Karen Filippelli

Josh · Karen · Jim · Stamford Office:The Stamford office scene where someone off-screen shouts 'Suck up!' at Karen for answering Josh's question, then Josh proceeds as if nothing happened

Andy · Karen:Andy declares that Karen's snack food preferences fall 'under the umbrella of his authority' as project supervisor and that work stops until she gets the chips she requires

Andy · Karen:Andy insists Karen is 'not a quitter' when she tries to end the chip quest; Karen: 'I am not a quitter. I will do this all day, if you want.' Andy: 'Really?' Karen: 'Yeah, all day.'

Jim · Andy · Karen:Jim's deadpan recap to the third party joining: 'We went right for the copier. Mm-hmm. And then we checked the fax machine. Yeah, nothing there.'

Mose · Karen · Dwight:The Cardigans' 'Love Me' playing at Schrute Farm, apparently initiated by Mose; Karen asks it to stop; the song continues through her protests with everyone powerless to stop it

Jim · Karen:Jim asks Karen to help retrieve his stuck vending machine chips with her 'skinny little arms.'

Andy · Jim · Karen:(ANDY AND JIM SINGING together) / Wait. / The less I seek my source / Oh, come on, guys, please. / The closer I am to fine / That's not good. / Tuna! Are you kidding me?

Karen · Andy:Drunk Andy stumbles out, and Karen yells: 'Hey, dummy, get in the car.' / Andy: 'I'm a drunk driver.' / Karen: 'Yes, you are.'

Andy · Karen:Andy in the car: 'And I am just going to lie down in the back, if that's all right?' — Karen: 'Sure. Here's your bag. Just don't puke on anything.'

Karen:Jim's Stamford coworker confesses to camera: 'I mean, I don't think he's into me or anything, but I'm kind of into him, so there you go.'

Jim · Karen:Karen sits at Jim's old desk; Jim realizes he has to move his things; Karen says 'You can call it whatever you want' about her taking the desk

Jim · Karen:Jim returns to his old desk. Karen is sitting there. Long uncomfortable pause, then: 'Oh. Um... Then I must be really really wanna pack.'

Karen:Karen's talking head: 'Yeah, Jim is a nice guy. That's why I got the desk.'

Michael · Karen:Michael leaving Karen a voicemail in an increasingly 'Italian' accent, coaching himself: 'Try more Italian'

Karen · Pam:New employee (presumably Karen or Martin) observing Michael's Vance Refrigeration meltdown: 'Is he always like this?' / Pam: 'Sometimes he brings more costumes.' / 'When do people work?' / 'Oh, we find little times during the day.'

Jim · Karen:Jim tells Karen he's messing with Andy, sending him to women in the office 'with just terrible information on how to get them to go out with him.' Karen: 'I love it. I want in.'

Karen · Jim:The Stamford people's reaction to the Party Planning Committee dynamics — 'It would never work here.'

Karen · Jim:Does anyone ever stand up to Angela? / I think one of her cats did once. She came in with scratches all over her face.

Angela · Karen · Pam:The 'Committee to Plan Parties' flyer vs. Angela's Party Planning Committee — 'There's no such thing as the Committee to Plan Parties. There is now.'

Pam · Karen · Angela · Dwight:Karen and Pam's 'Committee to Plan Parties' rival flyer: $200 funding. Angela: 'What's ours again?' Dwight: '$201.'

Karen · Pam:There's a party that starts at 3:00. / Right. / And then there's a way more fun party that starts at 2:45.

Pam · Karen:Are we taking this too far? / I don't think we're taking this far enough. / What? / I got goose bumps.

Jim · Dwight · Karen:Jim narrates a series of increasingly absurd fake events into Dwight's tape recorder — Dwight taking off his pants, having a knife, being completely nude, wearing a baby bonnet, Jim Carrey walking in, a Muppet Babies tattoo, and finally chopping off Phyllis's head with a chainsaw

Karen:Karen's confessional: she saw an apartment for rent near Jim's and 'he said he didn't think it'd be such a good idea... it would be like we were living together in different houses, two blocks away'

Karen · Pam:Karen thanks Pam for 'talking sense into Halpert' about the apartment; mentions 'the Days Inn Room 228 was starting to get really depressing'

Karen:Karen's talking head after the client says Jim 'was hung up on Pam for such a long time': 'That's nice. You can pay me back later for the makeover.'

