Dwight scores a special assignment at Sabre's Florida headquarters. As a result, he and Andy must decide which Scranton staffers will join him. Elsewhere, Pam returns from maternity leave.
WAR
100.5
Wins Above Replacement
“Special Project” ranks #112 of 183 The Office episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 86.8 — Elite. The episode packs 98 scored jokes at 3.9 per minute, averaging 7.1 on craft and 7.0 on impact, with Dwight landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Dwight: Kevin? Kelly? Kathy? Andy just gave me a chain with three weak links. Have you ever tried to use a chain with three weak links? I have, and now I no longer own an arctic wolf.
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dwight: And, just to be clear, there is a second definition, 'perfect pork anus,' which I don't mean.
Dwight Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Ryan · Dwight: How did a mosquito get in here? / I released 300 mosquitoes into the conference room. / Just temporarily. / When I'm done, the frogs will take care of the mosquitoes.
Ryan Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist Escalation ★ Rewatch Stanley: 'Florida Stanley' smiles. 'Florida Stanley' is happy to go to work. 'Florida Stanley' is who you want on your Florida team.
Stanley Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dwight Callback Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Standout Moments
Dwight: And, just to be clear, there is a second definition, 'perfect pork anus,' which I don't mean.
Dwight Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Dwight: Kevin? Kelly? Kathy? Andy just gave me a chain with three weak links. Have you ever tried to use a chain with three weak links? I have, and now I no longer own an arctic wolf.
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Ryan · Dwight: How did a mosquito get in here? / I released 300 mosquitoes into the conference room. / Just temporarily. / When I'm done, the frogs will take care of the mosquitoes.
Ryan Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist Escalation ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 98 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Jim: Look what I can do now that she's no longer pregnant. Bam, bam, bam, bam.
Jim Physical/Slapstick Character Comedy Coworker · Pam: Are you glad to be back? Yeah-- Yeah, I mean I could have used another week or three.
Stanley: You still had eight weeks more than we did.
Stanley Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Angela: Angela returns to work four days after giving birth, calling it a 'long, luxurious, Parisian maternity leave' with exaggerated disdain
Angela Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Kevin: Damn, girl, your body.
Kevin Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Angela: Really? I feel like this big rhinoceros.
Angela Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Pam · Kevin: Oh, Angela, those brownies have walnuts in them and I think Kevin's allergic to walnuts. You're allergic to walnuts, right, Kevin? Extremely, but I'm going to fight through it.
Pam · Angela: Aw, it's okay, Angela. I have mommy-brain too. / I don't know what that is, Pam.
Angela: I made a batch with no nuts, special for you, Kevin. It's right here.
Angela Character Comedy Misdirection ★ Rewatch Callback Coworker · Angela · Pam: When did you find time to do all this? Babies sleep a lot, Pam. If you feed them enough. Brownie, Pam?
Pam · Angela: Thank you. Oh, my gosh, it's really good. I wouldn't know, I'm watching my weight.
Jim · Andy: So, you guys, you know what's an even more useful treat is cash, so-- Nope, it's over.
Jim Andy Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Dwight · Andy: You can't tantalize me. Oh, maybe I can.
Dwight: If you make me head of sales one more time, I swear.
Dwight Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Dwight: Yes, yes, yes, yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
Dwight Character Comedy Reaction Beat Dwight: The Schrutes have a word for when everything in a man's life comes together perfectly. Perfectenschlag. Right now, I am in it.
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dwight: I am finally get a chance to prove myself to corporate. I am assembling a competent team. I am likely a father.
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Erin: And here's the fax for you. And here's some facts for you. Did you know frogs can hear with their lungs? And that flamingos can have orgasms that last 30 minutes.
Erin Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Erin: Yeah, it's weird that I said that last one.
Erin Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Callback Jim · Andy: We're pin twins. / Pin twins.
Jim Andy Character Comedy Awkward Silence Andy: This is a gift from Jessica, kind of a gag gift, really. Real gifts come later.
Andy Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Jim: When I saw it in CVS, it made me gag too.
Jim Irony/Sarcasm Deadpan/Understatement Callback Erin: For awhile there, I thought something would change, but, nope, Andy's still with Jessica. They even carpool together most days.
Erin Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Erin: I don't know, I wouldn't mind carpooling every day with Andy. But I wouldn't want to spend that much time with Jessica.
Erin Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Callback Darryl: Val knit me a beanie. But I can't tell if it's a 'we're just friends' beanie or a 'I'm hot, you're hot, let's get it popping' beanie.
Darryl Character Comedy Observational Dwight: Pam, pack up your postnatal swimwear, make it a one-piece, or this offer is rescinded...
Dwight Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Dwight: God, you're such a spy.
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Darryl: You like it? Super comfortable, like sweatpants for my head.
Darryl Observational Character Comedy Darryl: It's really itchy, but to be fair, my head is constantly itching. So I can't really peg it on the hat.
