Roys Wedding

Pam:Pam introduces the chore wheel concept in a talking head — a non-spinning wheel she calls a wheel.

Kevin · Pam:"A wheel is supposed to spin." / "No, I'm familiar with spinning. It's just, that wouldn't work with a chore wheel, because people might get the same chore." / "Bah! Boring. All she talks about is chores."

Dwight:"A wheel wants to spin, Pam. Spinning would be more fun." — Dwight in talking head

Office Staff:The office has rigged the chore wheel to actually spin — reaction shot of the office cheering as the wheel spins.

Kevin · Pam:"This sucks. Yeah, seriously. It's like everything on there is work." / "Yeah, and I don't think that you understand wheels."

Pam:Pam's talking head: 'I've been through several rounds of development with the team...' — revealing the chore wheel has now become a prize/penalty wheel with no chores on it.

Office Staff:"Tiny Wheel! Tiny Wheel! Tiny Wheel!" — the office chanting around a tiny version of the wheel

Pam:"The Tiny Wheel actually does have chores. It's so cute, no one seems to mind." Then someone lands on 'Toilets!' and seems unbothered.

Jim:Jim's talking head: 'I think the only weird thing about going to your wife's ex-fiancé's wedding on a weekday at 8:00 a.m. is that it's your wife's ex-fiancé.'

Pam · Jim:Pam: 'I'm afraid he's only going to have hot dogs.' / Jim: 'Come on. Not even Roy would have hot dogs at his wedding.' / Pam: 'I planned a wedding with him. He wanted hot dogs.'

Jim:Jim's silent reaction to the hot dog revelation — 'It's so weird.' Beat of silence, then a look to camera.

Pete · Pam:Pete opens a letter addressed to 'Customer Service' with excitement, only to be told it's not his personal mail.

Pam:'Oh, yeah. I accidentally read it. It's not a nice letter.' — about the already-opened Newsweek

Nellie:'The special projects fairy has arrived.' — Nellie entering the office

Nellie:'I'd like to see him piss on that one.' — Nellie in talking head about Andy rejecting her charity initiative

Jim · Pam · Roy:Jim and Pam arriving at what appears to be Roy's very nice house, being offered mimosas and banana peels being taken away by staff

Roy · Jim · Pam:Roy introduces Pam as 'My ex-fiancée. Ha-ha.' to the stranger — then Jim's reaction

Jim:Jim's talking head: 'I started a new business with my college friend, but Pam doesn't know... Actually I did tell Pam and we decided No. But then I decided Yes anyway...'

Kevin:'It's a great prank. I want to work with Jimmy Carter and help build gnomes.' — about Heifers International giving goats to poor people

Andy:Andy: 'I give to a foundation that teaches homeless children nautical flag signaling. It changes lives.'

Dwight:Dwight: 'I will not be participating, as there is no evidence that charity works.'

Andy:Andy: 'I'm not doing it for you. I'm doing it for the preservation of nautical flag signaling.'

Dwight:Dwight chooses the Global Relief Foundation — 'which was recently discovered to be a front for the Taliban.'

Andy:Andy: 'Great heroin, though.' — about the Taliban

Dwight:'The nanny state is over, ladies and gentlemen! You're welcome.' — Dwight declares victory as Nellie caves

Roy:'Is it almost time to cut the pancake or what?' — at Roy's fancy wedding breakfast

Roy · Pam · Jim:Roy: 'Come on, if it wasn't for you, I never would have met Lara. I mean, seriously, I kind of dodged a bullet on that one. I'm just kidding. You're welcome.'

Jim:Jim: 'Not gravel, obviously.' — when Roy asks what Jim is up to professionally

Ken/Roy's Friend:Roy's friend interrupting about the $50,000 sports car — 'Hey, bro. Stop wasting time with this haircut.'

Clark · Erin:Clark's fake news producer pitch to Erin: 'You'll just come over, put on a little lipstick, loosen up with a glass of red wine and then we'll just run through a few stories. You know, a couple of different ways in a couple of different outfits. It'd be really tasteful...'

Pete:Clark's talking head: 'No, Clark's not my friend. He is the douche that sits next to me at the office. My friends are Scott, Glen and Rob, but you don't know them.'

Erin:Erin's talking head: 'I never really thought much about being more than a receptionist, but why? Because I happened to answer a Help Wanted ad to be a receptionist? I mean, what if the ad had been for a CEO or for a brain surgeon?'

Jim · Pam:Jim and Pam compete to reveal surprising things about each other — Jim tries to surprise her with the 'court-side Sixers tickets' story; Pam completes it for him.

Jim:'I mean, every game is an away game for one of the teams.' — Jim's philosophical defense of the Phoenix Sixers situation

Jim · Pam:Jim tries to tell a surprising story about his brothers tricking him with lottery numbers on tape, but Pam already knows the ending.

