleep with you. What about Kelly? You read my mind. Is this a joke? Yep.
Dwight: Schrute sperm are strong, but they're no match for a grown Schrute man.
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Darryl: He don't give an 'f' about nothin'!
Darryl Character Comedy Observational Pam: If I drink it, Cece drinks it six hours later.
Pam Observational Character Comedy Warehouse worker: Sometimes I think about it when I'm trying to fall asleep at home.
Michael: A motel is dirty and it is sexy. Like me. And like Donna.
Michael Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Michael: Because a motel is dirty and it is sexy. Like me. And like Donna.
Jim: I could have stopped him.
Jim Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Jim: I could have stopped him.
Jim Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Angela: Stop kissing me. It's not in the contract.
Angela Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Angela · Dwight: Are you warmed up? No. God, Angela, why is that always my responsibility?
Michael: How do I feel about breaking up with Donna? Good. Moral. I feel proud. Like a grownup.
Michael: And it was either living with myself or...being happy. And I picked... the... former.
Michael Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Top Episodes — The Office