Karen:Karen's reaction after the client mentions Jim was hung up on Pam: 'That's nice.' followed by implied awkward silence.

Dwight · Karen:Dwight: 'My girlfriend is also beautiful and smart. She could be a model, or a college professor — which is intimidating to a lot of guys. We should go on a double date.' Karen: 'No, thank you.'

Karen · Jim:Karen's talking head: Jim admits he had a crush on Pam before leaving for Stamford. Karen: 'Did I ever have a thing for her? No. Why, did she say something?'

Karen:Karen and I have had a little bit of a rough patch for the past couple weeks, but we had some really good talks and, actually now, I think that we're better than ever.

Karen · Pam:Karen confronts Pam: Jim told her about the kiss. / But you're not still interested in him? / Oh, yeah. / Really? / Oh, no! I was confused by your phrasing.

Pam · Karen:You should definitely go out with Jim. I mean, you're going out with Jim. I'm not going out with Jim. / You're dating him, which is awesome, because you guys are great together.

Karen · Pam:What are you sorry about? / Nothing. I was just thinking of something else.

Jim · Karen:Jim and Karen's moment: Jim reveals he paid Scrantonicity $20 to play 'their song' — which turns out to be a song they associate together.

Jim · Karen:Karen clarifies: 'It's only temporary, okay? Don't get excited.' Jim: 'I won't, I won't, I won't, I won't'

Karen:I'm the only one left. Everybody else was either fired or quit. And there's one in anger management.

Karen:That's Drake. And just so, you know, I don't want to be weird or anything, but we used to date. And it didn't end well.

Karen · Jim:Well, if you're wondering why his wife was staring daggers at me, it's because I kind of saw him for a little bit when they were separated. Oh, didn't notice. Really? I thought it was so obvious.

Karen · Jim:Don't mention that you and I are dating 'cause I think he might still have feelings for me. Wallace? What the hell? Have you dated, like, every guy here?

Karen · Jim:You got me. So none of them? Of course not. I mean you're, kind of, like, my first. Oh, my God, it's so easy... it's not even fun.

Karen · Jim:Karen calls Jim 'agoraphobic' for preferring to watch a Phillies game on the couch over going out

Kevin · Karen:Kevin asks Karen how she feels that Roy tried to 'kick her boyfriend's ass over another woman'

Dwight · Karen:Dwight approaches Karen: 'Hey, Karen. Hey, Dwight. Lookin' sharp.' — Dwight realizes compliment, starts to reveal he's Jim

Dwight · Karen:Dwight (as Jim): 'Wanna get together later and have sexual intercourse, 'cause you're my girlfriend? Do you?' Karen: 'No.' Dwight: 'Okay. I'm good. Thanks.'

Michael · Pam · Karen:The pros and cons list for Jan: Pros include 'Nice butt' and 'Perfect skin.' Cons include 'Breasts not anything to write home about,' 'Flat-chested,' and 'I'm unhappy when I'm with her.'

Michael · Karen:Michael: 'I cannot believe this yogurt has no calories.' Karen: 'No one said it has no calories.'

Karen:Karen's talking head: 'I'm kind of in between boyfriends right now, so I don't need anything sexy. But I do need some new hand towels. I figure I can cut up this robe.'

Karen:Karen's talking head: 'You know? I changed a tire today. All by myself. This bathrobe's already coming in handy.'

Karen · Jim:Karen calls David Wallace to interview for the New York job — and Jim overhears, mispronounces 'as well' as 'in well', then jokes 'This job is in a well. I don't want it.'

Michael · Jim · Karen:Michael pitches a 'convoy' to New York, describing mooning each other while driving

Jim · Pam · Karen:Jim tells Pam 'I really miss our friendship' — but Pam immediately realizes he's just rehearsing what he said to her at the beach, calling it 'patheticville'

Michael · Pam · Phyllis · Angela · Karen:'Defcon 20. She wants to get back together.' / 'How can she make you get back together with her?' / 'She made me do a lot of things I didn't wanna do.'