Angela:Angela's talking head about 'the Senator and I still have mystery' — cut to her looking uncomfortable/uncertain at Roy's wedding

Dwight · Nellie:Dwight offers to live under Taliban law to trap Nellie into abandoning Operation Giveback.

Dwight:Dwight's talking head: 'I feared Nellie had some sort of a plan. But she used a ridiculous font. You don't have a plan. When you use a ridiculous font, no one thinks you have a plan.'

Dwight · Nellie:Dwight steals Nellie's pen and taunts her: 'Oh, this is a lovely pen. And it's mine now because I stole it.'

Dwight · Nellie:Dwight: 'That means you're not serious or someone's getting their hand cut off.'

Dwight:Dwight extends his hand to be chopped off with the cleaver.

Dwight:Dwight's exit advice: 'Tie a shoe. Toss a salad. Do any of the two-hand activities that you'll miss the most.'

Andy · Clark:Andy asks about Clark's fake news audition wardrobe for Erin — Clark specifies: button-downs, camisole, blazer, pencil skirt, stilettos ('definitely open-toed'), something low-cut ('industry secret: camera makes everything seem higher-cut'), seamed pantyhose, and a robe 'he probably has at his place.'

Darryl:Darryl: 'I absolutely will do that.' — then Darryl's talking head: 'Guess I'll just head over to the mall, then. Buy Erin some sexy fun outfits. That Clark, huh?'

Kevin · Angela:Angela's 'oldy-weds' game comment and Kevin asking 'What's the craziest place you ever made whoopee?'

Jim · Pam:Jim correctly guesses Pam's celebrity crush was John Stamos — then Pam reveals John Stamos was 'temporary' before Johnny Depp, then George Clooney — and Jim says 'Johnny Depp. Totally.'

Jim:Jim apologizes: 'Sorry, I was having a separate conversation with Kevin.'

Pam · Jim:Jim's reaction to seeing his business partner at Roy's wedding — his talking head acknowledging 'I think maybe there actually is something I don't know about Jim.'

Andy:Andy to the office: 'I want her to feel very comfortable in her very sexy skin. So, everybody say something that you like about her body.'

Darryl:Darryl: 'I like Erin's hair. It's a very pretty color.' — as his body compliment contribution

Oscar · Andy:Oscar calls out the absurdity of the body-compliment exercise. Andy responds: 'Newsflash, everyone, the human race finds attractive people more trustworthy.' Then: 'Walter Cronkite. Cronkite was hot! If I could go back in time, I'd take that moustache ride.'

Erin:Erin's news story: 'Afghan President Hamid Karzai declared a new policy of Dollar Days throughout the country, promising low, low prices on all 2012 Kia Sentras and Sonatas. Aren't you glad you waited? Karzai commented.'

Erin:Erin: 'A little bit here, a little bit there.' — when asked where she got the story

Erin:'I bet you didn't think I knew current events.' — Erin to Andy after the Karzai story

Erin · Andy:Erin struggles to pause long enough after 'For Channel Eleven News' — multiple takes get increasingly desperate

Pam · Jim:Pam invents a story about a divorced high school guy hitting on her at the mall — 'And I didn't tell you because I felt embarrassed, and I didn't know if you'd be mad, or worried.'

Jim · Pam:'God, give it up, Beesly. You know me too well.' — Jim in the car after the secret game, long pause

Andy:Andy, realizing Erin's audition needs a co-anchor, suggests Pete because 'he's already got rapport with Erin' — then Andy inserts himself as co-anchor instead.

Dwight · Nellie:Dwight brings '127 Hours' as 'inspiration' for Nellie's hand-chopping decision — 'No, no, no! No spoilers, please.'

Pete:Pete arrives as makeup guy: 'Sorry, man. Andy thought Erin needed a co-anchor. I'm his makeup guy. My hands are tied.'

Andy · Erin:Andy's news co-anchor pun: 'You know what they say, Erin, if you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen.' / Erin: 'Well, he tried to, but the fire door was blocked.'

Clark:Clark immediately calls 'That's a wrap, everybody' after the first usable take — clearly trying to end things before Andy ruins the footage further.

Andy:Andy pushes for more takes: 'We could do it in a close-up. That might even be better for editing.' — clearly wanting to stay on camera

Erin:Erin's talking head: 'Hey, even if this doesn't work out for me, I'm just glad I had the guts to do it. And maybe it will work out for Andy.'

Erin:Erin's talking head: 'Hey, even if this doesn't work out for me, I'm just glad I had the guts to do it. And maybe it will work out for Andy.'

Dwight · Nellie:Dwight and Nellie watching 127 Hours: 'The way he just cuts off his arm.' / 'If you like James Franco, we really should watch Rise of the Planet of the Apes.'

Kevin · Dwight:James Franco is a genius debate: 'Well, it doesn't make you stupid.' / 'Well, yeah, it does actually. It makes you real stupid.' / 'Stupid like you. No, like you! Like you! You're the stupid one...' (ongoing)