Darryl Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Callback Darryl: Wow, it's like the nation of Islam down here.
Darryl Observational Character Comedy Val · Darryl: I like to knit. Don't hate. And who's that for? Oh, this is a gift for my man, Nate, here.
Val Darryl Character Comedy Misdirection Callback Nate · Darryl: Darryl, you shouldn't have. Can I open it? No, no, no, maybe just-- Ah, I can't wait, I'm sorry, I'm too excited.
Nate · Darryl: Wow, those are really nice. They're so elegant. / Cashmere. / How'd you know? / Just a hunch.
Nate Darryl Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Callback Nate: Your card is more beautiful than the gloves.
Nate Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Callback Dwight: My first task as Special Project Manager, Dwight Schrute? Assembling a crack team.
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Dwight: I need people who are loyal. People who will help me get an inroad with the gay-hispanic community. People who won't be missed.
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dwight · Toby · Kathy: We don't need idiots. / This hurts. / Good for nothings. / Meth-heads. / Or-- What's your name? / Kathy.
Jim · Andy: Two question marks. / No, just do one. / Two question marks is kind of aggressive. You know, it's like, 'wh-- what?'
Jim Andy Observational Character Comedy Andy · Dwight: You want to take Darryl, Phyllis, Toby, Angela, and Oscar? Can I interest you in someone less essential? Like a-- A Creed or a Meredith perhaps? / Oh, my God.
Andy: They're not expendable, exactly, I just can't-- I can't think of the word I'm trying to find.
Andy Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Jim · Andy: It's perfect. You emphasized the golf, completely omit the Florida. / Yeah, it's a golf text. / Total golf text, send it.
Jim Andy Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Jim: You want to call someone that texted you? Do you want to drive them away? I mean--?
Jim Observational Irony/Sarcasm Darryl · Val's boyfriend Brandon: This is Darryl. / Oh, sorry, I asked for the main shipping number. I just need the address for the warehouse. I want to send my girlfriend some flowers. / Your girlfriend? Is your girlfriend Val?
Darryl: We're friends, we're friends.
Darryl Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Darryl · Val's boyfriend Brandon: Yeah, yeah, sorry, I'm just looking for a pen. / Why do you need a pen? / Back off. I got my reasons.
Dwight · Stanley: Oh, I'm sorry, Stanley. I can't share any more details with you. You see, Andy rejected you.
Toby: Wait, Kathy gets to go? Why does she even still work here? Pam is back.
Toby Character Comedy Observational Dwight: I can understand your pain and your rage, but you know what? Andy is an honorable man, let us not question his choices.
Dwight Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Kevin: Sometimes Batman's got to take off his cape.
Kevin Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dwight: Good point, but we're going to be working pretty hard until 5:00 P.M. After that, it's gonna be beach volleyball, trips to Cape Canaveral, and sea-kayaking with Gloria Estefan.
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist Dwight: It might be innate goodness versus innate badness. But there's an easy way to find out.
Dwight Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Andy Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Andy · Pam · Andy: Oh, because you and your enormous monster-baby are so important to the branch. / My baby is not a monster. / Hey, be proud of your enormous monster-baby. I was once an enormous monster-baby.
Stanley · Andy · Pam · Toby: Stop calling us 'guys.' / I use the word 'guys' a lot when I'm nervous. / Guys. / Guys, guys, guys. / Andy, please. / Stop it, Andy. / Dudes-- / Andy.
Stanley: Every shirt that I have that isn't a work shirt is a Tommy Bahama. I'm the only person in this office who watches Burn Notice.
Stanley Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Andy · Dwight: So if you feel like you have a very good reason to go to Florida, I'm happy to hear you out. / Great idea. / So why doesn't everyone just take the next five to six hours, come up with a statement...
Andy · Dwight: No, that is a ridiculous waste of time. / For you, maybe.
Jim Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch Callback Ryan: I have a new swimsuit I need to break in.
Ryan Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Dwight: Powerpoints are the peacocks of the business world. All show, no meat.
Dwight Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Kevin: Because I feel like that I'm at a place with my gambling rehab that I can finally start going to dog racing again. You know, just sitting, watching, enjoying the sport. Maybe putting down a few dollars, if there's, like, a crazy mismatch or something.
Kevin Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Toby · Dwight · Toby: It has been a long, lonely winter. Wow, seasonal affective disorder, aka, 'SAD.' That sounds like a very real thing, Toby. / It is real. Thank you for saying that.
Dwight: Yeah, wow, it's almost like we're not all experiencing the same winter.
Dwight Irony/Sarcasm Deadpan/Understatement Stanley: 'Florida Stanley' smiles. 'Florida Stanley' is happy to go to work. 'Florida Stanley' is who you want on your Florida team.
Stanley Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Erin · Dwight: Hey, guys, any spots left? / Erin, you want to go to Tallahassee? / I do. I really do. I think it would be a nice way to clear my head.