Karen:Karen tells her driver she's throwing herself a 'congratulations Karen' party for getting a job she hasn't gotten yet

Karen · Jim:Karen suggests going to the UN for their New York night out

Jim · Karen:Jim: 'How often do you come here?' / Karen: 'Every time my sixth grade class has a field trip.' / Jim: 'I think you'll really enjoy this, adult Jim.'

Jim · Karen:Jim and Karen's New York night: dinner at the Spotted Pig, 'second acted' Spamalot by sneaking in with smokers, a bar in a former church, and possibly seeing Lorne Michaels

Karen · Jim:Karen in the car: 'We won't have a future in Scranton. There's one too many people there.' / Jim: 'You mean Kevin?' / Karen: 'Exactly.'

Karen · Jim:Karen on the phone, having apparently gotten the corporate job: 'I'm so glad. We're all very excited you're going to be joining us.' — cut to her hanging up and Jim's number in her phone: 'Who was that?' / 'Nobody. You and I are done.'

Pam · Karen:Pam to Karen (implied): 'You still missing Ryan?' Karen: 'Not so much anymore.'

Karen:Karen's opening monologue: 'Turns out it's a pretty easy gig when your boss isn't an idiot and your boyfriend's not in love with somebody else.'

Jim · Karen:Jim runs into Karen in the Utica parking lot while wearing a disguise. 'I'm just checking on the other branches. Michael wants me to do that from time to time, so...'

Karen:Karen (talking head): 'I cried for weeks over that guy, so yeah, seeing him climb out of a PT Cruiser in a ladies warehouse uniform felt pretty good.'

Michael · Karen:Michael to Karen: 'You can expect these kind of repercussions as long as you keep trying to poach our people.' Karen: 'I'm taking Stanley.' Michael: 'Then we will burn Utica to the ground.'

Jim · Karen:Karen confronts Jim: 'So you're still doing this kind of stuff, huh?' Jim: 'Yeah, trying to quit though.'

Jim · Karen:Jim's verbal spiral: 'Pam and I are still dating, so, and, I just mean that things are going really well, so I didn't want to see you.'

Karen:Karen: 'Oh, things are going really well? Are they? They are? That's great, that's so great. I wanna hear more about how happy you are with Pam. Can you tell me more about that?'

Karen:Karen: 'Thank you so much for coming to Utica, and breaking my copier, and telling me how well things are going in your relationship.'

Jim · Karen:Jim: 'I'm going to go because of the... traffic.' Karen: 'Traffic, yeah.' Followed by an extended awkward exit.

Pam · Karen:Karen comforts Karen about the copier being broken; offers to invite her to the Finer Things Club. — actually Pam offers Karen a comfort.

Michael · Karen:Michael walks into the Utica branch: 'Oh, this is a nice office.' Karen, dryly: 'You don't have to lie.'

Michael · Karen · Pam:Karen walks in visibly pregnant. Michael: 'Oh my god. Is that Jim's?' Everyone: 'Michael!' Michael: 'Okay... my head just exploded.'

Michael · Karen:Michael: 'Wow, you're huge! That's incredible! I'm just trying to figure out the last time you and Jim had sex and—'

Karen · Michael:Karen: 'Let's just get this over with, shall we?' Michael, counting: 'Ten. Ten months?'

Michael · Karen:Michael pretends his phone is a cell phone to fake receiving tragic news: 'I have to do a presentation. I'll talk to you — This is going to be hard for me to speak today because I just learned that my father has died.' Karen: 'No, he didn't! He is alive. And this isn't even a cell phone. This is a calculator.'

Michael · Karen · Pam:Karen shows Michael and Pam a photo on her phone: 'This is us.' Michael: 'So dorky.' Pam: 'Oh, he's cute.' Karen: 'Yeah, he's so cute.' Michael: 'He's a dermatologist.' Karen: 'He's a dermatologist. We met at a bar. Can you believe that?' Michael, looking at another photo: 'What is happening there?' Karen: 'Oh yeah, don't even.' Pam: 'That's really dorky.' Michael: 'It's really dorky. You were right the first time.'