Milk Money

They call this a candidates' breakfast?!

Well, it can't be, Moira, there's a woman in cargo shorts.

Oh, bless you, dear, but a name tag does not go with this ensemble.

Not that people won't know, when they see you in that outfit. It's very shiny.

Well, I'm glad you talked me out of the Mohawk.

I was always impressed by those masquerade key parties at the Sarkosy's.

And Elvis! I'm so glad you could make it.

Well, because you look like Elvis in that... outfit there, you know, and... but the early Elvis, not the...

Hah! You are a hit!

straight from the cow's breast, to your mouth

maybe you're used to being on the wrong side of the law, but I for one am not going to prison.

Gwen has already told me she won't wait for me

Right, okay Bob, I'll keep it on the down low.

I am approachable...

That sounds more like a fact that you're sharing with me.

Stevie! Stevie! You're an average Joe... Anne.

You sound a bit like a dictator.

As a strong willed modern woman, with a high school degree, you know how hard we have to work to be taken seriously!

As a strong willed modern woman, with a high school degree, you know how hard we have to work to be taken seriously!

I actually went to college, but sure.

The queen hasn't smiled since the 70's, and her birthdays are still very well attended.

Like, really good, like, super... sun kissed, and muscle-y.

'Cause they actually gave me the 'Broken Hearts Special.' Three extra nights at no extra charge, as long as I could prove that I didn't actually make it down the aisle.

Yeah! Yeah, no, I got almost full price back for the engagement ring, and I've always wanted one of these, and it cost less than the ring, so...

It's like if the 'Sons of Anarchy' had a vet.

Except they don't wear helmets on that show, Which I get, but, it's a little dangerous.

Granted, I bought it from a man who I later found out was a drifter.

It might've been elk's milk. Is elk's milk a thing? I don't know.

You would make a terrible drug dealer, Mr. Rose.

I mean, I get it, it's fast money, and no one would ever suspect you.

I had a friend in Venice Beach who sold raw milk, and his entire compound was raided.

your trail of discarded boyfriends, Alexis, is making it very difficult to get anything done in this world.

For what? I didn't do anything.

The twelve 'things' of milk?

'Cause I was wondering why would Dad order $300.00 worth of milk?

Um... okay well, $394.40, so I guess kind of closer to $400.

I try and do something nice for somebody, You think I would at least deserve a 'thank you!'

Just remember, if things go south, there's a loaded BB gun in the back.

You're acting like I've never done this before!

I remember I just got my braces off, so...

What do you think her name was? - I don't know. - Gayle! The man marries three Gayles!

Like didn't learn anything from the first two! I mean, what is that?!

It takes a real eye to find something of quality at a clothier in Elmdale.

that's uh, Jennifer. And then he's um... Jacob. And then I'm also Jacob.

Yeah, I'm just joking. We don't have drivers' licences. Um... No, yeah, we do have driver's licenses, we don't have those names on our driver's license.

Actually, my birth name is Angelica.

You farm in that suit?

When the weather's good.

You farm in that suit?

Oh, I'm-I'm sorry, I thought you were talking to the other Jacob.

No, she looked like an ageing stewardess from a Latvian airline!

Oh, I'm sorry, I think you'll find one lodged in the middle of my back.

Oh my God, she didn't know which way was up when I was done with her!

Someone has to find naked pictures of me. Better you than a stranger in a storm cellar.

Someone has to find naked pictures of me. Better you than a stranger in a storm cellar.