Dwight: You know, I don't think it's a good idea for you to clear your head anymore than it has been already. I think you need a workplace where the burdens of everyday life keep you tethered to reality.
Dwight Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Jim · Pam: Now, is it too dark to say that Cece's having an operation? / I think you need to go to Florida.
Jim Pam Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Pam · Jim: It's only for three weeks. You know, with my mom and sister at the house it'll be-- / A total nightmare. / I was going to say, 'good, because I'll have all the help I need.' / Yeah, that's what I'm saying. They're incredibly helpful. You're lucky to have them.
Pam Jim Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Dwight · Andy · Dwight: No, no, absolutely not. You are not going. Over my dead body, no. / Tunes, I'm really sorry. You're too essential to the operation here. I can't let you go. / I wouldn't say that. That's a bit much.
Jim · Dwight: You know, Dwight, if you didn't want me to go, the smart move would be to tell Andy that I actually am essential to the operation. That way I couldn't go. / Jim is essential to-- / Hold on, just want to get it on camera.
Jim Dwight Character Comedy Meta/Self-Referential ★ Rewatch Dwight · Jim: Essential. / This is stupid. Cut. / All right, I'm going to pack my trunks. / He doesn't even want to go.
Dwight Jim Character Comedy Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch Callback Dwight · Jim: Well, I got a text from RC inviting me to come down, so I think that's going to make us roommates. / Oh, my God. / Do you shower at night or do you shower in the morning? Because I want to shower when you're showering to save some water.
Dwight Jim Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Jim: Hey, quick question. Do you shower at night or do you shower in the morning? Because I want to shower when you're showering to save some water.
Jim Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Dwight: Aah! / Let's go. Step it up, you runts. Infants, let's move. Why is it so hot in here? / Hot? What are you talking about? This is a nice, temperate, Florida morning. 85 degrees, 73% humidity.
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dwight: The next three weeks of your life are going to be the most miserable you've ever faced. They're going to be hard, they're going to be dirty. You're going to wish you were dead. But. / But? There's no buts. That's it, you'll wish you were dead.
Dwight Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Ryan · Dwight · Ryan: Is that the buzzer from Taboo? / Shut up, maggot! / It is.
Dwight: How many of you have seen the documentary Deliverance?
Dwight Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Dwight: Yes, then he brushes your soft, supple cheeks with his worn, leathery hands and says, 'I'm going to make you the seventh Mrs. Rosenblatt.'
Dwight Character Comedy Absurdist Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Dwight · Ryan: You want to spend the rest of your life changing your husband's colostomy bags? / Huh, do you? / Ring it. Ah. / What was that? / Mosquito.
Dwight Ryan Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Nate: 'This coupon entitles you to one free tickle-monster attack.' / Yeah, they're Nate coupons, or 'Na-pons,' and they're all different. Cash that one in and I will bring you a stick of gum. Any time, any place. I'll find you.
Nate Character Comedy Absurdist Darryl · Val: Nice flowers. / Thanks, they're from my mom. / Your mom? / Yeah. / Oh, so I guess that was your mom who called me earlier looking for the address? Real deep-voiced woman. / Yeah, that's her. / She said her name was Brandon, I think. / Your mom's name is Brandon?
Darryl Val Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Val: Yeah, Darryl, my mom's name is Brandon.
Val Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Darryl: I guess I figured out where I stand. This is a love beanie.
Darryl Character Comedy Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Erin: I'm going to Florida and I'm not coming back.
Erin Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Ryan: It did, it did. You know what might be great is if instead of a genius bar, we have a lounge area where people can ask questions about the product with other customers who liked it.
Ryan Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Erin Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Jim · Dwight: Oh, don't write it down unless you like it. / Oh, I like it.
Dwight: No, we sell business tools, and the stores need to reflect that. They need to be all business. Let all the other stores look like a toy store. Right, think different from Apple.
Dwight Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Dwight: I had been given the responsibility to manage Stanley, a solid player. Ryan, who is capable of surprises. Erin, an excellent follower. And Kathy, a probably not totally useless enigma. And, well, Jim.
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Dwight: Under the right manager, that's not a bad team.
Dwight Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Callback Dwight Callback Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Jim · Pam: Hey, will you put this coat on my chair? I just realized I'm not going to need it down there. / Yes, I will take your coat and I will keep it with me. And I will sleep with it, because it smells like you. / No, no, no, no, just put it on my chair.
Jim Pam Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Pam · Jim · Pam: Goodbye. / For a very, very long time. / Hmm? Okay. / It's only three weeks.
Kathy: All expenses paid. / Yeah, Jim's going to be there. That marriage is not good. Nobody knows better than me.
Kathy Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Dwight: Definitely we will. / It's three weeks in Tallahassee. What else is there to do?
Dwight Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Top Episodes — The Office
